A Worthy Character

From FW Index

Are You Up On Your Pedestal?

11377300_447097495466785_2200149488863017999_n

Fine character in a woman will stir deep feelings in a man. It may awaken love. It surely will let him know that he can trust you with his feelings, thoughts, and dreams.

Some Traits of Fine Character

Self-Control

It seems no other trait pertains to so many things as does self-control. You need this trait to be successful in many areas of your life. It helps you control your tongue, appetites, thoughts, money, emotions, time, and more. How do you gain self-control?

-Develop a sense of self-worth and a good self-image. This will give you the confidence you need to trust in your decisions. Remember that it is a feminine trait to vacillate. You need to trust yourself and your decisions.

-Doing without food for a period of time while you fast and pray will give you a head-start on gaining self-control. Fasting accompanied by prayer will also give you the spiritual strength you need to fight the battle with your will and win.

-Get in the habit of telling yourself “no” or doing something difficult in order to train your will every day. You can do something unpleasant, or eat something you don’t like, take on a hard job, go without something you usually allow yourself, put yourself on a time limit, or other such things.

-An important element of self-control is determination. Set your face like a flint and make up your mind that you are going to succeed. Don’t allow discouragement, hardships, or temporary setbacks to keep you from your goal. Make sure others don’t hinder you with side issues, time wasters, or discouraging talk. Keep your eye on the goal and stick with it.

 Unselfishness

It takes a fair amount of self-thought to gain self-control, but at the same time you have to be unselfish. This seems to be a contradiction. Self-love is what you need to take care of yourself and stick to your standards and goals. Unselfishness is giving part of yourself for the good of someone else. It does not mean you compromise your standards, but that you put the needs of someone else in the forefront even when it causes you some discomfort.

There are many of us who can be kind when it’s easy and costs us nothing, but for an act to be truly unselfish it must have an element of sacrifice on your part. You do not have to love the person you are caring for, but instead are moved to action because it is what you do when someone has a need – unselfishness is a principle you live by.

Charity

While unselfishness spurs us to action because of duty, charity causes us to act because of feeling. Charity is deep love for another regardless of race, social standing or religion – it is much like the love of our Father toward us. This kind of love awakens service toward others.

Your first duty as a wife and mother is to your family and home, but after these needs are met, you have a duty as a charitable woman to the outside world. There are many less fortunate or weaker than you that need your help.

There are three main parts to charity – compassion, understanding the need, and sacrifice. Compassion will cause you to see the worth and value of an individual. It’s what causes you to take notice of them in the first place. After you notice them, a wise person will get to the root of the situation and perceive the actual need. Meeting the need will most likely require some sort of personal sacrifice or discomfort. It may mean going the second mile. It will help you if you remember, service is almost never convenient.

Humility

As I have stated before, humility is not false modesty that comes from denying you have talents or gifts of some sort. A humble person knows they have these things, but also knows how to use them, appreciate them and appreciate the talent in others. You are not arrogant or proud about your gifts, but instead are thankful and appreciative of them, and desire to use them in the best way. A humble person is free from a feeling of superiority over others and is aware of their own shortcomings.

It is all too easy to let things like riches, money and possessions, knowledge and learning, good looks and figure, character traits, and social standing become sources of pride. If you notice yourself looking down at others or becoming critical of those not as fortunate as you in some area, then pride is rearing its ugly head. Yes, you may have a gift someone else does not have, but you have your own areas of lack, too.

Keep things in perspective. No one is so wonderful and marvelous that they have no need of humility. Humility is essential to a person of high character.

Responsibility

Responsibility is the trait of getting a job done that has been entrusted to you, and doing the job right, to the best of your ability, and having it done on time. This trait is especially needed when you have no one looking over your shoulder to make sure the job gets done.

This is what so many wives of today are lacking – a sense of responsibility for the work they do in their homes and for their families. You don’t have a time clock to punch or a manager coming by to check on you to make sure the job is getting done. Without this outside pressure, many of us just don’t do as good of a job at home as we would do somewhere else. What’s missing? That trait of responsibility.

Even when parts of your work are done by others, such as with daycare or hiring a housekeeper, your responsibility to see the job gets done is still yours. The children and the house are still yours to look after, and it is a serious flaw to tack a lax attitude about your responsibilities.

Diligence

Diligence is closely related to responsibility, in my opinion. Responsibility lets you know that you have important work to take care of, and diligence sees the job through to the end. It gives you the stick-to-it-ivness you need to keep going when you want to quit.

Patience

Patience is the trait of waiting for the right timing. Patience means you have a large amount of forbearance. You tolerate things with a good attitude. You put up with inconveniences, delays, mishaps, and the many interruptions life hands us with a good attitude.

