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Finer Femininity

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Finer Femininity

Category Archives: FF Tidbits

Living Advent and Christmas With Intention

10 Tuesday Dec 2019

Posted by Leanevdp in Advent/Christmas, by Leane Vdp, FF Tidbits

≈ 3 Comments

Here we are, a little over two weeks before Christmas. Busy times are ahead!

This is our reminder to stop and smell …. the evergreens and the cinnamon along the way!

Our traditions and customs are important. My daughter, Theresa and I made a video about all the Advent Customs we do in our homes. They keep us busy! And, in the last couple of weeks things will ramp up with baking, wrapping gifts, decorating our home and tree, etc. These things ARE important…after all, Jesus, Our Lord, is coming! Oh yes!

In this hubbub, I want to remind you (and me) of something my mom drove home to me over the years….that “people are more important than things”…and schedules…and work, etc.

One time my mom was in the attic with her mom, my Grandma. Grandma was going through an old trunk that had some special “treasures” kept through the years. Grandma’s family was poor; they had nine children and lived in an old farmhouse. Grandma’s eyes began to fill with tears as she stroked a piece of pretty material found in the timeworn chest.

She said, “I wish I had given this material to your sister when she asked for it years ago. I thought I would use it some day…it was too pretty to hand over to her. She wanted so bad to practice her sewing. And now she is married and moved out…and I missed that opportunity.”

It was just a little thing…but a great lesson to remember….

Don’t lose sight of the people you love. Don’t put them on the back burner.

This last week we were very much reminded of this lesson. My husband is involved in a health and wellness business. He had just gone to a business meeting in September, met the owner and was greatly impressed. He said he reminded him of his dad. They took a picture together.

This week we found out that this same man, his brother (the founders of the business), their dad and six of their sons/sons-in-laws, along with a grandson died in an airplane crash coming back from a pheasant hunting trip! What a blow! What a tragedy!

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The family that was left behind did not know that last year’s Christmas was the last one they would ever have with them.  Please pray for the Hansen family…I firmly believe we were led to them for the short time we’ve known them,  so we can pray for their souls.

We also never know the time nor the hour when one of our family or friends will be called. Not that we are to live in fear…but this is a reminder…let’s live with intention….and don’t take your loved ones for granted among the busy-ness of the season!

Enjoy the little things in life because one day you will look back and realize they were the big things.

You will never have this day again. You will never cross this moment of time again. Use it wisely.

What are some little ways you can make this a reality?

Stop what you are doing and greet your husband when he comes home, listen to him even if you’re busy with holiday preparations.

Have dinner ready, if you can. Let him know he is special.

Look and listen, really listen, when your child is talking to you.

Read them a Christmas bedtime story…make this a habit.

Let them bake cookies with you…in spite of the mess and the fact that it would be easier to do it on your own. What child doesn’t like to sit on the counter, legs dangling, while holding the mixer or cracking the eggs!? (Be ready to fish out the eggshells!)

Train yourself to see the positive in those you rub shoulders with each day. It will have its effiects, I guarantee!

Do you have an elderly parent you need to spend time with? Do it! Do you have a difficult sibling that you find it hard to be kind to? Be kind!

Yes, we will do our baking, our wrapping, our tree….but let’s not get too wound up! Let’s not take on so much that we are totally stressed out. Not worth it.

Fr. Jacque Philippe:

“I often say jokingly that the ladder of perfection has only one step: the step we take today.

Without concerning ourselves about the past or the future, we can decide to believe today, place all our trust in God today, love God and neighbor today.

Whether our good resolutions produce success or failure, next day we can begin again, not relying on our strength but only on God’s faithfulness.”

Life happens in the moments. If we take on way too much we get frustrated. Then the daily things…reading a story, wiping a nose, listening to others, is done begrudgingly.

Remember these little things are the ones that make memories, create atmosphere and build relationships.

One last thing from St. Francis de Sales (who doesn’t love this quote?!)

“Be patient with everyone, but above all with yourself…do not be disheartened by your imperfections, but always rise up with fresh courage.”

Advent is a new season of the Church. Every time we pick ourselves up, it is a new season. Don’t ever get discouraged.

So…this Advent and Christmas live with intention. And remember, Ladies, that your life as a homemaker is very important. And your joyful presence in the home is more important than any of the presents under the tree!

Each day is a chance to grow in virtue and it begins with the little things. Show your husband you care…listen to him, smile at him, give him a hug when he doesn’t expect it. Your children are watching and courtesy and love are contagious! This Advent can be special…. it starts with you! -Finer Femininity

Our attitude changes our life…it’s that simple. Our good attitude greatly affects those that we love, making our homes a more cheerier and peaceful dwelling! To have this control…to be able to turn around our attitude is a tremendous thing to think about!
This Gratitude Journal is here to help you focus on the good, the beautiful, the praiseworthy. “For the rest, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever modest, whatsoever just, whatsoever holy, whatsoever lovely, whatsoever of good fame, if there be any virtue, if any praise of discipline, think on these things.” (Philippians 4:8 – Douay Rheims).
Yes, we need to be thinking of these things throughout the day!
You will be disciplined, the next 30 days, to write positive, thankful thoughts down in this journal. You will be thinking about good memories, special moments, things and people you are grateful for, lovely and thought-provoking Catholic quotes, thoughts before bedtime, etc. Saying it, reading it, writing it, all helps to ingrain thankfulness into our hearts…and Our Lord so loves gratefulness! It makes us happier, too!
Available here.



