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How the Child Must be Made Acquainted With the Supernatural Order

13 Wednesday Jan 2021

Posted by Leanevdp in Parenting, True Womanhood, A book of Instruction for Women of the World, Rev. Bernard O'Reilly, L.D., 1893

≈ 1 Comment

From True Womanhood, Rev. Bernard O’Reilly, 1893

HOW THE CHILD MUST BE MADE ACQUAINTED WITH THE SUPERNATURAL ORDER

To inculcate on her children, as soon as their reason begins to dawn, that God is not only their Maker as He is that of the heavens above them and the earth around them, but also to them a true Father, who cares for them and gives them a right to the most magnificent of all inheritances, must be one of the Christian mother’s early cares.

Her own sense of piety, her womanly wit and instinctive knowledge of child-nature will teach her the best methods to be employed in order to let in by degrees, and one after the other, the beautiful and divine realities of the supernatural order,—of that kingdom of God, whose sovereign is true Father to us,—of that glorious world in which Christ and His Blessed Mother are central figures.

There are few households so poor but they can afford to have one or two sweet prints representing the mysteries of our Lord’s infancy and childhood, as well as a handsome crucifix, or, at least, a good print of the crucifixion.

It is well to reject the abominable daubs published in our large cities and “misrepresenting” every subject they profess to set before the devout mind.

The sweet pictures of the Blessed Mother and her Babe by Luini, or Fra Bartolomeo, and Crucifixions by such religious painters as Velasquez, cannot fail to produce a powerful impression.

There are good engravings of them, for which it would be well to pay a little more;—good chromos, like those published in London by the Arundel Society, are, unfortunately, beyond the reach of poor families.

Would that we had both in city and country parishes some sodality interested in seeing that the homes of the laboring classes were provided with such objects of religious art as would inspire reverence and piety in the beholder.

Nor must mothers forget to have a little statue or a print of the Angel Guardian; he is a friend to be known and loved early. It must be the part of the judicious mother to explain in due time to her little ones, when they are able to inquire about that heavenly Woman and her Babe, what relation they both bear to us.

Some mothers, we know, have in their nurseries “The Flight into Egypt” or the “Adoration of the Magi,” subjects which will naturally oblige the children to inquire about the birth of the Divine Babe, and the whole story of his birth.

When, precisely, parents can draw the affection of the child-mind to the story of the Passion, and the Crucifix, they alone can determine.

Some are averse to doing so before children are a little more advanced in years. Certain it is that they should be made acquainted with the sufferings of our Divine Benefactor before they emerge from childhood.

This point of time being left to the judgment of mothers, let us be firmly convinced that of all the vehicles of supernatural instruction and solid piety there is no one more efficacious than THE CRUCIFIX.

The Crucifix in Catholic households is not only the most eloquent and instructive of books for youth and old age; but it can also be made to speak divinely to the sense of childhood.

Children are all athirst for knowledge once they begin to speak and to be capable of instruction by word of mouth. Their mind and imagination are forcibly impressed by the figure of the Man of Sorrows nailed to the bitter tree.

They are quick to seize the reverence, the love, the worship with which a mother or a nurse looks upon this pregnant story of Love Crucified. Who is He? What brought Him there? What is He to us? What we owe Him, hope, and fear from Him, are lessons which a child may soon learn,—for they are questions which arise in his own mind, and to which he is impelled to seek an answer by a Prompter within him.

For Christian mothers should not forget that in the infant soul dwells the Divine Spirit, communicated in baptism, and never expelled thence save by voluntary mortal sin.

In the soul of every mother, too, who is in a state of grace, dwells the same Divine Instructor, prompting her to do her duty by her child, and pledged to aid her in her work.

“We’re terribly in danger all the time of taking God’s goodness too much for granted; of bouncing up to Communion as if it were the most natural thing in the world, instead of being a supernatural thing belonging to another world.” – Msgr. Ronald Knox, 1948

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To the modern mind, the concept of poverty is often confused with destitution. But destitution emphatically is not the Gospel ideal. A love-filled sharing frugality is the message, and Happy Are You Poor explains the meaning of this beatitude lived and taught by Jesus himself. But isn’t simplicity in lifestyle meant only for nuns and priests? Are not all of us to enjoy the goodness and beauties of our magnificent creation? Are parents to be frugal with the children they love so much?

For over half a century, Catholic families have treasured the practical piety and homespun wisdom of Mary Reed Newland’s classic of domestic spirituality, The Year and Our Children. With this new edition, no longer will you have to search for worn, dusty copies to enjoy Newland’s faithful insights, gentle lessons, and delightful stories. They’re all here, and ready to be shared with your family or homeschooling group. Here, too, you’ll find all the prayers, crafts, family activities, litanies, and recipes that will help make your children ever-mindful of the beautiful rhythm of the Church calendar.

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Merry Christmas! 2020

24 Thursday Dec 2020

Posted by Leanevdp in Advent/Christmas, Smorgasbord 'n Smidgens

≈ 11 Comments

Well, here we are, it is Christmas Eve. This year has been harder for most but we have still arrived at the same place as last year….awaiting the coming of Our Savior in anticipation and expectant joy!

The Advent season has quickly passed (seems quicker each year!), and we have had many, many joys along the way.

The girls have been practicing for choir and will be singing at Midnight Mass and at 9:00 a.m. High Mass. They will be tired but happy (unless they really mess up a song or two, in which case they will obsess for the day until their family comes over for dinner to distract them).

We have four children at home….Rosie, Hannah, Gemma and Angelo. They are busy and our lives are full.

Rosie (second from the left) is our “driven” daughter. She is always accomplishing something and can’t resist doing the next thing on her list even though she should be taking a break. She sings in the choir, is always baking something “Keto”, diligently looks after the yard (doing landscaping and cleaning it….urging her dad to get his “junk” out of it). She works for her sister, for an elderly lady and then paints with her dad and brothers 3 days a week. She struggles with headaches every day. We are still looking for answers for her health problems.

Hannah (to the right of the groom) is our mild-mannered, sensitive one. She is a teacher’s aid for her sister, Gin, who has a wonderful teacher/tutor come in to school her children. She does that 2 days a week and then works for her other sisters another day of the week. She finally got her license and bought a minivan from her brother. It was his work van (and looked like it) and the price was right. Hannah cleaned it up and bought sunflower (bright ones!) seat covers for it…now it feels like her own instead of an old paint van! She has taken up crocheting and is still diligently working on last-minute gifts for Christmas! She is sweet and kind and children love her.

Gemma (far right) is vivacious, precocious and has an excellent sense of humor…always making us laugh…when she isn’t making us cry! She loves to read books and to write letters. She takes violin and piano lessons. She is self-motivated and practices faithfully. She was VERY disappointed when their (hers and Hannah’s) Chartres Pilgrimage in France was canceled last May due to Covid. This year isn’t looking that great, either. She is our political activist and urges us regularly to pray, do sacrifices, go to rallies, etc., for the betterment of our great nation!

Angelo (back row, left) is our gem. He is inventive, good-natured, religious and just a great young man. Oh sure, he has his faults, but in general….what a guy! He is a leader when it comes to his nephews or anyone else that he feels he can influence for good. He published his own journal….The Squires of Don Bosco Journal…for his nephews and he keeps them on track. He is mechanically inclined and has a golf cart and a four wheeler that he bought (fixer uppers). He runs errands for me and for his sisters all the time. He usually does it without complaining…though he has his moments.  🙂   He is hoping to start his own lawn business in the spring.

Vincent (hubby) works very hard each day. He has always been a physically very hard worker and it is catching up to him but he does not complain. He remains in a good mood and tends to always look on the bright side of things. He has started to raise rabbits and is quite enamored with them right now. His little greenhouse has been converted to a rabbit haunt. He has hooked up all the waterers and has neat little cages built to separate them. It’s nice to see his excitement.