You need patience when you deal with other people. Your own home is an excellent incubator in which to grow patience. Children must have a sense of responsibility in the area of seeing to it their parents grow in this area. Husbands and wives need patience when learning to get along with each other.

It also takes patience to develop character qualities you are lacking. Don’t be too hard on yourself if you fail, but keep at it. Take the same attitude when learning a new skill or subject.

Moral Courage

Can you stand your ground when faced with criticism, humiliation, gossip, personal loss, or even bodily harm? If so, then you have the trait of moral courage. In order to have moral courage you first have to know what you believe and why. You have to have values and standards in place. Once you know what these are, times will come when you are questioned or tested. It takes courage to stick to your beliefs and not give in to pressure.

Some tests of your courage may be small. Are you able to say “no” when asked to take on duties that are too much for you? Can you get off the phone or computer when you are needed elsewhere? These are great starting places to begin practicing moral courage.

It also takes courage to admit you are wrong. There can be serious consequences to your wrong action, and it will take strength to get your actions out in the open.

Honesty

I doubt many of us are out and out liars since we have been trained to tell the truth, but do you realize that stretching the truth or covering the truth are forms of dishonesty? It is dishonest to conceal facts or embellish them. Usually we think we will suffer in some way if the truth comes out, so we hide the facts. Use your moral courage to be truthful in all things. You will be glad when you have a good conscience toward your Maker and your fellow man.

Chastity

Chastity is sexual pureness in thought and deed. It means to refrain from adultery, fornication, homosexuality or other sexual sins and to guard your mind in this area by avoiding pornography, illicit movies, trashy books, impure thoughts and impure imaginations.

Other Character Traits

The Bible is full of talk of high-quality character traits, things like, graciousness, hospitality, joy, peace, goodness, gentleness, and faith. These are acquired by knowledge and application. Once you know what a trait is, you can begin to apply it in your life. I would like to encourage you to study character qualities of people you admire, then begin to do several things a day to build these qualities within yourself.

Like Finer Femininity on FacebookIphone Jan 7, 2013 035

Our Difficulty in Believing in Providence

Searching for and Maintaining Peaceby Father Jacques Phillipe

10469391_570658939745918_2714105414362297295_n

 

The first obstacle is that, as long as we have not experienced concretely the fidelity of Divine Providence to provide for our essential needs, we have difficulty believing in it and we abandon it.

We have hard heads, the words of Jesus do not suffice for us, we want to see at least a little in order to believe!

Well, we do not see it operating around us in a clear manner. How, then, are we to experience it?
It is important to know one thing: we cannot experience this support from God unless we leave him the necessary space in which he can express himself. I would like to make a comparison.

As long as a person who must jump with a parachute does not jump out into the void, he cannot feel that the cords of the parachute will support him, because the parachute has not yet had the chance to open.

One must first jump and it is only later that one feels carried. And so it is in the spiritual life: “God gives in the measure that we expect of Him,” says St. John of the Cross.

And St. Francis De Sales says: “The measure of Divine Providence acting on us is the degree of confidence that we have in it.”

This is where the problem lies.
Many do not believe in Providence because they’ve never experienced it, but they’ve never experienced it because they’ve never jumped into the void and taken the leap of faith.

They never give it the possibility to intervene.
They calculate everything, anticipate everything, they seek to resolve everything by counting on themselves, instead of counting on God.

The founders of religious orders proceed with the audacity of this spirit of faith. They buy houses without having a penny, they receive the poor although they have nothing with which to feed them. Then, God performs miracles for them. The checks arrive and the granaries are filled.

But, too often, generations later, everything is planned, calculated. One doesn’t incur an expense without being sure in advance to have enough to cover it. How can Providence manifest itself?

And the same is true in the spiritual life.

If a priest drafts all his sermons and his talks, down to the least comma, in order to be sure that he does not find himself wanting before his audience, and never has the audacity to begin preaching with a prayer and confidence in God as his only preparation, how can he have this beautiful experience of the Holy Spirit, who speaks through his mouth?

Does the gospel not say,… Do not worry about how to speak or what you should say; for what you are to say will be given to you when the time comes; because it will not be you who will be speaking, but the Spirit of your Father will be speaking in you (Matthew 10:19)?

Let us be very clear. Obviously we do not want to say that it is a bad thing to be able to anticipate things, to develop a budget or prepare ones homilies. Our natural abilities are also instruments in the hands of Providence!

But everything depends on the spirit in which we do things.

We must clearly understand that there is an enormous difference in attitude of heart between one, who in fear of finding himself wanting because he does not believe in the intervention of God on behalf of those who lean on Him, programs everything in advance to the smallest detail and does not undertake anything except in the exact measure of its actual possibilities, and one who certainly undertakes legitimate things, but who abandons himself with confidence in God to provide all that is asked of him and who thus surpasses his own possibilities.