Women historically have been denigrated as lower than men or viewed as privileged. Dr. Alice von Hildebrand characterizes the difference between such views as based on whether man’s vision is secularistic or steeped in the supernatural. She shows that feminism’s attempts to gain equality with men by imitation of men is unnatural, foolish, destructive, and self-defeating. The Blessed Mother’s role in the Incarnation points to the true privilege of being a woman. Both virginity and maternity meet in Mary who exhibits the feminine gifts of purity, receptivity to God’s word, and life-giving nurturance at their highest.

You’ll learn how to grow in wisdom and in love as you encounter the unglamorous, everyday problems that threaten all marriages. As the author says: If someone were to give me many short bits of wool, most likely I would throw them away. A carpet weaver thinks differently. He knows the marvels we can achieve by using small things artfully and lovingly. Like the carpet weaver, the good wife must be an artist of love. She must remember her mission and never waste the little deeds that fill her day the precious bits of wool she s been given to weave the majestic tapestry of married love.

This remarkable book will show you how to start weaving love into the tapestry of your marriage today, as it leads you more deeply into the joys of love.

This post contains affiliate links. Thank you for your support.

Happy Thanksgiving from Finer Femininity!

27 Wednesday Nov 2019

Posted by Leanevdp in FF Tidbits, Seasons, Seasons, Feast Days, etc., Smorgasbord 'n Smidgens

≈ 3 Comments

May your Thanksgiving Day be filled with blessings! I am thankful for you, your prayers and support! ❤

Some inspirational quotes

Mothers,  on Thanksgiving, know how very special you are. You are the essence, the heart of your home. Your smile lightens the burdens, your words brighten the hearts of those who will be part of your festivities. The tone of this special family time is set by you! We, as mothers, are privileged to have such an important part in the making of our homes! May your day be filled with grace and love! ❤

This Thanksgiving let us offer up our little inconveniences, our stresses, our fatigue for those less fortunate than ourselves. And, on the flip side, let’s start becoming more aware of the little things and thanking God for them.

“After committing a fault of whatever kind, rather than withdrawing into ourselves indefinitely in discouragement and dwelling on the memory, we must immediately return to God with confidence and even thank Him for the good that His mercy will be able to draw out of this fault!

We must know that one of the weapons that the devil uses most commonly to prevent souls from advancing toward God is precisely to try to make them lose their peace and discourage them by the sight of their faults.”
Searching For and Maintaining Peace, Fr. Jacques Philippe https://amzn.to/2pSwDmQ (afflink)

 

Thank God for His many blessings. Make the most of each and every day. Enjoy the journey. The world will keep whizzing by but we must take time to smell the roses. Each day is a gift, each person in your life is special. Take nothing for granted.

“For me, prayer is an aspiration of the heart, it is a simple glance directed to heaven, it is a cry of gratitude and love in the midst of trial as well as joy!” ❤❤❤-St. Therese of Lisieux

Be attentive to the sacrifices your husband makes for the family. Each day he battles the world, the flesh and the devil out in the workforce for you. Don’t let that go unnoticed. Thank him often! Appreciate him. -Finer Femininity

Discussing the dynamics of Catholic family life…

Black Friday Sale!

Check it out! Books by Leane. Package Special! Includes all 17 Books! Savings of 200.00! Available here. 


Author Mary Reed Newland here draws on her own experiences as the mother of seven to show how the classic Christian principles of sanctity can be translated into terms easily applied to children even to the very young.

Because it’s rooted in experience, not in theory, nothing that Mrs. Newland suggests is impossible or extraordinary. In fact, as you reflect on your experiences with your own children, you’ll quickly agree that hers is an excellent commonsense approach to raising good Catholic children.

Fr. Lawrence Lovasik, the renowned author of The Hidden Power of Kindness, gives faithful Catholics all the essential ingredients of a stable and loving Catholic marriage and family — ingredients that are in danger of being lost in our turbulent age.

Using Scripture and Church teachings in an easy-to-follow, step-by-step format, Fr. Lovasik helps you understand the proper role of the Catholic father and mother and the blessings of family. He shows you how you can secure happiness in marriage, develop the virtues necessary for a successful marriage, raise children in a truly Catholic way, and much more.

This post contains affiliate links. Thank you for your support.

Baby Charlotte Update / Thank You!

09 Saturday Nov 2019

Posted by Leanevdp in Baby Charlotte, FF Tidbits

≈ 22 Comments

UPDATE ON BABY CHARLOTTE:

When the doctor first came to us after Charlotte was born, she told us that the baby would probably not make it. When I asked her if there was any chance, she said that she believed in miracles…

Well, we have watched the miracle unfold!! All the results are in from the tests, including the MRI. All of them have turned out to be…perfectly NORMAL!!

Z is feeling “worlds better”, too (as she put it)!

We know the power of prayer and we have felt your prayers, encouragement and support along the way….and we are very grateful!

Colin and Z are getting a Triduum of Masses offered by Father VanderPutten in Nigeria for all of you and your intentions. God bless you!

Update on Z and Baby Charlotte

03 Sunday Nov 2019

Posted by Leanevdp in Baby Charlotte, FF Tidbits

≈ 23 Comments

We are overwhelmed with your generosity and your support in the prayers that have been lifted up for Z (Mom) and Baby Charlotte! So…I wanted to update you on the little bit we know right now. Your prayers are such a comfort!

Z’s note to you…

I am just so overwhelmed by all the love from my family and friends around the world. No cross is too hard to bear when you have so many people lifting you up!! ❤️

Colin and Z…utterly exhausted.

Colin brought the kids up to see Mom. Hannah has been looking after them.

Z seems to be doing as well as expected. They are struggling a bit to keep her blood pressure down. The word has been that she may get out of the hospital on Monday.

Friday…All Saint’s Day:

When Z was pushing, the doctor and the nurses (3 of them) saw that the baby’s heartbeat dropped way down. When they couldn’t get it up, they “literally” ran her bed to the emergency C-Section room. The doctor said Z went under anesthesia at 1:01 p.m. and the baby was born at 1:02 p.m!