I am busy and love it. After my Covid, I have felt better than ever (though my taste and smell refuse to return). I am almost done a new Maglet…on parenting. I was hoping to get it done for Christmas but the virus knocked that out of me. I have been doing most of the cooking again, and I am, in general, enjoying it. I also have been on Keto with Rosie and I do Intermittent Fasting (although since I’ve been sick, I have slacked with that one…hoping to get back to it soon). I have lost 20 pounds and feel much better. I take care of my sister since Mom is gone. This is our first Christmas without her….

As you must know, one of my passions is this website. Thank you for your support, I truly hope your Christmas is a time of rejuvenation, peace and joy!

Below are photos of our couples. Colin & Z and Sep & Molly are not included. Hoping to post later….

Vin and Gin with Edward, Tony, Benjamin, Johnathan, Emma, Nathan, Juliette, Peter and Anne Marie

Devin and Theresa with Brendan, Sienna, Adrian, Avila and Adam

Dominic and Sarah with Rita, Augustine and Lucy

Mike and Jeanette with Agnes, Magdalene, Tobias and Elias

David and Margy (our newlyweds)

A Christmas Gallery….

Cookie time at Theresa’s
Grandma Rosalie is right in on the fun!

Some of the finished product….shortbread cookies!

Cookie time at Jeanette’s
Jeanette, Rosie and Margy
Wow! That’s a lot of cookies.

Margy
Cherry flips
Butterhorns

Thumb Prints
Theresa is helping decorate…the branch of lights is caught in her hair…haha
Lots of commotion!

Gemma does the ceiling decorations….
Then notices I’m taking a photo!
Our friend, Sam, is experimenting making his homemade gingerale with a hint of orange.

Cookie baking at home with good friends.
Peter didn’t know what he was in for.
He’s making the best of it.

And takes out his frustration by making a Monster Cookie to scare the kids….
Way to go Peter!

Virignia is packed up and ready to go to the rectory with her family to decorate for the priests!
Decorating at home
Peter and Paul, good friends.

Ernie is visiting from Idaho…and, as usual, causing problems.
Who invited him, anyway!?
Ceiling decorations…

Sunday night potluck

Chatting
Jeanette and Mike
Paul, Dev & Theresa

Dominic insists on doing the dishes!
Colin and Z
Dom and Sarah

The little children make balloon animals with Grandma Rosalie
And then they watch a Christmas cartoon.

Colin’s birthday lands on the 19th. In the past, because it is so close to Christmas, we have kind of forgotten his birthday. We make sure not to do it again!
My beautiful Christmas bouquet from Nettie and Mike.

The top of the piano
Our snowmen…

I bought these lovely homemade icon decorations this year.
Our tree
Gin’s decorations…

Her mantle…
Jeanette’s decorations
Her mess…

Her tree…
Her late risers….
Father Adams in his Santa mode…

Gin’s dresser…decked out for hubby.
Sweet little Anne Marie
Gin’s “fireplace”

Her living room
Yum!
Rosie continues to work on the Spiritual Christmas Crib.

So far…
Joseph and Mary
The donkey…

Provisions….
Bethlehem (drawn by a friend)
Might as well laugh than cry…. hehe

A neat closeup of the “Bethlehem Star” as Saturn and Jupiter pass each other on December 21st.
A photo of the star taken from Italy.
San Miguel de Allende – MEXICO

Prague at Christmas…..Infant of Prague, have mercy on us.
Mary Christ-Mass to all!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Train Your Child in Good Behavior

19 Thursday Nov 2020

Posted by Leanevdp in Parenting

≈ 1 Comment

From How to Raise Good Catholic Children by Mary Reed Newland

Struggling with behavior problems is like darning socks — or rather, the way darning socks used to be. You’d work and work at it until the holes were finally closed, and then one wearing — and, more holes!

That kept up until finally the sock was more darn than sock and you’d whine a little to yourself, wondering who appreciated it anyway. If only they’d stay darned! But they never did, and you were forever starting all over again.

But because God uses the most trivial things to point out the way to perfection, once in a while in the middle of a whine you’d understand that even if no one else saw how much work you put into it, God did.

And every snip and stitch was holy in His sight, because you were working away at the vocation that, for you, was the way to Heaven.

This could be called “detachment in darning”: to darn socks for the love of God.

We have to develop this same kind of detachment if we are to lead our children to detachment in their behavior. They will learn it and apply it with ease to all the beauty and order and blessedness of nature, but it’s infinitely more difficult, and painfully slow, learning to apply it to themselves.

It means learning the same lessons over and over again.

Modern mothers have been relying on psychology books to interpret child behavior for so long now that if all the psychology books were burned to a crisp, few mothers could relax with the conviction that God’s love, the maternal instinct, and divine grace could take their place.

I’m not minimizing the work of child psychologists. They’ve taught us many new insights into the needs and behavior of our children. But God can teach us even more, because children’s willfulness, their disobedience, and their tantrums speak just as eloquently for their own search for God and perfection as our sins do for ours.

What we all — little or big — want is God; if we do not realize it, however, we choose many ignoble things in His place. And if we want to teach children to be good with a goodness that’s lasting, we must teach them to be good for the love of God.

“The many troubles in your household will tend to your edification, if you strive to bear them all in gentleness, patience, and kindness. Keep this ever before you, and remember constantly that God’s loving eyes are upon you amid all these little worries and vexations, watching whether you take them as He would desire. Offer up all such occasions to Him, and if sometimes you are put out, and give way to impatience, do not be discouraged, but make haste to regain your lost composure.”
― St. Francis de Sales

A Parenting sermon for you today….

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Advent is such a special season! And this year, you can make it more meaningful than you ever have!
This Advent journal is for busy moms who need a little help making this season special within the home. It will help you stay on track and be consistent with the customs you have decided to incorporate within your four walls.
I have broken it down into bite-sized tidbits that, when laid out for you, will be easy to accomplish. As you check each item off you will get a sense of fulfillment knowing you are getting done what is truly important in this expectant season! The other things will get done….but first things first!
At midnight, on Christmas Eve, when Baby Jesus arrives, you and your family will look back upon your Advent and sigh with satisfaction, knowing you truly have celebrated with the Church, that you have put your best foot forward in making this a spiritual, enchanting, holy time for all!
The first few pages of this book will have a run-down of the special Advent customs and activities that will be on your checklist each day. They are simple, they are doable.
I hope this Advent is more special than ever as we walk hand-in-hand making the Liturgy come alive in our homes!

Advent Package Special! The Catholic Mother’s Traditional Advent Journal & Celine’s Advent! Available here.

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Raising Girls…My Story

22 Thursday Oct 2020

Posted by Leanevdp in by Leane Vdp, Parenting

≈ 12 Comments

A Thursday Throwback….

How did you raise such wonderful girls?

I’ve been asked that a few times. I can tell you that I sometimes am as surprised as the people who ask me. 🙂 It’s like I just woke up one day and said, “Wow we’ve done okay! How did we do that?”

It’s not that our training wasn’t purposeful…it was. But with human weakness so apparent in our parenting, with imperfect circumstances, etc., it was hard to know the outcome.

And, things are not picture-perfect (it looks so good online, doesn’t it?) My girls are human and have many faults, like all those born under Eve’s lineage.

Also, life is not done yet and I have children at home. Dynamics are different than they used to be so I don’t know the outcome. At this point, though, I am very grateful for how things have transpired.

I’ve tried here to pinpoint along the way some of the things that we did… to actually be able to put them into words….and I do feel I have a few things I can share with you.

It is not to discourage you, though, because some of us have taken up the torch midstream. I was fortunate that I became serious about my faith BEFORE I got married. This is, in many circumstances, not the case. God takes us where we are at and can create a beautiful tapestry of a grace-filled life wherever we begin! He meets us where we are at on our own personal journey and is not outdone in generosity! It is imperative we remember that.

That being said, the following are a few things I think were very important on our own journey. (This is my own list. Hubby would have his own list, too. His contribution in many of these points are unspoken but always there.)


#1.
We were blessed to have started off on the right foot. We both worked at a Catholic Shrine so our courtship was truly amazing! We said the Rosary every day, we went to Mass every day, we went to Benediction every day and a lot of our courtship was during Lent so we were reading the Dolorous Passion of Our Lord Jesus Christ together.

