Practical Expectations – Cleaning the Clutter

I get a lot out of Emilie Barnes’ ideas for taking care of clutter and organizing your life and your home. Here are a few tidbits for you to take to heart and incorporate into your hectic schedule….to make it less hectic! 🙂

101 Way to Clean Out the Clutter – Emilie Barnes

Unfinished Business

Do you ever feel like you’re running in circles? Do you put off new pursuits because you are spending your precious time juggling projects that are never completed?

Make a list of five projects you would love to finish. Tackle these one at a time. You’ll find that as you clear away the unfinished business, you’ll be free to reach for new pursuits.

Don’t delay your goals and aspirations. Which terminal projects are eating up the most time? Give yourself an absolute deadline to complete each one or consider letting go of the project altogether.

Which projects are the most overwhelming and which have the highest priority? If you take care of a couple that are time sensitive, you’ll give yourself breathing room and a sense of accomplishment.

Consider the ones that absolutely must get done because others are counting on them or because they have a deadline. There’s your starting place!

Practical Expectations

It’s nice to want things done right, but not if you’re crippled by the pressure. High expectations can lead to inactivity when you’re overwhelmed. By all means do the best job you can do in a reasonable amount of time. However, don’t get bogged down by perfectionism.

You may know the difference in the finished product, but your friends and guests probably won’t know or care if it’s not perfectly done.

If you’re preparing for guests, determine the cleaning that must be done versus the cleaning you want to get done. You’ll find that if you clean the areas your guests will be visiting and just tidy other areas, you’ll have a very welcoming environment.

Always keep in mind that you want your home to be inviting, not sterile and immaculate. Aim for inviting rather than ideal, and you’ll enjoy the time before and during your guests’ visits. You’ll be a much more sane hostess.

Break It Up

To accomplish a big task, break it into a few smaller parts—these become “instant tasks” that you can easily handle. It’s the big items that throw us and leave us in a panic.

Think of one project that you have put off because it seemed too big to take on after a busy day or in the middle of a hectic one.

For example, let’s choose cleaning out the refrigerator as your dreaded project. Can you give it 15 minutes? Even the craziest of days usually have a few breaks in them that could be put to good use.

Set a timer and work like mad for those 15 minutes evaluating leftovers, checking expiration dates, and wiping off shelves.

Tomorrow, set the timer and toss out old vegetables, refresh the ice trays, and rinse the meat and produce bins. In a day or two you’ll have invested two or three 15-minute sessions and completed the larger task of cleaning your refrigerator.

When Are You Most Productive?

Each of us operates efficiently at different times of the day. Pay attention to when you feel the most energetic and alert. Take a few days to observe which time periods and what parts of each day are best for you when it comes to cleaning, working, juggling multiple tasks, focusing on one, and being creative.

It might help to write out what you observe—it could be surprising. Maybe you always linger over breakfast and dishes to draw out the morning when it’s actually your most energetic time and should tackle a couple work projects.

Don’t use this awareness as an excuse to not perform well during your off period of the day. Instead, use it to be good to yourself and to enhance your life, productivity, sense of balance, and enjoyment.

Schedule taxing chores for the hours when your mind is sharpest. Do the physical chores when you have the most energy. File papers or sweep the floor when you need a task that doesn’t require too much thought and evaluation. This principle is good for work as well as at home.

“Regularity in meals is another thing the wise housekeeper will insist upon in her abode. Regularity and punctuality, how delightful they are, and how they ease the roll of the domestic wheels! A punctual and tidy woman makes a punctual and tidy home.” -Annie S. Swan, Courtship and Marriage And the Gentle Art of Home-Making, 1894

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Home management expert and bestselling author Emilie Barnes comes to the aid of every clutter keeper with 101 simple ideas to rid rooms of piles, stacks, and disarray…

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My Rule of Life

Before I begin this little excerpt about my own Rule of Life, I would like to say that I have one maxim I go by, reminding myself of it often. It is: “People are more important than things…and schedules, and accomplishments, etc.”