Z had a very large rupture of her uterus and therefore, the baby was deprived of oxygen and blood flow.

The doctor came in to Colin and myself and had a very grim prognosis. She said most babies do not survive and if they do, they have huge problems. When I asked if some cases turn out all right, she said that miracles happen…and she has seen some.

So…that is what we are praying for!

Right now the baby is undergoing something called “Cooling Therapy”. Here is the explanation….

Quote from HIE Help Center.

There is one established treatment that can minimize permanent brain damage from hypoxic-ischemic encephalopathy (HIE). However, it must be given very shortly after birth/the oxygen-depriving incident in order to be effective (ideally within six hours). This treatment is known as hypothermia therapy, but it has many other names, such as “therapeutic hypothermia,” “cooling therapy,” and “neonatal cooling.” Hypothermia therapy involves cooling the baby down to a temperature below homeostasis to allow the brain to recover from a hypoxic-ischemic injury. Typically, the target temperature is about 33.5 degrees Celsius (92.3 degrees Fahrenheit) (1). There are two ways that hypothermia therapy can be administered: using a cooling cap for “selective brain cooling” or by cooling the baby’s entire body (“whole-body cooling”). Either of these options can be effective; the choice to use one over the other is dependent on what protocols are in place and what equipment a particular NICU has (2).

By Monday night Charlotte should be done this part.

Then the rewarming…

After therapeutic hypothermia, the baby must be rewarmed slowly in order to prevent reperfusion injury. The AMC PSO suggests that the baby’s temperature should be increased by 0.2 – 0.5 degrees Celsius, until it reaches 36.5 degrees Celsius. Because there is an increased risk of seizure activity during rewarming, doctors should also consider EEG monitoring (2).

Z has only seen her baby once….for a very short time. We will try to keep watch as much as we can with Little Charlotte.

Once again, thank you so much for the prayers.

I will continue my regular posts and give you any significant updates. The prayers mean so much. God bless you!

Grandpa

Margy and David

Rosie plans on spending much time with Charlotte. She is used to sitting….

Sweet Baby Charlotte on her cooling bed….

Grandma (me)

Please Pray for Baby Charlotte

02 Saturday Nov 2019

Posted by Leanevdp in Baby Charlotte, FF Tidbits

≈ 27 Comments

In your charity, please pray for our son and daughter-in-law, Colin and Elizabeth (better known as Z) and their precious little newborn, Charlotte Rose. Z had to have a C-section and suffered a severe uterine rupture. She is stable. Baby Charlotte may not pull through….

Colin had Epiphany Water with him and we baptized the baby with it. She is in another hospital right now going through what they call a “cooling therapy” for 72 hours. She is a beautiful baby and was 10 lbs. 9 oz. when she was born.

We almost lost Z. But she is stable now.

I will update as we know more.

 

Rosie, Bishop Morlino and the Benedictines

31 Thursday Oct 2019

Posted by Leanevdp in by Leane Vdp, FF Tidbits

≈ 24 Comments

I started writing this article many months ago but couldn’t finish it because…well, it was just a hard time. Then, recently, I was reminded of it when I listened to a Taylor Marshall Podcast where  the good Father Richard Heilman mentioned the support of Bishop Morlino in his efforts to get reverence back in his church and in his Mass at St. Mary’s of Pine Bluff, Wisconsin.

So I dusted off the article and decided to finish it… (with Mother Abbess’ approval).

As Catholics, we know our sufferings are very powerful. A lot of the times we can’t see the benefit, at least not right away. But sometimes God gives us a peek at how efficacious they can be. This is what happened to us in the short time Rosie was in the convent.

It was October 2018 and Rosie was preparing her heart and her trousseau for her entrance into the Benedictine Abbey in Gower, MO…a convent with over forty nuns living the Traditional Benedictine way, with the Traditional Latin Mass offered daily.

Rosie was excited, yet nervous about this new step in her life. In the five years prior she had experienced some rather severe health problems….but had been stable for almost a year. So, Mother Abbess was willing to have Rosie try her vocation.

The first week and a half were pretty typical to a young lady first entering the convent. Rosie was homesick and had the pains of breaking into a life of much prayer and work….getting up very early and going through the motions, rather numb from the newness of it all.

Then one night, Rosie couldn’t make it to Compline. She was sitting on the bench in the hall, watching as the nuns were going the opposite way. She was feeling a familiar, terrible anticipation of what the sisters later called “episodes”…seizure-like episodes. All the nuns were walking away from her and she could feel herself slipping…

A while later, when Rosie woke up, she had five nuns staring at her with concern. Rosie’s world came crashing down on her. She had been through this before and when it got to this point, things would begin to spiral downward, to the point of complete disability.

And that’s what happened.

This time it seemed worse, though, than the other two times, because she was having more “episodes”. It was very concerning to the nuns and they felt like she needed answers.

In the past, we were always put off by the doctors shrugging their shoulders, telling us that these episodes were panic attacks, etc.

Mother Abbess was calling and emailing me giving updates, etc. She called one day to tell me that Rosie would have to go home. I knew it was coming….of course. She was taking up much energy and time for the nuns, who were looking after her around the clock. And she was only a candidate! (I will always be so grateful to the nuns for how they looked after Rosie…they were truly like angels!)

Before Rosie left, Reverend Mother wanted her to have some tests done. Rosie had an MRI and an EEG. Nothing showed up.

The next test to be done was with a heart halter. She would wear it for 48 hours only. In that time, they would hope Rosie would have an episode so they could monitor what the heart was doing….