This is obviously not possible for most people but the effort put into our courtship and even before we meet that special someone, the effort meaning: Gaining as much graces as possible through daily Mass, etc. will help to get started on the right foot. So many marriages begin on the wrong foot, stained with serious sin, and I do believe this has a negative impact on the relationship in general.

Once again, if that has been your own experience (not getting started on the right foot), with God’s grace the pieces can be picked up…yes, they can! ❤

#2. My discipline was not as consistent as it could have been. Like you, I was tired, etc. If I was nursing a baby or whatever and the child’s behavior needed tending to, it was a temptation to overlook things….and I did at times. For the most part, though, I did not let my children outright disobey me or say no to me. They never struck me. If they ever tried such things they were swiftly punished.

#3. I taught them to respect their dad. I tried to only talk highly of him to them. Even though I did not always agree with my husband’s ways, my disagreements were kept in check, as much as possible, around the children. I knew it was important to hold a united front  together. The only reason I knew to do that was through the books I had been reading. I didn’t have any experience with this sort of thing in my own young, rather rocky and independent life. If you don’t teach your children to respect their dad, believe me, it will come back to bite you! They will also disrespect you as the years go by. This is not easy, and I failed many times, but I dusted myself off, knew where my mistake was, and began again.

#4. We homeschooled. This was always a challenge and I felt inadequate. But I kept trying and the bond that I formed with my children was irreplaceable. We struggled together each day.  Once again, I do not think it is for everyone. I am just telling you the things that I feel contributed to the girls I have today.

#5. We had joy in our family. We played lots of games. The TV was not the center of our recreation (we didn’t have a TV for the first 15 years of our marriage). My husband and I played volleyball with our kids right up until a couple years ago. Here and there we still get out there with them.  We make movie time (now that we have a TV) a family fun event!

Disclaimer here…Yes, we had joy. But I had my off days, even my off years! One year I got very sick and it was a slow climb out. Was I joyful? No! Days when you are so weary, days when you feel blah, etc. Joy?? You kidding??!

This is the amazing thing….even though I struggled with many things (my melancholic nature is not nice to me at times), the kids don’t remember those off times if you try to keep the tone positive in between times (and hopefully there are many in-between times)!

I knew it was important, that our kids would not want what we have if we didn’t have joy, so joy was fought for. I thought I was failing, I woke up one day to find out I hadn’t failed. Like I said, God meets us more than halfway!

#6. (I had my girls read my list and they wanted me to mention these “Don’ts” that we “Do”).  Our kids didn’t go out of the home for their social time. It was brought to us. When we did go somewhere for a good time, for the most part, it was as a family. They also didn’t spend much time in their rooms…those were for sleeping not for spending time with their friends or hanging out by themselves.

Which brings me to another rule we had…No Sleepovers. It’s easier to make a rule with no exceptions (cousins traveling and spending the night is different…though it was closely monitored, too), than to pick and choose which sleepover events they can take part in. Sleepovers are dangerous times and ones that parents are oblivious to as they are in their beds sawing logs while the girls are chatting away….

Don’t get me wrong, it’s not that we see sin at every corner. We don’t. But we also avoid particular situations that make it easy on the kids to break rules….whether talking about subjects they shouldn’t divulge in with their friends…..Or maybe even worse.

#7. Some Do’s! I worked very hard at trying to make the Faith come alive in our home. We did Saint Nicholas stockings, Lenten practices, Advent practices, we sang hymns at the end of the rosary, we did novenas together, we did little processions, we did special things on Feast Days. We supplied the magic and the charm to our Catholic heritage.

Once again I learned this from the books that I share with you each day. I did not have any experience with this beforehand. And I was not perfect at it. Often it was one week into Advent before I got the wreath out, etc. Or life was so hectic, things were put on the back burner. As the kids got older, though, this consistency became more “on” than “off”.

It paid off. I see my married kids doing the same with their children. They are even more solicitous than I was. It warms the cockles of my heart.

#8. We were open to the friends of my children. We were picky, but we were open. They came over often and took part in our home life. We fed them, they often stopped by the store and picked things up for us for dinner. It was a give-give situation.

I never went to bed until I knew everyone was either gone, or my oldest son at home was left in charge. No one went off to form little groups, everything was done together. We played games with the kids, sang songs, had bonfires.

If any of our girls were of courting age, this is how we got to know the potential suitor and how they got to know us. And believe me, true personalities came out during games!!

#9. We have a strict dress code in our family but we have fun with it. Some of the girls sew, we love pretty colors and flowy, feminine things. The girls make the ribbon flowers to embellish their clothes and hair. We wear colors for the seasons and just enjoy dressing well.

Their clothing is not thought of as a negative thing…what they can’t wear. It’s about the amazing choices and colors and materials we CAN use! And my daughters know they are respected, as women, for the way they dress. In general, they don’t give it too much thought (that we are so different in that aspect from the world), it is just a way of life and always has been.

#10. Our technology is very closely monitored. Only my husband and I know the password to our computer and my phone is always locked. The older girls can look at recipes or something they want to buy on Amazon but it is not in a private place and it is not for long periods of time (which they don’t desire anyway…it is a means to an end for them).

They can ask to look at my phone, my Facebook account, if they wish, it is an open book and I don’t mind. But for the most part, they don’t use the internet much. They are all pretty good typists, though, and they know the basics.

The older girls have flip-phones and texting is not opened up until they are courting. They don’t have smart phones.

Don’t ever think your kids are above looking at stuff they shouldn’t. No, they are curious…especially boys, but girls, too. Be solicitous! We’ve slipped up here and there and I was given a reality check….that the devil is waiting to pounce on my own kids, too!!

#11. The Rosary has been our mainstay throughout the years. When it was forgotten, it wasn’t intentional. See the post My Little Story About the Rosary.

We also went to daily Mass as much as we could. There were many days, months, years, when hubby was working lots of hours, I was nursing or pregnant and homeschooling and it was too much to go to Mass every day. I would go in spurts or try to make it at least one more time a week besides Sunday. We are now back at it but it is easier because I don’t have lots of little people at home.

A couple of years back I was scratching my head wondering how the last half of our kids were going to turn out. Truly, the dynamics have changed around here (not in a bad way…just changed) and I was nervous how this was going to affect the next batch of kids.

As I was digging around for a solution, I came up with one…..Get back to daily Mass! So I have given that quandary (my kids and how they will turn out) right back to Our Lord and I am going to let Him figure it out. He’s doing pretty good! 😀

#12. Our girls have realized right from the get-go what an incredible and awesome “career choice” is Wifehood and Motherhood! They don’t see it as a “dumbing-down”, they see it as a privilege. They are open to life and they look forward to the day their vocation, as a religious sister or a mother, is shown to them so they can dig in! They know their purpose in life.

Therefore, and this is a big THEREFORE,… they are not antsy for college or a career. Their lives are so full, either helping us with our busy lifestyle, at our parish, or, recently, helping with nieces and nephews, etc., that the farthest thing from their mind is to seek a career outside the home!

They stay home until they are married. Life is full…no need to look elsewhere!

My husband and I have tried to show them, and I think we have succeeded, what an awesome thing Catholic Family Life is! It takes work, you need to be counter-cultural, but it all comes with so many blessings!

And my girls see it. They look around at what other girls their age and of the world are doing and they don’t want it. They feel very blessed!

An aside here….This next batch of girls coming up have seen a lot of the struggles of married life and motherhood from their older siblings. They look at it with a little more trepidation….hehe…than my first children. But they will be ready when the time comes, I am confident of that.

Well, there you have the list. Remember….in between each of those numbers should be another part….the part that says we were inadequate and didn’t do it all perfectly or with always the right attitude.

Once again, that should encourage all of us that it can be done….even with our weak humanness!

And, of course, I am not saying our way is THE way. You can pick and choose those things that may help you in your own family.

AND if you have lots of pieces to pick up….look up! God is not wanting in miracles! Miracles that change lives!