And that which God demands of us always goes beyond our natural human possibilities!

Like Finer Femininity on Facebook

virgin-mary-5

Hold Fast to Your Faith – Fr. Lasance, My Prayer Book

1280px-Franz_von_Defregger_-_Grace_Before_Meal

My Prayer-Book (Happiness in Goodness)

A father who was totally destitute of faith sent his children to be educated in Catholic establishments.

A friend, having remarked to him upon the inconsistency of his conduct, he replied: “I know only too well, by my own experience, the misery of unbelief, and I am not so cruel a parent as to permit my dear children to feel the same.”

So great then is the wretchedness of unbelief! Listen to these words, and mark them well, proceeding as they do from the lips of an unbeliever.

Therefore guard against the dangers which may threaten your faith. Let me point out these dangers to you.

In the first place, doubts of the faith. If such doubts occur to you, do not dwell upon them, do not strive to solve them, but in all simplicity and humility say: “O my God, I believe this, because Thou hast said it, and because Thou art eternal Truth.”

If doubts which you cannot answer are brought before you by others, simply say: “I cannot explain this, but one thing I know:
God and His holy Church can never err. You had better consult a priest; he will be able to answer you.”

And if you should yourself be troubled with doubts of the faith, tell them simply and frankly to your director or confessor and he will advise you as to the best method of setting them at rest.

Avoid, as far as possible (and this is the second point), the society of those who deny the truths of religion and scoff at faith, the sacraments, and so on.

If they are your equals and among the number of your acquaintances to whom you can speak plainly, cut them short with some such words as these: “May I ask you not to talk in this way, for, if you persist in doing so, this must be the last time I shall have anything to do with you.”

Do not argue with such persons, but say quite simply: “Are you wiser than the Catholic Church and almighty God Himself?”

If they are persons to whom you cannot speak in this way, observe an expressive silence, and thus show your displeasure; or adroitly turn the conversation to a different subject.

Under such circumstances it is a great advantage to possess a ready tongue, for those who have this gift can often, by some appropriate speech, silence the scoffer at once and forever.

I formerly knew a witty Capuchin monk who frequently employed this method, as the following amusing incident may serve to show:

Upon one occasion a remarkably corpulent gentleman who was traveling in the same railway coach as the good Father, tried to make him angry by mocking at religion.

Among other things he said: “How can there be a hell? Where could the
Lord get the immense masses of fuel which would be required in order to heat it?”

The Capuchin, who was very quick at repartee, instantly retorted:
“My dear sir, pray set your mind at rest on this point, for as long as the Almighty has a store of such fat fellows, such ‘blocks,’ as you, He will be at no loss to find what he wants.”

In the third place, beware of reading books and pamphlets hostile to the faith or which attack the Church.

Above all things guard against an inordinate craving in the matter of reading, and do not fancy that you must read everything which comes in your way.

There are unfortunately many books, periodicals, newspapers, etc., in which the teachings of the Catholic Church, or faith in general, arc more or less openly attacked, and in which shameless falsehoods, calumnies, and misrepresentations in regard to her ministers are given to the public.

If once you harbor the thought that if there were no truth at all in such articles they would never have been printed, the most bewildering doubts of the faith might arise in your mind.

Such doubts might be like poisonous seed, from which the accursed weeds of unbelief might spring up.

In conclusion, pay no heed to the false and foolish assertion that every religion is good, every system of beliefs can lead to heaven.

A pious mistress had a servant who very often talked in this way. The first time her wages were due the lady paid her in base coin or money which had been withdrawn from circulation.

The girl objected, but her mistress replied: “But it’s money just the same, and don’t you think all money is equally good?”

She then counted out genuine coins, saying as she did so: “Just as false money will not serve your purpose, so a false creed will never take you to heaven.”

Therefore hold fast to your faith, as being the only true one and the only one which can take you to heaven. Christ established but one Church.

true religion

 

Purity is Beautiful – Fr. Lovasik

The following is a post to urge those who are in the single state to fight hard to retain their their purity during courtship. It is so important to preserve purity before marriage…and always!!

DSC_0220

Purity Is Beautiful

From Clean Love in Courtship by Father Lovasik

Faith tells you that the use of sexual powers according to the will of God is something beautifully sacred, but the exercise of that same power in any way whatsoever outside of marriage is a desecration; just as the Mass itself is the most glorious thing in the world when said by a true priest, but is sacrilege of the worst kind when some imposter goes through the same ceremonies.

The Christian attitude towards the body is one of great reverence —reverence for something our Lord wishes to be sacred.

Your body is your soul’s helpmate in its quest for God. St. Paul says, “Your bodies are members of Christ – . . you are Christ’s.” For all these reasons you cannot use your body as an instrument of sin. That body is destined to rise with Christ in glory.