That being said, my thoughts on a Rule of Life:

I never heard of this term before until I picked up the book A Mother’s Rule of Life several years ago. I lived it, to a certain extent, but didn’t know what it was called.
One thing I so appreciated from that book was the part on the Spiritual Life…she talked about tithing your time to God.
She suggested a certain amount of time, 10% of your waking hours, that you dedicate to God …which I thought was pretty neat. It gave me something to go by and some kind of a goal.
It was then that I began to “journal” or write down my list on the spiritual things I wanted to accomplish throughout each day. And I would check them off as I went along. I was hung up on the numbers for awhile (making sure I got my “tithing” in) and then eventually that part fell by the wayside.
This began a habit in me that I have practiced for many years now…the writing down of what I wanted to accomplish spiritually each day. And this list-making reached out into other aspects of my life.
I firmly believe the spiritual duties we do each day are the foundation of any Rule of Life. It is at the top of my page each day in my Journal.

Here’s what mine looks like:
Morning Prayers (private)
Daily Mass, if possible (with children)
Mercy Chaplet (with children)
Family Rosary (with family)
Night Prayers (private)

In order to accomplish our spiritual things and the other things we need to do each day, we need to take care of our body.
How will we say our 15 minutes of Morning Prayer (if that’s what we have committed to) if we don’t get to sleep at a decent hour? It is valuable to put a time for rising on our list and sticking to it as much as we can. This will be difficult if the time for going to bed is ignored.
In the evening, there may be extenuating circumstances in raising a family…but we have to admit, a lot of the time we bring our fatigue on ourselves (talking to myself here). We lollygag at night, putting off going to bed for whatever reason and then, guess what?? We are too tired the next morning to get up and start the day right, with the first thing on our list….Morning Prayers. And then it goes downhill from there….Blah. So, remember, your accomplishments during the day and how well the day turns out begin the evening before!

This is what my “bodily” or “health” section looks like. It’s simple and doable:
Exercise (T-Tapp, a walk, tread milling, etc.)
Take supplements
Water (half a person’s body weight in ounces)

(You can add what time to bed, what time for rising and anything else that is important to you in this category)
Check them off as you do them!

Next is your household duties. The important stuff…and write it down. Mine probably looks different than yours does because I have girls who take over some of the big things. Here’s an example of what yours can begin with:

1.Meals
2. School
3.Laundry
(Add to this section of your list as you see fit but just the important things…the MUST-DO’S.)

Keep things picked up in between time…maybe plan a 20 minute hoopla with the kids as everyone takes a room. This could be done more than once a day…and added to your list.

And then, added to the bottom of your list….one big thing, like clean fridge. ….but only for 15 minutes!

And do it for 15 minutes each day until it is done! Set the timer. Oftentimes we can’t make it through a whole big job…and we tend to avoid it if it is big. So…break it up into doable slots of time. I am always amazed at how much I get done in 15 minutes and how quickly these big jobs get accomplished. A great feeling, indeed!

I think this is valuable…..Zig Ziglar (who is a big guru in the positive motivational field) said to plan into your schedule time with your family. Yes, I know as busy mothers, we are always with our family, working hard for them each day, rubbing shoulders with them, etc. But maybe we could write down…20 minutes with kids…and spend that time building Lego, reading a story, telling a story, crafting or whatever. Those are the kind of things that, built into your rule of life, you will never regret.
Write.it.down.

So a recap of your categories on your list:
Spiritual Duties
Bodily Health
Most Necessary Housework Things we Can’t NOT Do (always excepting extenuating circumstances)
One Big Thing (for 15 minutes)
Time With Family                                                                                                  Other things you’d like to accomplish                                            

Just a mention…try to get in a little breather for yourself each day, whether it is doing a bit of crocheting or looking up a special website online. It’s important we recharge, too!

All the other little things you have to accomplish each day can revolve around this list. This is your go-to, your foundation. It won’t be perfect. That’s ok. And you can write the little things down, too. It’s great when we can check things off! And if you don’t get them done that day, put them on the next day and try again!

An Example List:

This may not be detailed enough for you. Here is the link to Holly Pierlot’s A Mother’s Rule of Life. It has been years since I read it, my daughter-in-law is reading it and loving it!

A quote from My Prayer Book, Father Lasance:
“One of the means,” says a spiritual writer, “of acquiring and perfecting in us the interior life, which raises a man above the merely terrestrial and animal life to the height of the divine life in Jesus Christ consists in adopting and following a rule of life, which does not leave the employment of our time to caprice, but assigns to each moment its own proper duty”
“Let all things be done decently and according to order.” says St. Paul. (1Cor. xiv. 40)
“Where there is no rule there is no order,” says Father Hamon. “We live by caprice and fancies. With a rule of life, on the contrary, all is done in an orderly manner; each duty has its proper time set apart for it; nothing is forgotten; nothing is done in haste or in a careless manner.
Thanks to a rule of life, all is done well; and that which is true in regard to order is equally so in regard to practices of piety.
With a rule of life they are done with exactitude; without a rule they have no fixed hour; we defer them, then we again defer them, and we finish by omitting them entirely.”