We are called to be great Apostles of Love in our ordinary, daily life. We are Christ’s Hands and Feet as we wipe noses, feed hungry little ones and change diapers with an attitude of service and love. When we are cheerful to those we rub shoulders with each day, when we kindly open our door to those who enter into our home, we are taking part in Christ’s Apostolic Work. “Jesus was an Apostle in the stable of Bethlehem, in the shop of St. Joseph, in His anguish in Gethsemane and on Calvary no less than when He was going through Palestine, teaching the multitudes or disputing with the doctors of the law.” – Divine Intimacy, Painting by Morgan Weistling http://amzn.to/2p0dxg8 (afflink)

A beautiful Easter CD sung by a beautiful Benedictine Order of Nuns…Benedictines of Mary, Queen of Apostles.

Available here.

index

💖💙This Maglet is for you, lovely wives, who have dedicated your life to your faith and to your husband.
If it is in God’s providence you bring children into the world, your goal is to raise a wholesome, dedicated Catholic family…in an ungodly world. This is a seemingly insurmountable task considering the obstacles before us.
Our first line of defense is the bond we must have with our husband. Besides our spiritual life, which gives us the grace to do so, we must put our relationship with our husband first. It is something we work on each day.
How do we do this? Many times it is just by a tweaking of the attitude, seeing things from a different perspective. It is by practicing the virtues….self-sacrifice, submission, thankfulness, kindness, graciousness, etc.
The articles in this maglet will help you with these things. They are written by authors that are solid Catholics, as well as authors with old-fashioned values.
Take this information to heart and your life will be filled with many blessings!
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Catholic Wife's Maglet4
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Catholic Wife's Maglet1

book suggestions
Let Mrs. Newland show you how to introduce even your littlest ones to God and develop in your growing children virtues such as:
The habit of regular prayer
Genuine love of the Rosary
A sense of the dignity of work
Devotion to Mary and the saints
A proper love for the things of this world and for the things of Heaven
Attentiveness at Mass
Love for the Eucharist
An understanding and love of purity
The ability to make good confessions
And dozens of other skills, habits, and virtues that every good Catholic child needs

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Tidbits for Your Day

20 Monday Jul 2020

Posted by Leanevdp in Tidbits for Your Day

≈ 1 Comment

We Have a Choice

-Emilie Barnes

If you have been married for any length of time, you realize that your mate is certainly different from yourself.

You may often ask, “Why can’t he [or she] be like me?” The saying around our house is: “Men are weird, and wives are strange.” That is so very true—and God designed us that way!

We are in a real sense “prescription babies” in that God has a custom design for every individual, equipping each for specific achievement and purpose.

As a couple, we can move into our marriage relationship with the confidence that God has put each partner on the earth for a special purpose. As loving mates, our task is to investigate to see what that purpose is and then do all we can to encourage and assist our mates so they can become all that God has planned for them.

We have a choice: We can live in war zones fueled by conflict and frustration or we can live in homes filled with the precious and pleasant riches that come from understanding and accepting our differences.

Make Some Changes, Starting Today!

-Emilie Barnes

•Start with yourself. Find out what causes confusion in your life. Establish your own plan on what changes must be made.
• Keep it simple. Don’t make your plans too complicated.
• Have designated places for everything. Avoid piling up papers, toys, clothes, and so on.
• Store like items together. Designate certain places for specific groups: bills, invoices, coffee/tea items, gardening tools, laundry, and so on.
• Get rid of items you don’t use. If you haven’t used the item in the last year, give it away, throw it away, or have a garage sale.
• Invest in proper tools. Use bins, hooks, racks, containers, lazy Susans to maintain order.
• Keep master lists. Keep an inventory of where things are stored in binders, file cards, a computer, or journals.
• Use labels and signs. Label everything—specific items, drawers, and bins.

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Make Bedtime Special!

-Bob Barnes

Ah, bedtime! The children have played hard, had a filling dinner, taken a warm bath or shower, dressed in their pajamas, and prepared for bed.

This is the relaxing time, the cooling-down period of the day, just before they fall asleep for a good night’s rest.

The easiest thing to do is shuffle them off to bed with a good-night kiss and a possible short “Now I lay me down to sleep” prayer.

But if you hastily put them to bed, you miss an opportunity to establish a great legacy that will last all their lives. You can impart so much in this short period of time.

Whether you sing with the children, pray, or share a story, you are creating very special memories in those children’s lives.

Discipline

-Marva Collins

When you must reprimand your child, do so in a loving manner. Don’t ever try to degrade or humiliate him. His ego is a precious thing worth preserving.

Try saying: “I love you very much but I will not have that kind of behavior. Do you know why I won’t tolerate that? Simply because you are too bright to behave that way.”

Whenever a child does something positive, always take the time to say, “I am so proud of you, bright boy or girl.”

When a child makes a mistake, never call him stupid; simply say “let’s proofread this” or “very good try.”

When the child has a temper tantrum, say to the child, “I don’t know that person who is acting out right now, but I am sure my bright, well-behaved child will return very quickly now. So I’ll just leave the room until he returns.”

Whatever you do to discipline your child, it must be done consistently. Many times we promise rewards for good behavior and never pay up-this teaches the child that your word cannot be trusted.

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  • turn their homes into havens of welcome and blessing
  • build a lifestyle that beautifully reflects their unique personalities
  • enrich their spirits with growing things (even if their thumbs are several shades shy of green)
  • make mealtimes feasts of thanksgiving and kitchen duty fun
  • establish traditions of celebration that allow joy to filter through to everyday life

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God & Prayer – Talks to Catholic Children

11 Thursday Jun 2020

Posted by Leanevdp in Cheerful Chats for Catholic Children, Parenting, Praying

≈ 3 Comments

The lessons in this talk is just as good for any adult as it is for your children. Take some time to read it to them.

From Christopher’s Talks to Catholic Children by David L. Green stock, 1944

I have mentioned to you in some of the former chapters that, because Jesus was God, He knew all about us while He was on this earth and long before we ever came into this world. He knew who our parents were going to be, where we were going to be born, where we should be going to school, how we were going to live and how we were going to die. In fact, He knew everything about us.

This thought is expressed in the Catechism in these words, “God knows and sees all things, even our most secret thoughts.” I want to talk to you about that for a moment before we go on to anything else.

First of all, there are two ways in which we can think of this complete knowledge God has of all our actions however small. We can picture God, for example, as a big policeman, always watching us to see when we do something wrong and always ready to catch us when the chance arises. To look at it in that way would not only be very wrong but also a great pity. God is not like that at all, and if we go on thinking of Him that way, it will mean that we shall stand a very poor chance of making Him our friend, and that is what we should aim to do.

God is love. He loves us much more than our parents can ever hope to do, and He is always ready and willing to help us in every way possible. I want you to think of this Presence of God and this knowledge of all that we think and do, in that way.

Here are two pictures of very ordinary things in the life of any child. One shows a little child going to school in the morning with his school books in his hand. You will notice that God is there with him, and is always watching over him to see that he is perfectly safe. In the other picture you can see some children swimming. God is there too.

In other words, think of yourself and God as two friends who are always together. You are never alone. Your faithful companion through life is God Himself. In all your actions He is there, not to catch you out in something which is wrong but to be a help and guide through all the actions of your daily life.

Of course, He also sees your sins, too, if you have the misfortune to commit any, but He does not condemn you for them unless there is nothing else to be done. On the contrary, He tries very hard to lead you away from those sins and back to His Love and Friendship. That is the only thing which interests Him.

Think of what a wonderful thing that companionship with God can really mean to us all. If He is with us all day, and if we are never really all alone to face the dangers and the difficulties of this life, how much more pleasant that makes things! That thought naturally leads us on to think about the subject of prayer.

Prayers are really nothing more than little conversations with God, our Friend. If we could only see them in that light, perhaps it would be much easier for us to remember our prayers and to say them well.

Here is a little child saying his morning prayers. Now let us see what that really means. He knows that God is really and truly present in that room with him although he cannot see God. God has not been far away from him all through the night, but has been there watching over him and waiting for him to wake in the morning to begin another day.