At Communion Jesus plants in it anew the seed of the Resurrection. Your body is a temple of the Holy Ghost, for God dwells in your soul through sanctifying grace. That temple should never be desecrated by sin.

Chastity is the moral virtue that controls the expression of the sexual appetite. In the unmarried it excludes all voluntary expression of the sexual appetite for sexual pleasure. Unchastity is grievously wrong because its evil lies in the use of a faculty outside the purpose and plan of God and nature.

The faculty of sex has been bestowed upon man primarily for the propagation of the race. It is to be used only in the family and not for the benefit of the individual; otherwise it is a grievous crime against nature, and abuse of a noble faculty, a violation of God’s holy law.

The virtue of purity is beautiful and most pleasing to God. The angels have no need to fight impurity. Man must wage war against the sins of the flesh, and if he remains pure in the face of these temptations, he becomes greater than the angels.

Love purity as a great treasure and the fairest adornment of your soul. Let the desire for complete sinlessness get into your bloodstream. It will have beneficial influence on your whole character, giving you a sense of self-control, a confidence that will enable you to look the world straight in the eye. You will command respect of others.

That, is the reason why a decent young man really respects the young woman who quietly refuses to be “pawed over” and “necked”; he wants a wife who has kept pure. A decent girl breathes a sigh of relief when she finds that a young man respects her as a human being, as a friend, and as a lady.

There is nothing so beautiful and so powerful as virtuous loveliness. Riches, high position, physical beauty—none of these entrances as does sinlessness. Self-control, purity, exalts the soul while preserving it from defilement.

A clean heart is a happy heart. Chastity imparts a beauty and loveliness entirely distinct from mere natural perfection of feature and grace of body.

In the exercise of chastity you need not be prudish or be on the lookout for evil. On the contrary, your virtue, sustained by the Sacraments and prayer, will become your protector from vice.

Guarded by the innocence of your life and the prudent exercise of modesty and dignity, you can meet your friends and enjoy their companionship in a wholesome and unaffected manner.

On the other hand,the vice of impurity is ugly. It is a tyrant. Once you surrender to it, you will find that it will eat away your ideals of moral goodness and will make you afraid of the open.

It will breed selfishness of the worst kind. It will weaken your will and make your reason a slave to mere physical instincts, when it should be their master.

God hates impurity because it is an ugly vice; God loves purity because it is a beautiful virtue, a reflection of His own infinite beauty and sinlessness.

Impurity Is Forbidden

The Natural Law Forbids Impurity.

God has stamped this law upon our very being and it is expressed by our conscience and a feeling of shame when we are guilty. To seek indulgence in the sex appetite without regard to its purpose, namely, bringing children into the world, is a crime against nature and the lowering of ourselves to a level below that of a beast.

This purpose is lawfully sought in the state appointed by God, and that is the married state. The soul and reason must rule the body and its animal appetites. The man who thinks sensual pleasures an end in themselves to be sought quite lawfully whenever desired will himself end in a corrupt heart, an enfeebled mind, and a paralyzed will, his whole character ruined. He is a slave of the devil!

God’s Moral Law Forbids Impurity.

Chastity is a virtue, and impurity is a vice. God forbids this vice in the sixth and ninth commandments: “Thou shalt not commit adultery.” “Thou shalt not covet thy neighbor’s wife.”

Christ Forbids Impurity.

“Whosoever shall look upon a woman to lust after her, has already committed adultery with her in his heart.” (Matt. 5, 28.)“If thy right eye scandalize thee (is an occasion of sin to you), pluck it out and cast it from thee.

For it is expedient for thee that one of thy members should perish, rather than thy whole body be cast into hell. And if thy right hand scandalize thee, cut it off, and cast it from thee; for it is expedient for thee that one of thy members should perish, rather than that thy whole body go into hell.” Blessed are the pure of heart, for they shall see God.” (Matt. 5, 8).

✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿✿

A few years back we had a wonderful priest come and talk at our Traditional Family Weekend about courtship, purity, etc. Our good friend, Rob Heschmeyer, thankfully recorded that sermon. We listen to it periodically with the kids and pass it on to those who have never listened to it.

Here is the link to the sermon. Gather your young adults around, make some popcorn and listen up! It is a fantastic privilege to have such sermons available!

Untitled

79fe10959d79436559a8d09009729dfa

Creativity for Your Winter Blues

Have those January/February “Blahs” begun to rear their ugly heads? Do you feel a lack of spirit and vitality??

NOW is the time to take up a craft, do something creative!! It helps us get over these winter months as we await the arrival of……SPRING!!!!!