The second day went by and Rosie’s “episodes” were not cooperating. So the sisters knew they had to do something…they would try to provoke an episode. Through their own doctor, they had learned what a “tilt-table” test was and they decided they would try that.

The few nuns that were Rosie’s caregivers were gathered around her bed. They had her lay flat for a while and then they were going to get her up very quickly.

Rosie was scared. As one can imagine, she did not like these episodes and the thought of bringing one on was a bit, shall we say, terrifying! We needed answers, though, and this was an important step…

It was then that Mother Abbess came in the room and told the nuns that she had just got news that Bishop Morlino was dying.

Bishop Morlino’s name was well-known around Traditional and Conservative circles. Wisconsin (where he was bishop) was very open to having the Traditional Latin Mass and other traditional devotions and orders.

The Bishop had invited these wonderful nuns to start a foundation in his diocese and Mother Abbess and the nuns were on the verge of doing just that! So…hearing that Bishop Morlino was dying was no little thing in their eyes! Some of the nuns began to cry.

Reverend Mother looked at Rosie and said, “We must pray for him.”

Rosie answered, “Well, I guess this is for him, then.”

What happened next was not pretty. It was one of the worst episodes Rosie ever experienced. She went into a semi-consciousness and her body experienced what one would call a “charlie-horse” or a “seizing-up”…and it was all through her body! The episode itself lasted for one hour…from 8:00pm – 9:00pm. The nuns found it quite alarming.

Afterwards, it took the good sisters 3 hours of rubbing and massaging to get Rosie’s stiffened legs and feet to maneuver again. One of the dear nuns slept on the floor at her bedside that night.

Rosie had offered this particular episode for Bishop Morlino. What she was to find out in the next few days was edifying….

On one of the following days, Mother Abbess came into Rosie’s room with tear-filled eyes to tell her what she had found out about Bishop Morlino’s death and how it seemed to coincide with what Rosie had experienced…and offered up for him.

The morning Rosie had her episode, Bishop Morlino became unconscious. The doctors were befuddled because all through the day, he seemed to have a “seizing-up of sorts”…in his body. The doctors didn’t know the reason for it…but it went on throughout the whole day. It was very hard for those who were close to him to witness.

At 8:00pm that night (right when Rosie went into her own “seizing-up” episode…and offered it for the good Bishop), the seizing-up of the Bishop stopped and he was peaceful for the next hour.

At 9:00pm (when Rosie came out of the episode), Bishop Morlino peacefully passed away.

It was as if Rosie had taken that particular suffering of Bishop Morlino for the last hour of his life.

Was it a coincidence…this timeline? I don’t think so. And neither did Mother Abbess and the nuns. As Sister put it, “He definitely had complete peace and alleviation from them lining up with Rosie’s episode.” Even to have access to this kind of information (through Mother Abbess) was a grace.

We were all edified. And for Rosie, whose journey since then (it has been a year since she entered the convent and five years that she has had some kind of mysterious illness), it was one of those epic moments showing the goodness of God and that all suffering is like gold…buying graces for all of our loved ones.

Mother Abbess gave Rosie one of the two crosses she had received from Bishop Morlino…blessed by Pope John Paul II. The other one she had mounted on her Coat of Arms.

It will remain a treasured memory of a faithful Bishop, an amazing Benedictine Convent and one girl’s sufferings.

 

“Love and sacrifice is thus as closely connected as the sun and the light. You can’t love without suffering and suffer without loving. It is with sacrifice that so confirms love “. – Santa Gianna Beretta Molla
Painting by Hermann Kaulbach (1846 – 1909, German)

May your All Hallows Eve be blessed! “‘Hallowe’en,’ as said, means ‘All Hallows’ Evening’ which is as Catholic a holiday as one can get. Let us pray to all the Saints that they might intercede and bring pagans to Christ so they might know the peace that comes from knowing that God loves them so much that He allowed Himself to take on a human nature, to suffer, and to die for them… “

Are you blessed by this site? Consider donating today. Our benefactors are remembered in our daily, family rosaries….
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The Catholic Boy’s Traditional 30-Day Journal!

Dear Catholic Boys,

I wish to inspire you to a greater life of virtue. In order to lead a life of virtue and piety, you need to work on having good, daily habits….habits that will become second nature to you.

Let me tell you a little secret to success in forming these daily practices in your life…It is in having order in your life. This Journal will help you gain that order by staying on track and focused each day.

This Catholic Boy’s Traditional Journal will encourage you on your journey. It will help you to accomplish goals on a daily basis. You will be checking off your spiritual activities, your chores and the other things you should try to get done each day as a good, Catholic boy.

It also has a place to write down things you are thankful for, the people you wish to pray for and other important parts of your day. These good routines will carry you through your life.

My hope for you is that, after you are finished this journal, you will have an idea how to pattern your life with good daily practices.

Start now! Form those good habits! Draw from this journal an outline of what can be your own To-Do List for the rest of your life!

Available here.  

Package Special of Girl’s and Boy’s Journal is here.



Every Legend Has A BeginningThe year is A.D. 299. Diocletian rules the Roman Empire. And the gods have suddenly fallen silent.17-year-old Jurian doesn’t have time for the gods. He’s trying to hold his family together after his father died in disgrace, and piety — even to the Christ — just isn’t practical. But then a ruthless enemy targets his family, forcing Jurian to make a choice: will he pursue the glory he’s always wanted, or will he sacrifice everything to protect a faith that was never really his own….

As the fourth century dawns over Rome, Jurian seeks to regain his honor along the Empire’s brutal northern frontier. When Casca brings back word from the oracle of Apollo, the Emperor decides that the only way to save the Empire is to solve the “Christian problem” once and for all. He needs only one spark to set the world ablaze.