Accordingly, when he gets up, he kneels down for just a moment or two and says what we call his morning prayers. That is another way of saying that he says “Good morning,” to God.

Perhaps he says the Morning Offering, which is just simply the offering of all the actions of the coming day to God. Perhaps he says the “Our Father” and the “Hail Mary” to sanctify his day by calling on God and Our Lady to help him to live it well. Whatever it is that he says, it is really nothing more or less than, “Good morning,” to God.

Exactly the same is true of our night prayers. We are just going to sleep and we know that God will be there all the time to watch over us while we are asleep, so we just offer ourselves to Him again and say the Act of Contrition for all the little wrong things which we may have done during the day. He will love us very much for that offering and for that sorrow, and He will forgive us as He always does, because He loves us so much.

You see how much easier prayer becomes if you think of it in this way. It is not just a very unpleasant duty which has to be done first thing in the morning and last thing at night. It is a conversation between us and our best Friend, to offer ourselves to Him, and to say “Good morning,” and “Good night,” to Him as we should.

There are many prayers which you will learn while you are at school and also from your mother. They are all very good, and you should try to learn them well and to say them when you are in church, and say them as well as you can. But that should not be all you do in the way of prayer.

God loves us to take an interest in Him and to talk to Him in the same way in which we would talk to one of our friends. That is to say, with our own words and in our own way. It is a good thing to use a prayer book, and you should always take one to church with you, but you will find that there are many thoughts in your head at times about which you may want to talk to God and which are not contained in any book.

Then the thing for you to do is to talk to God about them in your own words and in your own way. Remember that He is your greatest friend, and that He understands you so very well. He will not mind if the things you are trying to say are not very clearly expressed or in the best possible form of words. It means a great deal to Him you are trying to talk to Him, and we should all try to get away from prayer book language occasionally and rely on our own words.

Here is a boy walking along a road. He has had a quarrel with one of his friends, and he is rather unhappy about it.

God is there with him and they are talking it over between them. How happy God is to be able to listen and to help in some way.

Even the very smallest things in our life are of great importance to God. Our holidays, our friends, our interests—they are His too, and He wants us to tell Him all about them and to talk to Him of them when we feel like it.

There is no need for us to go to church every time we want to talk to God. We can do that wherever we are, because God is always there. Of course He will love it very much if we do go into church occasionally during our walks, because that is His home and He likes to see us there. It shows Him that we do know that He is there, and that we remember Him, not only on Sundays when we have to go to church, but also some other times in the week too.

Here is a little child going to see his great Friend in His own home.

They have very many things to talk about, and you may be sure that God is going to be very interested, and that He will help in every possible way.

Remember that you are never alone, that God is always with you, not to catch you out, but to help and to guide you in all that you do. Talk to Him, that is what is meant by prayer, and don’t be afraid to use your own words or to talk to Him in your heart while you are walking about or while you are playing quietly by yourself or with others.

He is there, and He loves to see that you are enjoying yourself. He probably gave you that find day today just because He knew that it would please you and that you would enjoy it so very much. When you come to say your evening prayers just remember to say a big “Thank you” for everything that He has done for you during the day.

He loves you so very much, and you must try to love Him a little in return. He will always be your friend, and will never turn against you whatever you do. The only way you can drive Him away is to commit some big sin against Him. Then He has to leave you because you have forced Him to, but even then He is always trying to get you to call Him back so that He can be with you again.

God is your best friend, remember that, and try to treat Him as a friend and love Him all you can.

Forgive. “A happy marriage is the union of two good forgivers.” ~ Ruth Bell Graham. This is one of the truest statements ever made. Decide you’re not only going to be his lover – you’re going to be his forgiver. Be quick to forgive and get good at it. You’ll probably have lots of opportunity to practice it. -Lisa Jacobson, 100 Ways to Love Your Husband https://amzn.to/2EkBO3F (afflink)

What are some errors in parenting with raising our children in modern times? Fr. Ripperger has some thoughts….

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Martinez shows how you can make better sense of your life once you realize that God has actually been closest to you when He seemed farthest away; and once you learn why He often speaks to you only in silence. Best of all, Martinez teaches you the secret of true happiness, which you can achieve even amid the troubles that are inescapable elements of every human life. With sober realism and simple faith, this book will show you how to discover — and then to take refuge in — the comfort our Lord offers you, even when He seems to sleep.

Drawing on the wealth of the Church’s living tradition, Fr. Donald Calloway, MIC, calls on all of us to turn to St. Joseph, entrust ourselves, our Church, and our world to our spiritual father’s loving care, and then watch for wonders when the Universal Patron of the Church opens the floodgates of Heaven to pour out graces into our lives today. Definitely a book for our time, Consecration to St. Joseph is dedicated to meeting the challenges of the present moment and restoring order to our Church and our world, all through the potent paternal intercession and care of St. Joseph. This book has everything you need to take your love and devotion to St. Joseph to a whole different level: a thorough program of consecration to St. Joseph; information on the 10 wonders of St. Joseph; and prayers and devotions to St. Joseph. Accessible, motivating, this book will kick off a great movement of consecration to our spiritual father and change the world.

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The Role of Wife – Dear Newlyweds, Pope Pius XII

17 Friday Apr 2020

Posted by Leanevdp in Loving Wife

≈ 3 Comments

I had a talk with a faithful and good Catholic woman the other day. We happened onto the subject of husbands. She said that when it came to parenting, she was the one who saw to all the details….nursed the children when they were sick, knew their emotional upsets and helped them work through it, saw to their education, did a lot of the disciplining, watched them from morning until night, knew every part of their joys and their pains.

Then, while pondering her husband’s role in this, she said, with a slight grin….”My husband knew there were children in the house!”

I chuckled.  And the amazing thing about it was that there was no bitterness in her heart. It was the way it was. Her husband had a different role and she was resigned to that.

We are called to be valiant women. It doesn’t always come out the way we imagined it would be….that dream of a knight in shining armor that is attentive to our every need.

That’s ok. We work with it…and God blesses our marriage and our family.

The following is a gem of an article from Dear Newlyweds by Pope Pius XII…

To follow will be the article “Role of a Husband” by Pope Pius XII…. Husbands, tune in!

You are entering joyously upon the path of married life; the priest has blessed the union of your hearts. We too bless you with the same good wishes for grace and comfort which the Church’s prayer invoked upon you for a happy home.

But from the threshold of your home look around you at the numerous families you know or whom you have known or whose stories you have heard retold, families close by or far away, humble families or important ones. Have all the marriages which founded these families been happy? Are all the families tranquil and at peace? Have all the couples lived up to their hopes or their first glowing expectations?

It would be vain to imagine so. Families are often afflicted by troubles even if they are not sought, even if no motive or occasion is given to attract them. “Misfortunes,” says the great Christian novelist Manzoni, “very often come because some motive is given them; but the most cautious and innocent conduct is not enough to hold them off; and when they come, through fault or not, trust in God sweetens them and makes them useful for a better life.”

The most unhappy married lives are those in which the law of God is seriously violated by one or even both of the parties. But although these offenses are the most deadly source of family misfortune, we do not wish to dwell upon them today.

We are thinking rather of those couples who conduct themselves properly, who are faithful to the basic duties of their state, but who are nonetheless unhappy in their marriages, who feel angry, ill at ease, a sense of alienation, coldness, shock.

Whose fault and responsibility is this anxiety and vexation? There is absolutely no doubt that a wife can do more than a husband to make a happy home.

The prime role of the husband is to provide a living and prepare the future for the family and the home in those matters which affect him and the children in that future.

The woman’s role encompasses those countless, ceaseless details, those imponderable daily attentions and cares which create the atmosphere of a family, and, depending on whether they are properly performed or not, make the home either healthy, attractive, and comfortable, or demoralized and unbearable.

A wife’s activities in the home must always be the work of “the valiant woman” so highly praised in Holy Scripture, the woman in whom “the heart of her husband trusteth” and who will “render him good and not evil, all the days of her life” (Prov. 31:1 1 – 1 2) .