This is what I am presently working on:

IMG_0514

12644666_1674253592814439_2713377963724519643_nIMG_0520

 

It took me a while to actually get started but I forced myself. I didn’t get a gown made for Jeanette’s first baby…..so since she is expecting her second in June, and she wanted one so very much….I picked up the crochet needle once again!

IMG_0002

Virginia left her flower basket here yesterday so I couldn’t resist a couple of pictures of one of her ribbon flowers:

IMG_0566 IMG_0567

 

And here is a picture of Margy’s latest painting:IMG_0546

 

Here is a throwback I thought you might enjoy to give you some encouragement on getting those creative juices flowing:

I’ve said it before…..I love creativity. :)

I watch it grow in my children and I see the satisfaction in their eyes of something beautiful being produced from their own hands and their creative imaginations.

Being creative is a healthy outlet, it gives them a sense of worth and it makes them happy. It also demands of them discipline. When the project is no longer “fun”, they must persevere until the end to get the satisfaction they are striving for.

I notice, too, that they are most often making their creations for other people. So it is also a form of selflessness. The hours spent on a project, with someone else in mind, is a generous act on the part of the child.

Two years ago, for Christmas, our oldest son, Sep, came over with his family bearing a gift that took two men to carry. It took our breath away and will always be part of the decor in our home! It was a chess table made out of a cedar tree that they had cut down. The actual chess board is a piece of limestone that they laid into the stump and stained with the familiar squares of a chess board. He even made a lid for it with a knot from the tree as a focal point.

It is so beautiful and a testimony of his creative talent! It took many hours with a chainsaw, a saws-all and a chisel.Daddys chess table 004 tweety's pics 2-12-13 301 - Copy tweety's pics 2-12-13 304 - Copy

Creativity can be born out of necessity, too.  I remember watching my son, Dominic, make a log splitter out of a bunch of metal parts. It was surprising to see something practical emerge from a bunch of scrap metal. It was an odd looking hunk-of-junk but it served the purpose and I truly was amazed at how it worked.

Or how about this old cliche, “Laziness is the mother of invention”.  Another time, when Dominic was tired of milking the cow by hand, he rigged up all the pieces to go with the little machine we had on hand and before you knew it, we had a handy-dandy little milking machine. He then announced to the girls that they were now milking the cow as it was so easy. He was on to bigger and better things……

So creativity can be born of a practical necessity or it can just be an artistic expression. It is something special because we have made it with our own hands.

Something of our own does not mean it needs to be completely original, but something that we have poured ourselves into using our God-given abilities.

Oftentimes we need to start by copying  from other others who have gone before us and eventually our own expression is made more apparent in the things we are creating.

When I started crocheting, I followed patterns right down to the stitch. I was creating and it was so much fun! As time went on and I kept practicing I was able to add my own touches, correct mistakes by using my own ingenuity and make some of my own patterns. It took time….but eventually more creative juices began to flow and I was able to come up with touches that showed more originality.
It is in our nature to create. Creativity is a part of happiness and success in this life. Creative people are interesting people.

Some people complain that they are not creative and they say that other people are just born with the gift of creativity. I do not believe that. It is true, creativity expresses itself in different ways by different people, but everyone has some kind of ingenuity just waiting to be explored.

My oldest daughter Virginia is creative in the way that we think of creativity. She crochets the most beautiful things…doilies, booties, bonnets…and she sews lovely dresses, skirts, vests, etc.gin's pics 052-1gin's pics 050gin's pics 047gin's pics 021-1gin's pics 066-1

My daughter Theresa always said those things bored her to tears. But she is innovative in other ways. Her baking and cooking skills are exceptional and she is the one that organizes the parties around here. She uses her creativity in thinking of ways to help others and make their day brighter. Her flower arranging and interior decorating skills definitely give evidence of her ingenuity.Christmass 08 020

Easter 2011 274-001

We are all born with creativity but often times throughout life it is either left to grow stagnant or it is squelched because of the negative influences in our lives. But we do not have to give into that. We can begin again if our creativity has laid dormant.We just need to spark that enthusiasm. With access to the internet like we have today, Youtube and Pinterest provide many opportunities to whet our crafting appetites.

When we are working on our projects,  we oftentimes want to see the results very quickly. This is where the perseverance and discipline come in that I mentioned earlier. We have to be patient with our creative outlets.

I remember the first baptismal gown that I crocheted with crochet thread. It was very tedious and I ended up ripping the first part out eight times. Every day I put on my list that I would do two rows of crocheting. I was very busy at that time but I was looking at the end result when the project had become tedious. Since then I have crocheted five of those baptismal gowns. They will become heirloom gowns for my children and their children and it was well worth pushing through the blah times!baptismal gown 001-001 baptismal gown 004
This little excerpt is from Motherhood and Family by Miss Carol Houselander:

Art is Communion

When the artist, child or man, makes an image, not to what he fears, but of what he loves – his art is more than communication, it is communion with others. It is the means by which he gives the wonder of his inward self to other people, and when they respond to him by delighting in the thing he has made, it is because it also expresses that which was inarticulate in their own souls. In the thing of beauty made by a man’s hands, the thing into which he has put his own life, other men recognize the secrets of their own inward lives.