Creating a home filled with order and cleanliness (as much as is possible in your state of life and in your unique circumstances 😊)communicates a heart that is ordered and pure. Take a moment today to make your home more simply organized and see how the sweet savor blesses those around you. -Emilie Barnes, Keep It Simple for Busy Women http://amzn.to/2y2JoN3

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To the modern mind, the concept of poverty is often confused with destitution. But destitution emphatically is not the Gospel ideal. A love-filled sharing frugality is the message, and Happy Are You Poor explains the meaning of this beatitude lived and taught by Jesus himself. But isn’t simplicity in lifestyle meant only for nuns and priests? Are not all of us to enjoy the goodness and beauties of our magnificent creation? Are parents to be frugal with the children they love so much?

 

 

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Cleaning the Clutter – It’s a Family Matter

by Emilie Barnes, 101 Ways to Clean the Clutter

It’s a Family Matter

Involve the whole family. Learn to delegate jobs and responsibilities to other members of the family. Work with the children to de-clutter their bedrooms and bath. Dad can also be a big help, especially when you begin to clear out all the unused stuff in the garage. Set a date for a cleaning bonanza and purchase all the cleaning supplies in advance.

As a surprise for your family cleaning day, purchase a fun organizational tool for each family member—one that suits their individual personality. Or plan a relay cleaning day. Designate several projects that need to be done and assign a person to each task. Set a timer for 30 minutes and start working. When the buzzer sounds, each family member rotates to a different chore station.

De-Cluttering and Simple Secrets by Emilie Barnes

A Chance to Change

It’s time to stop rationalizing why we keep all of the junk in our homes. In order to say “I don’t need that anymore,” you have to get organized from the inside out.

Maybe you like stuff around you because you had chaos around you as a child. Or maybe the clutter on the outside reflects how jumbled up you feel in your heart and mind.

Give yourself the very wonderful gift of change. Even if this scares you a little bit…keep moving forward. You’ll see great results.

As you work toward making your home a refuge and a sanctuary, you’ll notice how much more calm you feel inside. It works the other way too. If you take time to pray, be silent, and become peaceful in your heart, you’ll want your surroundings to match.

Do You Really Need It?

Our old habits of buying unneeded stuff must be conquered. Advertisements, stores, and even friends and neighbors tell you that you need this and you need that! But those who want to simplify and live life in rich ways have to stand up and be counted—you really don’t need that.

De-cluttering is simply stating “I don’t need that” as you go from room to room. When this becomes your fight song, it makes it so much easier to cut back on all the excess that causes clutter.

Try it in a room today. Look at that collection of baskets you have that gathers more dust than compliments. Sort through them as you repeat your new song of simplicity. Yes, keep a couple, but be sure you keep ones that are truly useful and get rid of the umpteen ones that are not.

Go to your clothes closet. Ask yourself, “What haven’t I worn in months?” Why hang on to something that needs to be hung up in an already full closet?

Sell? Donate? Toss Out?

Uncluttering your home doesn’t mean that you throw everything in the trash. In fact there are several other good alternatives.

Here are a few:

-have a garage sale

-donate items to a worthy organization that helps the needy

-donate to your church’s needs

-give to needy friends you know

-package items up and send useful ones to a missionary supported by your church

-advertise on eBay

The items you don’t need could be the items others are hoping to have and use. The best form of recycling turns a waste of space into an opportunity,

Breaking Down the Big Ones

Don’t look at the whole mess, but break the big tasks down into smaller tasks. That way you aren’t overwhelmed with what you see. Psychologically, a small part is easier to assimilate than the whole.

For example, start with one room at a time. Then focus on one corner at a time. Look at small projects within that area. The most blatant projects are often the “procrastination piles”—the items, papers, or projects that accumulate in corners and on dressers, chairs, or any surface area for that matter!

You intend to get to these eventually so you leave them out in the open, but soon they are not visual reminders—only eye sores.

Tackle these. Decide which projects should still happen, which could be tossed, which are outdated, and which could be delegated. Small steps will transform your home in big ways.