As the storm of fire and blood sweeps across the Empire, Jurian relinquishes his sword and the honor he most desires to fulfill the prophecy along with his destiny.

Saints aren’t born. They are forged.

This post contains affiliate links. Thank you for your support.

Now Let Us See What We Can Do to Become Saints….

27 Sunday Oct 2019

Posted by Leanevdp in FF Tidbits, Spiritual Tidbits

≈ 1 Comment

“But I just don’t feel like I love God!” Ever felt like that? Me, too!

The devil trembles when one gets on their knees to pray when the heart is cold and it is very difficult! The sign of a true lover…one who wills to love!

From An Easy Way to Become a Saint by Father Paul O’Sullivan, 1949

HOW TO LOVE GOD

Now let us see what we can do to become saints. The first, the easiest and the most certain of all means to become a saint is to love God. We cannot possibly do anything holier, anything more pleasing to Him or anything more meritorious for ourselves.

We must learn all about the Love of God, for nothing is more important and more necessary for us, and nothing more conducive to our happiness. To love God is the great work of our lives.

THE VALUE OF AN ACT OF LOVE

The value of one simple act of love is priceless. An act of love is of greater value than a thousand acts of any other virtue, just as one small diamond is worth more than a thousand gold pieces.

Our Blessed Lord told Benigna Consolata that any ordinary Christian can make an act of love in a moment which will have a reward for all eternity. We can make countless acts of love every day without any difficulty.

Secondly, He told her that one act of love gives Him more glory and more pleasure than a thousand horrible blasphemies give Him pain!

Thirdly, love wipes out our sins. One short act of love won for the Thief on the cross the promise that he would be that very day with Christ in Paradise.

On the other hand, all that we do which is not done for the love of God is worthless and will get no reward.

We may toil for long years and receive great praise and honor for our labors, but if our work is not done for love of God, it is worthless.

Thus it is that a poor old woman who tells her beads at the church door, who bears her poverty patiently and who lives a quiet Christian life will have a higher place in Heaven than the great statesmen, the clever generals, the famous politicians, who direct the destinies of vast empires but who do not think of offering their work to God.

IS IT EASY TO LOVE GOD?

Most certainly, for God created us expressly to love Him and to love Him with all our hearts and souls. He is goodness itself. He has done everything to make us love Him.

One might as well ask if it is easy for a child to love its mother, for a wife to love a dear husband, for a friend to love a friend, for a servant to love a good and generous master. It is much easier to love God, who is infinitely good and sweet, God who loves us tenderly and affectionately, who is our dearest and most loving Father, our best, our truest Friend. All that is necessary is to realize His goodness.

The first great Commandment, the very essence of our holy Religion, is to “Love God with all our heart and soul; with all our strength and mind.” This everyone must do. Surely the all-merciful and wise God would never make the very first condition of His beautiful Religion something hard and difficult.

SOME SAY THAT THEY CANNOT LOVE GOD

There are people who say that they cannot love God. When they make an act of love and say, “Oh my God, I love You,” they feel nothing in their hearts to correspond to their words. Their words sound hollow, cold and false. This is what they tell us themselves. Unfortunately, this happens to many, and as a consequence, they are losing every day of their lives great merits and never experience the wonderful happiness they should enjoy in their Religion.

Why cannot they love God?

There are four reasons:

First of all, they never ask God to help them to love Him.

Secondly, they do not realize, as we have said, what God is, His boundless goodness, His sweetness, mercy and love.

Thirdly, they do not understand how much He loves them.

Fourthly, they have no idea of all that emotional love, sentimental love; we speak of the solid love of God which comes from a clear, intelligent understanding of how good and sweet God is.

He Himself tells us: “Taste and see how sweet the Lord is,” and again, “My yoke is sweet, My burden light.”

“The one who knows how to profit by his own errors is the one who makes a success of life. To be discouraged over your mistakes is foolish. To disregard them is equally unwise. To face them fearlessly and try to learn from them how to avoid a mistake next time is part of wisdom.” – Fr. Edward F. Garesche, Catholic Book of Character and Success, 1912, Painting by John George Brown

Sign up for the Giveaway here!


 

A wonderful book showing how the angels have visited people innumerable times in the past, how they do so today, and would do even more if we asked them. Also, how they prevent accidents, comfort us, help us, and protect us from the devils. Contains many beautiful stories about St. Michael, St. Raphael and St. Gabriel; plus, angel stories from St. Gemma Galgani, St. Thomas Aquinas, St. John Bosco, etc.

Save

Save

A very optimistic book showing how an “ordinary” Catholic can become a great saint without ever doing anything “extraordinary”–just by using the many opportunities for holiness that to most people lie hidden in each day. Written with an assurance of success that is totally convincing and infectious. Many easy but infallible means of reaching great sanctity.

This post contains affiliate links. Thank you for your support.

Nuptial Blessing/Dark and Cheerless Homes – True Womanhood

25 Friday Oct 2019

Posted by Leanevdp in FF Tidbits, True Womanhood, A book of Instruction for Women of the World, Rev. Bernard O'Reilly, L.D., 1893

≈ 7 Comments

Mike and Jeanette (daughter)

from True Womanhood – Rev. Bernard O’Reilly

We have just spoken of the Divine assistance, which never fails the soul striving earnestly to fulfill important duties and to do all the good she can.

Think of the contract God entered into with you when you entered into the married state and received at the hands of the Church the nuptial blessing.

You were told that the matrimonial union had its model in the union of Christ with his Church, that his great love for her, which brought Him to the cross, and binds Him to be present on our altars to the end of time, is the type of the great and self-devoted love which husband and wife should ever have for each other.

Did you ever reflect that when you put your hand in your husband’s hand before the Church, giving him your heart and your life thenceforward, that God, who is ever by the side of those who believe and trust in Him, promised you a mighty wealth of grace to be all your own till death!