…..We have seen that art, making things, above all making one’s own image and likeness, is a means of liberating and healing, and a means to communion. It teaches a child that basic lesson of life, the secrets of his own nature, that he is made in the likeness of God and in the pattern of Christ, and that in order to be happy through his humanity, he must live in the way that satisfies the needs, not of a cog in a machine, but of a man indwelt by God.”

A wise Mrs. Pearl said:

“Homeschooling mamas are almost always in a hurry. Hurry and creativity cannot sit in the same seat. Stationing a baby or toddler in a puddle of warm sunshine that is pouring through the window, where he can stack blocks, paper, and various objects, is a simple, soothing creative afternoon activity. Letting children play in the dirt, making roads, bridges, lakes, and buildings is creating the next generation of builders and makers.

Sitting down in front of electronic media is killing their genius and dumbing them down.  Consider this: any project that they get involved in – whether it be music, painting, mud building, writing, storytelling, stacking, making tents, performing plays, making cameras, or whatever – that result in someone being able to say, ‘Wow, that is interesting, what are you going to do next?’ is creativity.”

Your children need to be encouraged to be creative!

Like Finer Femininity on Facebookteal_parchment_paper_background_1800x1600

An Infallible Recipe – Plain Talks on Marriage

From Plain Talks on Marriage by Rev. Fulgence Meyer, O.F.M., 1927

What, then, is the recipe of happiness for a married person? It is contained in the words of my text: “Blessed are all they that fear the Lord.”

This is the recipe given by God Himself. If anyone knows the way to true and lasting happiness, it is the Lord Who created our heart and gave it its vehement and incessant craving for happiness. He condenses the whole manner of achieving happiness in the words I have quoted.

All other recipes of happiness, divergent from this one, no matter by whom they have been or are given, are false and misleading.

There is but one way for a Catholic couple to become thoroughly and permanently happy, and that one way is the fear of the Lord.

How does a Catholic couple practice and manifest the fear of the Lord?

First of all by worshiping God faithfully. They say their prayers every morning and evening. In their home, which is duly blessed, they pray aloud with the family before and after meals; this, too, when guests are present, let them be Catholics or not. Grace at table always makes a good impression on company worth having.

2523964427_family_saying_grace_1_1_answer_1_xlarge

Family Prayer

Outside of their personal prayers, which should by all means include the daily examination of conscience and an act of perfect contrition, Catholic parents will see to it, that the family recite a certain prayer in common, called family prayer.

Not only is each individual member of the family expected to pray, but the family as such should in concert worship God and consecrate itself to Him afresh every day.

Father and Mother and all the children kneel down before the family crucifix and recite together the rosary, or a litany, or some other prayers as a homage of the family towards the Lord.

The best time to perform this prayer will usually be immediately after supper before the family disbands or retires. The prayer need not be long – it should not be so long as to weary and bore the children – but it should be said regularly and constantly by the entire family.

Nothing is more apt to keep the spirit of God and of faith in a family, and to assure it of the Lord’s continual blessing and protection than this family prayer.

And nothing will be more likely to guarantee the perseverance of all the family members in the true Church than this family prayer.

Your children will not remain with you long. Soon they will disperse into various directions. They will be assailed by all kinds of temptations against virtue and religion, and they may for a time grow lukewarm and careless in the practice of their holy faith.

But if in their childhood and youth they were held to take part in the daily family prayer, the remembrance of it, when with father and mother and brothers and sisters they dedicated themselves to God anew from day to day, will haunt them persistently, and give them no rest until they return again to the faith of their fathers and its regular and conscientious practice.

If, therefore, you have not yet introduced family prayer into your home, do it at once. St. Augustine says, that every Christian home is a little parish for itself. The parents are the priests, and the children the members of the parish.

It behooves priests to guide their parishes particularly in prayer; parents have the same office in their homes; and wherever it is well done, it invariably proves to be their most grateful and productive office.

The best time to start this family prayer is at the very beginning of married life.

catholic home

10805559_941716875855905_4959138750037333827_n

 

Dress – Light and Peace, Quadrupani

11057860_430739510435917_6181335458930271053_n

This excerpt is from the wonderful little book written in the 1890’s:

Light and Peace: Instructions for Devout Souls to Dispel Their Doubts

1. Clothing is worn for a threefold object: to observe the laws of propriety, to protect our bodies from the inclemency of the weather, and, finally, to adorn them, as Saint Paul says, with modesty and sobriety.