Simple Secrets

*Make the inside of your refrigerator a feast for the eye. Use see-through through containers for fruit. A bouquet of parsley in a small glass adds a fresh touch. Even a small bowl of flowers can bless the eye of anyone looking for a snack.

*After baking an apple pie, set it on the counter to cool-and perfume fume the house. Try piling some fresh apples next to it for a delightful “before and after” look.

*Serve your butter in a white pottery crock. Whip it with an equal amount of olive oil to reduce calories and stretch the butter. It will fluff up beautifully.

*Freeze grapes and roll them in granulated sugar. Store in a glass bowl or on a pretty plate and toss in a salad or use as a garnish.

*For a creative surprise, serve breakfast for dinner. Our family loves waffles with toppings of fruit, nuts, coconut, raisins, jam, maple syrup, and yogurt.

*Store foods in ways that allow them to be decorative as well as useful. Display fruit in a basket or special bowl on the kitchen table or drain board. Stack potatoes and onions in a basket and use it to enliven an out-of-the way corner of your counter or floor.

*Break the iceberg lettuce habit when it comes to salad. Combine spinach, leaf lettuce, romaine, or red-tip lettuce together with bean sprouts, mushrooms, red onion rings, and your favorite dressing for a fresher, healthier salad. Or try adding red cabbage and a sprinkle of goat cheese or freshly grated Parmesan.

*Garlic adds great flavor to many dishes and is very healthful. Add it to soups, chicken, roasts, and Crock-Pot meals. Try hanging fresh garlic on a rope in your kitchen-and use it.

*Popovers and other quick breads let you put fresh bread on the table in a hurry. Or stir up a batch of blueberry or cranberry muffins for a sweet and colorful bread treat.

*Next time you make buttered toast, sprinkle on some cinnamon and sugar. An old idea, but when was the last time you did it?

*Put your olive oil and wine vinegar in pretty decanters by your stove. I like to make a seasoned olive oil by combining two dried red peppers (the long, thin kind), the seeds from two more red peppers, one tablespoon each of rosemary and thyme, and four cloves of garlic in a quart jar and covering with olive oil. Or just put a few cloves of garlic in a glass bottle and fill with oil.

*Add one-half teaspoon ground cinnamon and a pinch of ground cloves to your coffee grounds next time you brew. Drink out of your favorite cup and saucer and enjoy the fresh flavor and smell.

*Use a pepper mill and grind your own pepper fresh at the table.

*On a slow afternoon, put on soft music and browse through your favorite recipe book for ideas and inspiration.

*Set aside a Saturday morning to learn how to use one of those appliances stored away in a low cabinet. Are you secretly afraid of your pressure cooker? Have you never cooked anything but frozen dinners in your microwave? Has your food processor gathered dust since you bought it? Take the time to find out what these helpers can do-and then decide whether you really require their services. You may be surprised by what goes and what stays.

*Hang a basket or two-or thirty!-from the ceiling beam or over a wall in the kitchen or breakfast room.

*”Dejunk” your kitchen 15 minutes at a time. The room will look more spacious, and you’ll be more inspired to spend time there.

*Help a child plant some seeds in a small container and place it in your kitchen window to sprout.

*Buy a meat thermometer. You’ll use it often.

*Instead of buying regular applesauce, buy apples. A bowl of homemade made applesauce with a sprinkle of cinnamon is a healthful, easy-to-make to-make snack or dessert.

*Instead of putting the catsup bottle on the table, serve catsup in a little crock with a spoon. And don’t forget to recycle the bottle.

*Take time today to smell the roses-and the soup!

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Our Lady’s Love of Domestic Life

by Mother Mary Potter, Catholic Family Magazine, Australia

We do not think enough of this love of Mary for simple domestic life; indeed, we often forget it entirely. Yet it is one of the most beautiful traits in her character.

It seems the very essence of Mary, so to speak, to be simple, to perform the common, ordinary duties of a wife and a mother, and to love them. Her Heart ever craved after one thing, namely, to walk simply before God and to be perfect, whatever might be the circumstances or condition of her life.

But He gave her what her Heart most desired, the simple ordinary life of women, that she might live this life in her sweet, simple way, and sanctify it for the multitude of women who should follow her, that she might leave an example to her children, so sweet, so captivating, that they hereafter might love to walk in her footsteps; that she might be the pattern of a perfect woman to them.