It enables you to love your husband more and more daily, with a deeper and a holier love, to make your own life like that of the Church towards her Crucified Love, one perpetual act of devotion and self-sacrifice – giving him in his every need your own strong love to sustain, and comfort, and strengthen him, taking up his cross courageously, and cheering him to labor and to suffer, because you both know, or ought to know, that God is ever with you.

Were your lot cast and your home built in a tree-less plain amid a dry and barren country, how you would thank the man who would dig for you at your very door a well so deep and so unfailing that its cool and sweet waters would ever flow forth, winter and summer, for yourself and your dear ones!

Father VanderPutten and Father Lillard

And yet the great graces attached by Christ to the worthy reception of the divine sacrament of matrimony, from within your home, wherever you chance to be, a well of water for the soul’s health and strength so divinely prepared, that no length of time can exhaust it.
Why do you not drink of the waters of your own well?

We have just said how much the true woman has it in her power to do — no matter how poor her home or hard her husband’s lot — if she only knew both the extent of her power to cheer his lot and the sacredness of the obligation which binds her to do it. We now appeal to the experience and generosity of the wife, mother, and sister of the laboring man.
There was a rapid sketch previously of the comforts and delights of the poor hard-working man’s home, when love and devotion were toiling to prepare a sweet rest for him when the day’s work was ended.

DARK AND CHEERLESS HOMES

But have we seriously thought of the number of homes made dark, and cheerless, and desolate, and hateful to the husband, the brother, the son, and the daughter, too, by the absence of that bright spirit of love, which works at home from dawn till sunset, to have everything warm and pleasant and restful for the weary ones coming back after their eight and ten hours of labor?

If the devoted, God-fearing, sweet-tempered woman is rewarded by seeing her dear ones unhappy when kept away from the bright home she makes for them, and most happy when seated near the warm hearth and charmed with her smile and her voice, it is no less certain that the selfish, untidy, ill-tempered, and bitter-tongued woman succeeds in making home unbearable for everyone who is dependent on her.

Why is it that so many men — thrifty, hard-working, made to be and disposed to be devoted husbands and exemplary fathers — are driven at the end of their day of toil to find — not rest, indeed, nor recreation — in the neighbor’s house — but some distraction from the thought of their own comfortless home, some rest from the din and lash of the ceaseless tongue which is their torment?

Why are so many, at length, driven to the tavern to seek forgetfulness in intoxication? Is it not because woman forgets to be loving and devoted and ingenious in the sweet arts of making her fire burn brighter on the hearth, and her own person more attractive to her dear ones by some little ornament put on to welcome the laborers at evening, and her humble meal made more appetizing by some of the many cheap seasonings that the poorest can buy, and her whole house shining with cleanliness, and filled with the sweet music of her own delighted tones?

Ah! love has stores from which can be borrowed without stint, and at little cost, kind words and warm smiles and a thousand other things which go straight to the heart thirsting for the endearments, the joys, and the repose of home.

Why will you not be a queen in your own little kingdom, wife, mother, sister, and make all hearts subject to you by this ascendancy of your goodness and devotion.
There are worse consequences still — especially in cities and manufacturing towns — which are caused by the want of the wifely and motherly qualities described above.

Young people of both sexes who are forced — perhaps from early boyhood or girlhood — to seek for employment outside of their home, feel an imperative need of the rest and comfort and love of their own fireside, when the end of their long day of toil has come.

Blessed is the mother who knows how to make their home bright and warm for them! But what shall we say of her who cares not to do so? Or who makes her home intolerable to her dear ones?

This much is certain, that in our overcrowded cities, if not elsewhere, thousands upon thousands of hard-working young people are driven into dangerous company and corrupting amusements because they have no home to love, to be proud of, in which to find the repose of heart and body so needful for their age especially.

A mother holds her baby in her arms, looks up to God, and knows that she, by months of suffering and patience, has co-operated with Him in making and bringing into the world a little body housing a priceless soul. A father stands above his new-born son resting in the arms of his wife, and knows as he picks him up and weighs him tenderly that he has shared with God the Father His very fatherhood; for this mite of humanity, immortal in destiny, is truly his son. Mother and father together have co-operated with God in the astonishing creation of a human being. -Fr. Daniel A. Lord, 1950’s

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Called by her people Isabella la Catolica, she was by any standard one of the greatest women of all history. A saint in her own right, she married Ferdinand of Aragon, and they forged modern Spain, cast out the Moslems, discovered the New World by backing Columbus, and established a powerful central government in Spain. This story is so thrilling it reads like a novel. Makes history really come alive. Highly readable and truly great in every respect!
Father weaves a tapestry of the Church’s teaching on the unity of the members of Christ’s Mystical Body using profound and picturesque meditations on the seven sorrows of the Blessed Mother:
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You Can Have a Happy Family (Conclusion) – Rev. George A. Kelly

18 Wednesday Sep 2019

Posted by Leanevdp in Catholic Family Handbook, Rev. George A. Kelly, Catholic Home Life, Family Life, FF Tidbits

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

Being a good father, domestic happiness, Good Catholic children, happy home, mutual love necessary for happy home, Teach children about God

Artist: Lucelle Raad

From The Catholic Family Handbook, Rev. George A. Kelly. 1950’s

Part One

Part Two

The Triangle of God, Parents and Child

It cannot be stressed too often that you can leave a heritage of good for centuries simply by leading a holy life as a parent.

For example, if you have six children, it is possible that within your lifetime you will have twenty-five or thirty grandchildren. They in turn may have more than 100 children, and within a century perhaps 1,000 lives will reflect your influence to some extent. If you have been a good parent, thanks to you they may be good Christians–your advocates in heaven. If you are a bad example, you may leave a large number of evildoers as your contribution to God and humanity.