Is it not an ageless truth—a truth rooted in the very physical conditions of a woman’s life, an inexorable truth proclaimed not only by the experience of distant centuries but also of those more recent in our era of consuming industrialization, of seeking for vindication, of competitive sport—that the woman makes the home and takes care of it and that the man can never replace her in this?

This is the mission which nature and her union with man has imposed upon her for the good of society itself. Entice her away, lure her far from her family with one of those many attractions that vie to overcome and conquer, and you will see the woman leave her family hearth untended.

Without this fire, the atmosphere of the home grows cold. For all practical purposes the home will cease to exist and will be transformed into a precarious refuge of a few hours.

The center of daily life will move elsewhere for the husband, for herself, and for the children. Now whether they wish it or not, the husband and wife who are determined to remain faithful to the duties of their way of life can erect the magnificent edifice of happiness only on the solid foundation of family life.

But where will you find true family life without a home, without a visible focal point to encompass, anchor and sustain this life, to deepen and develop it, to cause it to bloom?

Do not say that the home exists materially from the moment the two hands are joined and the newlyweds have the same room, under the same roof, in their apartment or dwelling, be it large or small, rich or poor. No.

The material house is not enough for the spiritual edifice of happiness. The material house must rise to a more wholesome level, and the living and vivifying flame of the new family must leap from the earthly hearth.

This will not be the work of a day, especially if one does not dwell in the home already prepared by preceding generations, but rather—as is most frequently the case today, at least in the cities—in a temporary residence, simply rented from someone else.

To create, therefore, little by little, day by day, a true spiritual home, will be the crowning work of the one who has become “the mistress of the house,” she whom “the heart of her husband trusteth.”

Whether the husband be a workman, a farmer, a professional man, a man of letters, a scientist, an artist, a clerk or an executive, it is inevitable that most of the time his activities take him away from home, or, if at home, he confines himself for long hours in the silence of his office away from the center of the family.

For him the focus of the family will become the place where, at the end of his day’s work, he can refresh his physical and moral powers in calm repose and serene joy.

For the woman, on the other hand, the house usually remains the center of her principal activity, and, little by little, however poor it may be, she will make that house a home.

It will become an abode of peace and joy beautified not by furniture or decorations like a hotel, without personal style or taste or character, but by reminders in the furnishings or on the walls of the events of the life together—the tastes, the ideas, the joys and sufferings shared, traces at times visible, other times almost imperceptible, from which with passage of time the physical home will draw its soul.

Its entire soul, however, will be the feminine hand and touch with which the wife will make every corner of the home attractive, if only by care, order and cleanliness, with everything ready and in place for use when needed or desired.

God has endowed woman more than man with a sense of grace and good taste, with the gift of making the simplest things pleasant and welcome precisely because, although she is formed like man to help him and to constitute the family with him, she was born to spread kindness and sweetness in her husband’s home and to see to it that their life together is harmonious, fruitful and fully developed.

And when in His goodness Our Lord blesses the wife with the dignity of motherhood, the cry of the newborn babe will neither disturb nor destroy the happiness of the home.

It will instead increase it and raise it to that divine glory where the angels of heaven shine and whence descends a ray of life which conquers nature and regenerates the children of men into sons of God.

This is the sanctity of the nuptial bed! This is the sublime nature of Christian motherhood! Here is the salvation of the married woman!

The woman, as the great Apostle Paul proclaims, will save herself through her mission as a mother, as long as she continues “in faith and love and holiness with modesty” (I Tim. 2:15).

You can understand now that “godliness is profitable in all respects, since it has the promise of the present life as well as of that which is to come” (I Tim. 4:8), and since it is, as St. Ambrose explains, “the foundation of all virtues.”

A cradle consecrates the mother of the family, and many cradles sanctify and glorify her in the eyes of her husband, her children, the Church and her country.

Foolish indeed, ignorant of themselves, and unhappy are those mothers who complain when a new child clings to them and asks to be fed at the fountain of their breasts!

To complain against God’s blessing which embraces and enlarges the home is to imperil the happiness of the family.

The heroism of motherhood is the pride and glory of the Christian wife. In the desolation of a home without the joy of these little angels of God, her loneliness becomes a prayer and plea to heaven and her tears join with the sobs of Anna who at the door to the temple begged the Lord for the gift of her Samuel.

Therefore, dear newlyweds, raise your thoughts constantly to a consideration of your responsibilities in order to achieve the serene bliss of married life, for you are surely well aware of its grave and serious side.

“A true wife makes a man’s life nobler, stronger, grander, by the omnipotence of her love ‘turning all the forces of manhood upward and heavenward.’ While she clings to him in holy confidence and loving dependence she brings out in him whatever is nobles and richest in his being. She inspires him with her courage and earnestness. She beautifies his life. She softens whatever is rude and harsh in his habits or his spirit. She clothes him with the gentler graces of refined and cultured manhood. While she yields to him and never disregards his lightest wish, she is really his queen, ruling his whole life and leading him onward and upward in every proper path.” J.R.Miller

Painting by Andres Orpinas

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Review: For the spiritually-conscious couple this book is a must. Written in the 1920’s by a Catholic priest to counsel married couples on sexual morality, daily problems and child rearing.
Among many wonderful lessons, it describes plainly what I needed to know about which birth-control method is moral and which is immoral, from a Traditional Roman Catholic point of view.

A Frank, Yet Reverent Instruction on the Intimate Matters of Personal Life for Young Men. To our dear and noble Catholic youths who have preserved, or want to recover, their purity of heart, and are minded to retain it throughout life. For various reasons many good fathers of themselves are not able to give their sons this enlightenment on the mysteries of life properly and sufficiently. They may find this book helpful in the discharge of their parental responsibilities in so delicate a matter.

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Work Can Be Prayer and “Offer it Up”

15 Friday Nov 2019

Posted by Leanevdp in Parenting, Praying

≈ 9 Comments

 How to Raise Good Catholic Children, Mary Reed Newland, Sophia Institute Press

Work can be prayer

And that brings us to work as a form of prayer, and helping children understand that work done for the love of God is as tangible an act of love as if they were to run to Him with an embrace.

In the beginning, learning to make our bed, dry the dishes, and polish shoes is fun and a kind of play at being grown up, but soon the novelty wears off, and the chores that started out being fun can lose their glamour and become unpleasant drudgery.

If they are prayer, however, it can be different. Not that tasks we hate doing are suddenly transformed into occasions of great spiritual joy; but there’s a great difference between doing them because you’re told you must, and doing them because they can be applied to the sufferings of some other child somewhere, who has no bed to make, who must spend his nights curled up in a hole, shivering, starved, unhappy, and with no one to care for him.

Then there’s a good reason to try to make our bed with care instead of pulling up the covers to hide the rumples underneath. Then smoothing the sheets, and squaring the corners, and plumping the pillows can be small ceremonies of love from a small girl who does them because Christ can use them as balm for one of His suffering members.

And one of the loveliest things about teaching children that work is prayer is that mothers can’t help having it rub off on them.

These diapers that are changed daily, these meals that are cooked again and again, these floors that are scrubbed today only to get dirty tomorrow — these are as truly prayer in a mother’s vocation as the watches and prayers of the religious are in theirs.

Encourage your child to offer up his sufferings

There is suffering, too, in the lives of children, and it is eloquent prayer. Mere stoicism has no part in the training of a Christian. Too often it’s the death knell to humility.

But suffering embraced and offered to the suffering Christ, even with howls and tears, is a mighty weapon.

The road to Calvary was one long, unending bruise, and it helps a child to remember when he’s hurt that Jesus was hurt like this, and much more, and this pain in a mysterious way can be poured on His wounds and will help make up for the pain He had to bear. Every mother in the world kisses the bumps and bruises of her young to “make them well.”

We can give them something much more tangible to do with their hurts than merely bring them to be kissed. We can comfort and calm and then direct them in the use of the pain, and it’s surprising how willingly they will learn the lesson of pain and its value.

“Offer it up, dear; give it to Jesus to help comfort Him for the pain of the nails in His poor hands and feet.”