This third end is, as you see, not less legitimate than the other two, provided you are careful to make it accord with them by confining it within proper limits and not permitting it to be the only one to which you attach any importance, so that neither health nor propriety be sacrificed to personal appearance.

2. External ornamentation should correspond with each one’s condition in life. A just proportion in this matter, says Saint Thomas, is an offshoot of the virtues of uprightness and sincerity, for there is a sort of untruthfulness in appearing in garments that are calculated to give a wrong impression as to the position in which God has placed us in this world.

3. Be equally careful, then, to avoid over-nicety and carelessness in respect to matters of toilet.

Excessive nicety sins against moderation and Christian simplicity; negligence, against the order that should govern certain externals in human society.

This order requires that each one’s material life, and accordingly his attire which is a part of it, be suitable to his rank and condition; that Esther be clad as a queen, Judith as a woman of wealth and position; Agar as a bond-woman.

5. I shall not speak of immodest dress, for these instructions being intended for pious persons or for those who are endeavoring to become such, it would seem unnecessary.

Nevertheless, as some false and pernicious ideas on this subject prevail in the world and lead into error souls desirous to do right, here are some fundamental principles that can serve you as a rule and save you from similar mistakes.

5. A generally admitted custom can and even should be followed in all indifferent matters; but no custom, however universal it may be, can ever have the power to change the nature and essence of things or render allowable that which is in itself indecent and immodest.

Were it otherwise, many sins could be justified by the sanction they receive in fashionable society.

Remember, therefore, that the sin of others can never in the sight of God authorize yours, and that where it is the fashion to sin it is likewise the fashion to go to hell. Hence it rests with yourself whether you prefer to be saved with the few or to be damned with the many.

me -spring - 2zxCQ-K2mK - print

A Gallery and The Winner Is…….

I thought you would enjoy these pictures of our very fun Winter Family Dance shared with good, Catholic friends!!

Our dance is a FAMILY dance. Everyone, from Grandpa and Grandma down to Baby and Toddler is welcome at our dance. We visit, we snack, we sit and listen to the music….and a lot of us dance!

Our dances are not “do your own thing” dances. We have square dances, line dances, polkas, children’s dances, etc. There are a few Traditional Western Swings and a few Waltzes.

Our dress code is strict. Anyone that comes into our dances with a less-than-modest outfit won’t feel comfortable.

So….it is a FAMILY AFFAIR.

And if you would like to take part in our next one, which will be part of our whole Traditional Family Weekend, block off your calendar now!! It will be the Weekend of July 15 – 17th, 2016.

There will be a dance, conferences by FSSP priests, a High Mass, a Talent Show, Volleyball, Board Games, a Family Movie….and just real good fellowship.

That being said, here is a video of the Children’s Train Dance led by our son-in-law, Devin and our daughter, Theresa and their little family. And following the video is the gallery. Click on the first picture to view the gallery.

And after you view the pictures, etc.,  check to see who won the Rosary Bracelet and the Ginjen Flower Accessory by scrolling to the end of the post……okay you can do that first!! :D

IMG_0038 IMG_4993 IMG_0021

Thank you to all for entering the drawing!!

The Winner of the Rosary Bracelet and the Flower Accessory is……..

TEENYWEENY58!!

Congratulations! I will send you an email for your snail mail address! :)

Purity in Company-Keeping

 

Michael and Jeanett's engagement pics 043

From Clean Love in Courtship by Father Lovasik

Marriage is Sacred

Marriage is a serious life-long career, ordained by God for the highest possible natural functions. God considers this contract of marriage to be so important that He made it a sacrament. Through this sacrament grace is conferred upon the contracting parties for the proper exercise of their duties towards each other and towards their children, and for the furtherance of their happiness in the family.

The primary purpose of marriage is the bringing of children into the world. Its secondary purposes are mutual help of husband and wife in the care of the family and the allaying of concupiscence or the desires of nature.

Marriage makes it possible for one to cooperate with God in the creation of life. It is the privilege of a father and a mother to be instruments that God uses to bring into the world children made in His own image and likeness, children with immortal souls, children whose destiny it is to be God’s children in this world and in the next.

Though marriage has its difficulties and responsibilities, it also has its tremendous God-given rewards: love and all that love means to human life; the beauty and joy of marital relationship; children, who bless and cement the union of the parents’ hearts.

Since marriage is beautifully sacred, so should be the courtship that precedes it. Your courtship must be pure if it is to be happy; and pure and happy, it will provide the test of character that is necessary for a blessed and a happy marriage.

Only too frequently an improper courtship results in an unhappy marriage. You will trace your broken heart and wretched life to your failure to realize the difference between love and lust in courtship.