As the Catholic Bishops of the United States pointed out in 1950 in their memorable formal statement, “The Child: Citizen of Two Worlds,” the first requirement of good Catholic family life is that the children must know God. However, as the Bishops emphasized, “there is a vast difference between ‘knowing about God’ and ‘knowing God.’ The difference is made by personal experience.

It is not enough that the child be given the necessary truths about God. They ought to be given in such a way that he will assimilate them and make them a part of himself. God must become as real to him as his own father and mother.

God must not remain an abstraction. If He does, He will not be loved; and if He is not loved, then all the child’s knowledge about Him will be sterile.

Where love is, there too is service. (‘If you love me, keep my commandments.’) That is Christ’s test and it must be applied to the child. He should be brought to see God’s commandments and precepts as guideposts which give an unerring direction to his steps. In this work, the Church, the family and the school all have a part to play.”

How can you teach your child to know God? First, by inspiring him to love and serve God by your own daily actions. He will be quick to imitate what he sees and hears at home.

If good example is not forthcoming, he will become confused by the contradiction between what you teach and what you practice. His confusion will be compounded when he goes to a school where religion is taught. There he will learn to reverence the name of God, but at home he may hear God’s name used irreverently in petulance and anger.

At school he will learn to get along with his fellow pupils, but at home he may be allowed to offend and wrangle with his brothers and sisters. At school he will be taught strict precepts of honesty and justice, while at home he may hear boasts of sharp business practices and clever evasions of truth.

Disturbed by these contradictions and torn by conflicting loyalties to home and school, he will lose confidence in his parents or teachers or both.

Only two courses are open to your child. He will be either God-centered or self-centered. Every young child seeks to satisfy every selfish whim. Training yours to consider God and others before he acts is one of the most challenging tasks you face. Here is where you can draw on the life of Christ.

If you teach your child to deny his selfish whims in imitation of the obedient and patient Savior, he will not only have a supernatural motive for his actions, but God will have a central place in his affections. Only then can he grow up to his full spiritual stature.

You can find joy in your children. While you should never forget that you are your children’s foremost teacher–and the most important influence they will ever know–your family life will lose its true perspective if you overemphasize the sacrifices you must make to educate them. For your joy in your children should outweigh by far any disadvantages they may cause. In them you will find your own happiness.

Your children give dimension to your love as a couple. Conjugal love, which can be selfish and isolated, takes a great stride with the birth of a baby. Many young mothers have said, “John and I did not really know what our love could grow to be until we held successive children in our arms.”

The greatest aid to your own maturity as human beings is the rearing of your children. St. John Chrysostom remarked, “Can there be a more responsible task than to mold the human spirit or form the morals of young people? I consider that man greater than any painter or sculptor who neglects not the molding of the souls of young people.”

In your children you will rediscover your own youth. Their growth process will rekindle your own sense of wonder and enthusiasm. Johnny asks, “Dad, why is the sky blue?” And Dad, who hadn’t cared, takes a new and longer look.

What have you to show for having lived, if not your children? At forty or fifty years of age, an adult generally reaches the limits of income and social standing. Yet parents continue to grow with their sense of fulfillment in the achievements of their children.

And as if these satisfactions were not enough, parents through their offspring have a grand opportunity to spread the faith. They are real missionaries in their own home. They can say at the end of their lives as Christ said of His Apostles: “Those whom Thou hast given Me, I guarded; and not one of them perished.” (John 17 :12)

There is no doubt that genuine Catholic family life is among the best family life to be found in the United States. For Catholic married couples are one of the few large groups in the country who have consistently sacrificed themselves to have more children.

And the large numbers of their children who, properly trained, have left Catholic homes to take up responsible roles in the armed services, corporate economic life, the labor movement, and the public offices of government, reflect credit on those parents and on the Church.

In the Catholic home there is that modern rarity–fidelity between husband and wife. There is great reverence for parents by the children, great protection of weaker members by the stronger, and a great awareness of the dignity and rights of every member of the family.

The Catholic woman has attained a height of respect and authority which cannot be found anywhere else, and the chief factor in her improvement has been the Church’s teaching on chastity, conjugal equality, the sacredness of motherhood, and the supernatural end of the family, in imitation of the Holy Family of Nazareth. But even as we uphold the Catholic woman as wife and mother, we also uphold the pre-eminent place of the husband and father in the home.

You must not forget that the vigor of your Catholicism rests on the stability and goodness of your family life. Of course, the Church knows better than anyone else that in proclaiming Catholic family ideals she is dealing with human weakness and the tendency to selfishness and sin.

Like a good mother, she also forgives and embraces those who momentarily betray those ideals. But unlike others, she will never admit that those weaknesses diminish or vitiate God’s place for fathers and mothers or call sin virtue or pretend that weakness is strength.

The reward for all your efforts is the Call of Christ on Judgment Day:

“Come, ye blessed of My Father.”

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“I insist that it is every woman’s duty to know, or to acquire some practical knowledge of housekeeping, so that she may be ready for any emergency. Her fitness for it will be a perpetual source of satisfaction to her, for there is nothing more self-satisfying than to feel that one is capable; it gives confidence, strength, and self-reliance.”- Annie S. Swan, Courtship and Marriage And the Gentle Art of Home-Making, 1893
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Let’s keep our young girls engaged in the Faith! Let’s teach them how to be organized, how to prioritize, how to keep on top of, first, the Spiritual things in their life, and then the other daily duties that God requires of them!

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This next 30 days will be invaluable to them…to learn life skills, to have the satisfaction of checking off the activities they finish, to learn to be thankful for the  good things God has given us, to offer up their day for someone in need, etc.