Faced as he is with a lifetime of recurring suffering (in one way or another), we give a child the only wholesome weapon to be used when we teach him to take his own pain in his own two hands and apply it freely, as he does work and play and prayer, to the comforting of Christ and His work in His Church.

Many times, parents will turn to scolding the “naughty chair” or the “bad table” in an effort to ease the pain and insult of a child who comes to grief through his own carelessness.

In the process, they feed little desires for vengeance; they give him no recourse but senseless, continuing rebellion against anything and everything that crosses him.

One time, a man who lives in our town was working on his car with no success, growing more and more angry because the cursed (and I do mean cursed) car would not start.

In a rage, finally, he threw his wrench at it, broke a part, and instead of a tricky repair job, he had added to his woes the problem of thumbing a ride to a service station to buy a new part, thumbing a ride back, and starting from scratch to install the new part.

Perhaps his explosion was only the fault of an ungovernable temper, but perhaps — who knows? — it had its beginning long ago in childhood when the only solace for a barked shin was, “Naughty chair to hurt the baby. Kick it back, sonny, kick it back.”

Living in a fallen world, our children are bound to be hurt, both physically and spiritually. We will save them years of wasted opportunities if we teach them that, along with everything else, pain is part of their prayer.

“It is astonishing what undreamed-of qualities a sense of responsibility awakens in a young soul; how the very idea that something depends on her, that she is being trusted, puts our little maid upon her mettle. Therefore it is a good plan to leave to a young daughter some particular duty or duties for which she is entirely responsible. This may of course be a very slight thing to begin with—the dusting of a room, or the arrangement of flowers or books, or the superintendence of the tea-table; but whatever it is, the mother should insist that it be done regularly and at the appointed time. Thus will she teach her child punctuality and a primary lesson in a method, which is the key to all perfect housekeeping. Of course it is a little trouble to the mother to superintend the performance of such little duties, but she will have her reward in the daily increasing helpfulness of the daughter in the home.” – Annie S. Swan, Courtship and Marriage And the Gentle Art of Home-Making, 1894

♥️UPDATE ON BABY CHARLOTTE:
Charlotte is still in the hospital. She has been taken off of everything, including and very recently, the anti-seizure medication. She still has a feeding tube and is being monitored as to how well she is nursing. Z is making daily trips to the hospital and staying for the day. Colin and Z are looking forward to the time when she can be at home and things settle back to some kind of normalcy. Thank you for your prayers! ♥️

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This is a unique book of Catholic devotions for young children. There is nothing routine and formal about these stories. They are interesting, full of warmth and dipped right out of life. These anecdotes will help children know about God, as each one unfolds a truth about the saints, the Church, the virtues, etc. These are short faith-filled stories, with a few questions and a prayer following each one, enabling the moral of each story to sink into the minds of your little ones. The stories are only a page long so tired mothers, who still want to give that “tucking in” time a special touch, or pause a brief moment during their busy day to gather her children around her, can feel good about bringing the realities of our faith to the minds of her children in a childlike, (though not childish), way. There is a small poem and a picture at the end of each story. Your children will be straining their necks to see the sweet pictures! Through these small stories, parents will sow seeds of our Holy Catholic Faith that will enrich their families all the years to come!

This revised 1922 classic offers gentle guidance for preteen and teenage girls on how to become a godly woman. Full of charm and sentiment, it will help mother and daughter establish a comfortable rapport for discussions about building character, friendships, obedience, high ideals, a cheerful spirit, modest dress, a pure heart, and a consecrated life.

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Starting From Scratch – Building a Happy Home

25 Wednesday Sep 2019

Posted by Leanevdp in by Charlotte Siems

≈ 3 Comments

Painting by Haynes King, 1800’s

by Charlotte Siems

Before having children, many women worry about what kind of mother they will be. Nothing unusual about that, but a difficult childhood instilled in me a fear that I wouldn’t know how to have a normal family home life. I worried about how I would handle discipline or how I would treat possible future children. On the other hand, that same childhood experience made me determined to create a marriage and home that was stable, warm and peaceful.

Early in my mothering career I attended a parenting conference and heard Dr. Herbert Ratner make the following statement: “The 20 years between 20 and 40 (years of age) are just as long as the 20 years between 40 and 60. What you do in the first 20 years determines how happy you will be in the second 20 years.” That idea stuck with me. I determined to live life with the end in mind.

Not knowing how to have a happy home, I set out to learn how. Here are a few things I figured out:

Books don’t magically solve problems. Sometimes we deceive ourselves into thinking we’re doing something because we read about it and agree with it. Close the book and do what it says.

Surround yourself with what is true and lovely. Protect yourself from ugly input. Don’t live in a bleak, cluttered environment. Bring beauty, warmth, and neatness to all of your life. Be very careful what you allow to enter your mind and eyes. Constant exposure to beautiful ideas and noble goals will transform your thought life.

We all know that thoughts determine actions, don’t we?

Do the things you don’t want to do. Do them cheerfully and well. Edith Schaeffer wrote, “Somebody has to get up early, stay up late, do more than the others, if the human garden is to be a thing of beauty.” At first glance it doesn’t seem fair, but there are hidden and precious rewards for dying to self and serving. Stomping and self-pity cancel the reward points.

Choose your hard things. Do your laundry and put it away. That’s hard. Get ready to go somewhere and realize no one has clean clothes to wear. That’s hard. You pick.

Take the time. Yes, I know you’re busy. Throw a meal on the table and get on to the next thing. No time for a tablecloth and candles and flowers. You’ll do that when you have time. But before you know it, the weeks, the months and the years pass, and the children leave home and you never had time.

Lest you think I’ve sailed through life with clean laundry and beautiful meal tables, I assure you these lessons were hard earned. Many times I felt inadequate to the task. It was like trying to pour water from a dry bucket. Giving your children what you didn’t have as a child is not easy. Creating a happy home life from scratch will take everything you’ve got and even that won’t be enough.

It turns out that giving your family what you didn’t receive, gives it back to you.

🍂🍁🌻🧡Autumn is on our doorstep! “This atmosphere of ‘hurry up, let’s go’ does not provide the necessary leisure in which to anticipate and celebrate a season. As soon as people stop taking the time they really do not live any more–they are being lived, as it were…” -Maria von Trapp
Illustration by Heather Stillufsen

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A must-read for the married and those considering marriage! This guidebook to finding a happy marriage, keeping a happy marriage, and raising happy children has been out of print for over 50 years…until now! From the master of the spiritual life, Raoul Plus, S.J., it contains loads of practical and spiritual advice on family life. Have you been looking for a handbook on marriage and raising children that is based on truth? You’ve found it!

The saints assure us that simplicity is the virtue most likely to draw us closer to God and make us more like Him.

No wonder Jesus praised the little children and the pure of heart! In them, He recognized the goodness that arises from an untroubled simplicity of life, a simplicity which in the saints is completely focused on its true center, God.

That’s easy to know, simple to say, but hard to achieve.

For our lives are complicated and our personalities too. (We even make our prayers and devotions more complicated than they need be!)

In these pages, Fr. Raoul Plus provides a remedy for the even the most tangled lives.

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Catholic Education in the Home (Part Three – Conclusion)

13 Tuesday Aug 2019

Posted by Leanevdp in Catholic Home Life, Family Life, Parenting

≈ 2 Comments

This is Part Three of an excellent article! It was given the Nihil Obstat in Australia in 1955. The name of the Dominican sister was not included.

The article has many things to ponder and take to heart!

Part One

Part Two

ON EARTH THE BROKEN ARC. . . . . . .

I know some may be tempted to think that all this talk of beauty and art is too impractical, too much far away from the business of everyday life – or that the country home cannot do much about it. But a Catholic should never let himself think like that. He should know that to be a complete person, means to be able to see and to feel, to imagine and even to create what is beautiful.

I cannot go into this any further, much as I would like to. I shall say just this:- the home can do more in this matter than the school. Like love for our Holy Faith, appreciation of the fine and lovely things of life comes from constant association with beautiful things themselves and with people who have a genuine love and understanding of them.