The Danger in Personal Sex Attraction

Sex attraction in God’s plan begins normally with adolescence. During the formative years immediately afterward it serves the purpose of uniting boys and girls together in wholesome social activities. It enables them to get a proper appreciation of one another, showing their mutual dependence on, and mutual power over each other.

This is general sex attraction. Once sufficient maturity is reached, personal sex attraction follows. It differs from ordinary friendship and has a God-given purpose, namely, to attract and lock the hearts of two persons together so that each craves a complete oneness with the other.

This desire to blend and share their entire lives is a perfect inducement to marriage. But this type of sex attraction can easily prove a serious danger to your chastity because of the natural urge you have of expressing your love by kissing and embracing.

In the beginning there might appear to be no danger at all because you would not think of any immodest show of affection. Nevertheless, you are emotionally thrilled just to be with this particular person who attracts you in a very special way.

This emotional state is heightened by caresses, and physical passion is very easily aroused. Physical passion cannot be the aim of unmarried people in expressing their love. Never forget the weakness of human nature!

Ever since Adam fell, the appetites of the senses are no longer under the perfect command of reason. In order to subject these appetites, you must exert relentless effort and call upon the grace of God.

Young women should remember that they are generally not so strongly tempted through concupiscence as are men. The young man reacts quickly to stimulation, and such reactions bring with them an urge to just a little more intimacy, which very quickly means an urge to immodesty. If these urges are not controlled, the result is sin.

A young woman, however, will very likely react less quickly in a physical way, though there is always a danger that emotion will cross the line into physical passion even in her case.

But an even graver danger for her is that when her love is strongly stirred by marks of affection, she will yield to her friend’s urges rather than offend him or lose him. When the fires of passion are once enkindled, a natural craving for self-surrender often overpowers her.

This is the danger to chastity that is inherent in personal sex attraction. Therefore, the impulses of personal and physical attraction, namely, the attraction of body to body, should be held in check.

After marriage physical attraction has its place and is the full blossoming of the human sexual instinct. Sex is only then an aid to human perfection and a means of sanctifying and saving your soul if it conforms with the holy law of God.

IMG_0034

IMG_7966

Make a comment on this post to join in on the Give-Away January 29th!

IMG_0038IMG_0021

 

I Give Up!

IMG_3820

Disclaimer   :)

Marriage is difficult. The daily irritations that rub, like sandpaper, can cause wounds that make it hard to love and respect the one who you are called to do just that…..love and respect.

Oh sure, we’ve picked up the books. We’ve made a few changes here and there. Things seemed to get better, then something hits the fan, and we are right back where we started. Round and round it goes. We’re tired of it! We want to just throw up our hands and say, “I give up! I am going to just shut down, live my life and he can live his!”

This is a temptation. Do you remember what St. Paul says? “I have run the race, I have fought the good fight.”  I don’t think he meant to say “I have fought the good fight until I just couldn’t take it anymore” or “I have run the race…. until I got tired…nobody was paying attention and it didn’t seem to make a difference!”

Nope, we must never give up. I know that the struggles women have are very real. How do I know? Because I am a wife. I was raised in the city, my hubby is a country guy, I am a melancholic/sanguine, hubby is a choleric. On yes, and I forgot, he is a man, I am a woman. HUGE DIFFERENCES! It is not easy….. Our Lord never said it would be. :P

You say you do your part, he doesn’t do his. You make the changes, he just stays grumpy and ill-tempered.  You are the only one working on this relationship and he doesn’t care…..he’s not making any changes himself! You say, “I give up!”

I listened to a podcast recently. It was from the “Respect and Love” site.
Mr. Eggerich said in it that “you must be married to one pretty bad dude if he does not respond to you being more respectful and loving to him”.

It is true, there are a small percentage of men who are narcissistic and on the other hand, there are women who are divas. This situation can be very difficult because they just don’t see outside themselves.
BUT, if you are married to a regular guy, with regular faults, it is hard for me to believe that he will not respond to your efforts, if you are truly trying to change.

Remember, we can’t change him, we must accept and respect him. We must recall the things we loved about him when we first knew him. Sit down and write those things out. Make the effort, even if it doesn’t seem like it will help. God is not outdone in generosity! He will meet you more than halfway!

We should never give up seeking for ways to make our relationship better. It is what we are called to do.

So do not give up the good fight….run the race until the finish line! Be humble, search for answers.
Read the right books, talk to the right people. Do not talk to those who are giving you bad advice (and there are lots of those out there). They do much damage as they fan the fires of self-pity within ourselves. That is straight from the devil.

Yes, I know the struggles are real. The solutions are, too, if we keep looking and striving. It may not be overnight, but, in time, you will see that your perseverance has paid off!

062Colorful-Aurora-Pinkish-background-picture-widescreen-wallpaper-2560x1920-15-507f91a9c54a8-9705

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 172 other followers