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With his facile pen and from the wealth of his nation-wide experience, the well-known author treats anything and everything that might be included under the heading of home education: the pre-marriage training of prospective parents, the problems of the pre-school days down through the years of adolescence. No topic is neglected. “What is most praiseworthy is Fr. Lord’s insistence throughout that no educational agency can supplant the work that must be done by parents.” – Felix M. Kirsch, O.F.M.

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Necessary advice to Catholic parents building a Catholic home. Reliable advice that is almost completely lost today, from people who know how it’s done. How to make it. How to live it. How to keep it. This book covers every aspect of Catholicizing your home–from spiritual matters like prayer and catechism to nuts and bolts topics like Keeping the Family Budget, Games and Toys, Harmony between School and Home, Family Prayers, Good Reading in the Home, Necessity of Home Life and much more

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Learning Life Lessons in the Oddest Places

11 Wednesday Sep 2019

Posted by Leanevdp in by Leane Vdp, FF Tidbits, Prayers

≈ 2 Comments

Throwback Thursday post….

It was one of those normal days…. housework, homeschooling, and the usual hubbub of grandchildren.

Vincent had been at work and came home late. He sat down at the table and we gave him his dinner that we had been keeping warm for him.

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Painting by Norman Rockwell

That’s when he dropped the bombshell…”I picked up this guy in Topeka. He’s homeless and needs a place to stay until he gets something else”.

Now my husband is known for his charity. It exceeds the norm and the rest of us tremble when he comes up with his next venture in kindness. This was one of those trembling times.

I really struggle at times like this. I have my run-of-the-mill fears like any mother.

I know God expects us to go the extra mile. But what about my kids…..!!!???

I uncomfortably agree to (I will call him George) staying in the addition (which is attached to the house) for a couple of days. And so that is what he does.

George eventually finds his way to an apartment and hubby employs him. This guy has had a rough past, that is for sure. He traveled with a carnival and life was very, very messy. You really have to wonder if this is going to be the time when he really gives it all up.

Hubby is hopeful, I am skeptical….

In the meantime, we have some good times with George. He plays volleyball with us, eats with us and just chews the fat with all of us as we sit around visiting.

One day we were talking. I don’t know if he was telling us about his own relationship with his deceased wife or if we were just talking about relationships in general. Our friend said something that has resonated with me since then. It was very profound and has depths of meaning in it.

It could really be a motto for any husband or wife. He said, “When my wife and I were having an argument, and things were getting out of control, I would ask myself, ‘Whoa, George! Is this really that important? Besides…..Do I want to be RIGHT? Or do I want to be HAPPY?'”

I looked at him surprised. I had never heard it said that way. That was good. And it came from George….he just didn’t seem the type to utter such wisdom.

How often through the years we will have to live by this very motto that this poor, homeless man tried to live by in his better years.

It’s called overcoming our pride.

When we’re having one of our differences and he is really getting under our skin and we know our point of view makes more sense and we push it until it becomes a full-blown argument ….
We need to ask ourselves, “Do I want to be right? Or do I want to be happy?” 

When we’re upset, we can stew about stuff, give him the silent treatment and wait for him to apologize but really when it comes right down to it….we just want to be happy.

The differences we are experiencing don’t matter as much as loving one another…as keeping that friendliness and intimacy that is so important between husband and wife.

So we need to swallow our pride and apologize. Or if we have nothing to apologize for, just try to forget it and let him know you love him.

And things are so much better.

It is not worth it.  Let’s get over ourselves and learn some humility….

As for our friend, George, he stuck around for about 6 months. Vincent gave him his small truck and he got it impounded because he returned to his life of drinking. Last I heard he was evicted from his apartment and has moved on.

I will never forget him, though, every time I think of his life lesson.  Maybe say a prayer for George today…. God help him.

LITANY OF HUMILITY

O Jesus! meek and humble of heart, Hear me.
From the desire of being esteemed,

Deliver me, Jesus.

From the desire of being loved…Deliver me, Jesus
From the desire of being extolled …
From the desire of being honored …
From the desire of being praised …
From the desire of being preferred to others…
From the desire of being consulted …
From the desire of being approved …
From the fear of being humiliated …
From the fear of being despised…
From the fear of suffering rebukes …
From the fear of being calumniated …
From the fear of being forgotten …
From the fear of being ridiculed …
From the fear of being wronged …
From the fear of being suspected …

That others may be loved more than I,
Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it.

That others may be esteemed more than I …Jesus, grant me the grace to desire it.
That, in the opinion of the world,
others may increase and I may decrease …
That others may be chosen and I set aside …
That others may be praised and I unnoticed …
That others may be preferred to me in everything…
That others may become holier than I,
provided that I may become as holy as I should…

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“God designed men and women differently. This means your spouse communicates differently. With your man, try spending time just ‘being together’ without an agenda to talk or interact. As he does shoulder to shoulder activities with you, he experiences a special camaraderie and trust. He will relax and feel comfortable to talk about the deeper issues confronting him.”-Emmerson Eggerichs, Love and Respect

Painting by Gregory Frank Harris

Eternal Rest Grant Unto Them, O Lord….

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A very valuable book for the guys plucked out of the past and reprinted. It was written in 1894 by Fr. Bernard O’Reilly and the words on the pages will stir the hearts of the men to rise to virtue and chivalry…. Beautifully and eloquently written!

A very beautiful book, worthy of our attention. In it, you will find many pearls of wisdom for a woman striving to be the heart of the home, an inspiration to all who cross her path. You will be inspired to reconsider the importance of your role of wife and mother! Written by Rev. Bernard O’Reilly in 1894, the treasures found within its pages ring true and remain timeless…

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