So it is for parents to help their children in this vital matter. Simplicity, neatness, color, brightness, and good taste can make the house and garden lovely without great expense. A few really good pictures by great artists can help to form the children’s taste.

There are, for example, so many of Our Lady by artists such as Fra Angelico, Botticelli and Raphael, that it seems a shame to have instead, ones that are unworthy of Our Lady’s beauty and dignity.

A good book for helping children to understand art has a significant title, Pictures to Grow Up With.

Children take great notice of pictures in the home and I know I can recall vividly all the pictures in our home. Hence the importance of having lovely ones and of encouraging the children really to look at them – and to make their own, to draw and paint and make things.

Much of a child’s future happiness and goodness depends on what the home and the school have done to help him to discover and develop his special creative powers, his capacity for making something beautiful

RESPONSE TO POETRY

It seems harder to discover what can be done at home to foster a love of poetry. There are collections of works by genuine poets (i.e. not just writers of verse for children) which are produced in such a way as to captivate the attention – such as the Adventures in Poetry series by Mary Daunt, or The Blackbird in the Lilac, by James Reeves or an Australian Adventures in Poetry, edited by Donald McLean, and Gospel Rhymes, published by Sheed and Ward.

If these could be read aloud and talked over, it would be a good beginning. The attitude of the adults to poetry has a great deal to do with the child’s response to it.

MUSIC -TO UPLIFT OR DEGRADE?

To develop appreciation of good music is both easier and harder – easier because modern people will listen more readily to music than to poetry; harder because so much music is heard that is utterly worthless, if not vulgar and degrading.

Positive efforts are always best in this as in all education. You can find ways of knowing what is good; and by wise choice of radio programs and the playing of records of good music the home can set up right standards for the children before their taste has been spoilt.

If it is at all possible, some members of the family who have the gift should learn to play the piano or other musical instruments. They can then give great joy to the others.

I could say much more, but I daresay you are thinking that I have said enough. Still I think you will see from the above, that one of the defects of the education of girls, especially of those who are going to be home-makers in the country, is that it is too similar to a boy’s education.

Training in art and music, in subjects such as history and great literature, in all that would make for good taste in dress, speech and home decoration and management would do more to fit a girl to be a Christian mother and the mistress of a Christian home.

EDUCATION FOR RURAL LIVING

And so I come to my final point – what the country home can do to educate the child for rural living.

An American writer on the “Forward to the Land movement”, expressed the value of rural living thus:-To live a decent, human life a man needs space for family living, a good environment for bringing up children, one where children are welcome, the possession of property so that the family can have both independence and responsibility, and a chance for genuine community living, for true neighbourliness.

Only the country can give all this. A nation can be no stronger than its families are, and they can be at their best in the country. And when to this natural strength we add the crowning glory of the Catholic Faith, when we strive to bring Christ to the countryside, and the land to Christ, we are certainly exercising a great apostolate.

This is the ideal and the vocation we wish to hand on to our children. They will learn it best by living it, by being given an active share in it, while still young. If the chance to be truly responsible for what one does is one of the values of rural living, then the rural home must give each child jobs to do which he must do with faithfulness and responsibility.

It is not enough that he sees, what is easily seen on a farm, that the feeding of animals, the watering of plants, the milking of cows, the gathering of eggs, the preparing of meals cannot be put aside for another day. He must share that responsibility if he is to experience the joy of a job well done.

The jobs should not be burdensome to the child, but they should be really necessary jobs, and the child should be really responsible for doing them.

Anyone who has had much to do with modern children, would realize their need for a sense of responsibility, and for acquiring a spirit of work and a respect for its dignity. At the same time the children will learn from sharing the family work to care for things with reverence and detachment, to use them properly – a very valuable lesson that is so hard to teach to the child who has to spend his growing years in a flat or in a few rented rooms.

COMMUNITY LIFE

True neighborliness or the spirit of genuine community living is really an extension of a sense of responsibility. It is living a truth that, as members of the Body of Christ we are almost as responsible for the goodness and happiness of others as we are for our own. We are all one in Christ. Someone has put it thus: ‘The countryman retains in his very fiber the knowledge that God’s answer to “Am I my brother’s keeper?” is an emphatic “Yes.”

Children should not only see the genuine concern which their parents have for the troubles of others and their readiness to give help; they should have their share in helping.

Picnics and parties and games together are the joyful side of neighborliness; children need this, and the more serious side as well. As they grow up in the more spacious country environment, they can learn the meaning and value of quietness, serenity and solitude; but they should realize that they are never isolated, no matter how far away the nearest homestead.

From their parents, too, children learn to take an active part in parish functions and entertainments, to give time and energy to supporting movements such as the Rural Movement, or any movement or club that is working to help the Catholic boy or girl to be, in time, an intelligent and contented member of a country community.

SENSE OF VALUES

A parent’s surest means of developing in their children this intelligent appreciation of a rural way of life, is by giving them a happy home life with parents and children sharing their interests and fun. Nothing can replace the value of that in any child’s life, but it is particularly true of the country child’s life, who at some time or other will be tempted by the seeming enchantment of city life.

It can be a very strong temptation, but parents who have realized that their vocation in life is to educate their children in God’s way, will not be found wanting. Their own love for each other and for God, is the strongest foundation of happiness in the home, and that is one reason why they will keep to themselves any differences or disagreements that may arise between them.

They will realize that the special home virtues of unselfishness, bearing with one another, gentleness, generosity and modesty will not come without prayer and personal effort.

Each of these would be worthy of a talk on its own, but unselfish courtesy and modesty are needed by the child of today to a degree that is almost frightening-courtesy because it means a real concern for the feelings of others, a deep respect, a reverence for the person of others-and reverence, we are told, is fast disappearing from our world.

Good manners is the outward showing of courtesy and good-mannered children have good-mannered parents; that is the only certain way.

This is true also of modesty – a person’s sense of reverence for himself, his own person. Here, the father has a tremendous responsibility for the modest manliness of his sons and their respect for women; and the mother must know that her girl’s womanly modesty and purity depend largely on hers.

A girl nowadays, at least in the city, needs this virtue to an heroic degree, so great are the temptations to unbecoming dress and behavior.

Yet Catholic women, who knew how to dress smartly and modestly, and had the courage of their convictions, could start a revolution in this matter.

THE HOME OF A SAINT

To end my talk, I want to quote the words of our Holy Father, the Pope, spoken when he was canonizing St. Maria Goretti, the twelve year-old martyr of purity. She was, he said, “the fruit of a Christian home with its old simple method of education, a home where one prays, where the children are brought up in fear of God, in obedience to parents, in the love of truth and self-respect, accustomed to be satisfied with little, and to give a helping hand.”

It was a country home, and Maria was a country child, who learnt early the meaning of sharing fully in the joys and sufferings of a family – the give and take of a family life.

I have always loved the ideals of country life, and have loved teaching children from country homes. That is why I am glad and honored to speak to you today, to get to know a little of those who make it possible for children to be truly childlike.

City children have their own lovableness and perhaps a greater need of our work, but I often find myself longing to give them the tremendous benefits of growing up in the country – and that is why I think every effort should be made to establish in the country, colleges and schools that are fully Catholic and truly rural in ideals.

Our Lady was the mistress of a little village home in Nazareth; Jesus was a little village child. I know their loving spirit will guide every step the country child takes on his way to heaven.

“For years, while raising children, a mother’s time is never her own, her own needs have to be kept in second place, and every time she turns around a hand is reaching out and demanding something. Hence, a mother raising children, perhaps in a more privileged way even than a professional contemplative, is forced, almost against her will, to constantly stretch her heart.” -Fr. Rolheiser, OMI

“This is the book that traditionally minded Catholic family women have been looking for. Long out of print, this rare jewel is destined to become the favored spiritual guide for Catholic wives and mothers. Msgr. Landriot gave these conferences over 100 years ago but they are as relevant to us today as the Gospels. Think of this book as a practical guide for women who want to achieve sanctity in the home.” Check it out at Loreto Publications here.

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