And such indeed she is, and so sweet is her example, that the world seems made holier, purer by the very name of Mary.

Every good Catholic household seems penetrated with her influence, and perfumed by her presence. Her statues and pictures are everywhere, and everywhere remind us of herself, the pure simple Mary, the holy woman, the gentle Virgin, the Mother above all mothers.

But she ever comes before us in her own simplicity, that simplicity of Mary which is unlike anything else. There is nothing extraordinary about her in her outward conduct and demeanor, nothing excessive, nothing exaggerated.

She is a pure, true woman, lovely beyond conception; she is Mary, unlike aught but herself.

But for all that, holy Mother, we wish to be like thee, as far as we may; we wish to imitate thee; we will follow thee in the way thou hast shown us; our lives shall be in conformity to thine, so far as our weakness will permit.

If thou hadst done extraordinary things we might still have looked up to thee, longed to imitate thee, and should not have been able: but thou hast lived upon this earth as other women live, working no miracles, doing nothing marvelous, but for the greater part in the simple discharge of the duties of a quiet peaceful home, only so perfectly, with such exquisite purity of intention, with such ardent charity.

We, too, desire to live as thou hast done; thou wilt surely help thy children, tender Mother that thou art.

Mary is great as the Immaculate Virgin, she is great as the marvelous Mother of God, she is great as she stands on Calvary, offering the greatest sacrifice ever creature offered to God.

She offered what was her own, for Jesus was hers, He was her Son.

Mary is great as Queen of Heaven, but Mary is equally great in the eyes of God in the simple actions of her daily life, since in them she did God’s will as perfectly as she did when she consented to become His Mother.

We love Thee, Mary, as we watch thee, so quiet, so humble performing thy daily round of duties.

Each action was an offering, a gift, well pleasing to the Most High, each action was performed carefully, earnestly, as though it were an act of religious worship, and so indeed it was in Mary’s eyes.

Mary sanctified the daily acts of life, and in this her children can and must follow her example.

God is everywhere. He is adorable everywhere. He should be adored everywhere. We work in His presence always. It is with this thought ever in our minds that we should work.

It will not then matter to us what our work is; the smallest action will be performed as carefully as the greatest, and our life will be beautiful in the sight of God. Yes; it is not always what appears to us to be grand actions that are grand in the sight of God.

They are indeed grand when performed purely for the love of God; but these same heroic actions may be done from unworthy, selfish, interested motives, and not be so pleasing to God as some most commonplace, everyday actions proceeding from a purer motive.

Who can understand the joy of God in His saints, whose days are full of such noble actions as these?

We, too, naturally admire what is heroic and noble. See the applause that Grace Darling won for her one brave act in saving the lives of the poor, shipwrecked sailors; but that may have been no more pleasing in the sight of God than the simple daily actions of many a chosen soul, both in the world and in the cloister, dear to the Heart of God, “for man seeth those things that appear, but the Lord beholdeth the heart.”

If we could see our lives as those in heaven see them; if we could but see how beautiful to the angels and saints the lives appear of those who on earth are “all for God,” how differently should we feel, how differently should we act.

Do we think as we should of the quiet, simple life of Mary, full of its everyday, ordinary actions?

We have read of the saint who saw how a poor laborer was adding to his merit and his future crown in heaven by every brick he laid. Then what must Mary have done? What was the purity of intention of that poor bricklayer laying his bricks compared to the intention with which Mary worked at her needlework, drew water from the well for her little household, cleaned the house and its humble furniture, ant did all that was necessary for the simple poor cottage at Nazareth.

The angels never tired of gazing at their Queen as she went from one duty to the other in the simple routine of her life. She grew more and more wonderful to them, and they loved human life, seeing it such as they had ne’er before seen it, “life as Mary lived it.”

Let Mary’s children resolve to imitate their Mother; let them, wherever they may be, whether in the world or the cloister, resolve to imitate Mary by their cheerful, careful performance of their daily duties. Our Mother  is looking lovingly upon us. Let us think of her sweet, smiling face; let us earn from her the crown she is holding for us, which she is so anxious to bestow upon us, the reward the good God will give to all who are faithful to Him, and persevere in His service to the end.

Let us never grow weary of our work; let us never grow remiss; let us never yield to sloth. We shall not be able to work for God in heaven, we shall rest in Him there. Now is the time for toil and labor. Now is the time to show love for God by fulfilling His will, which is that we labor in the sweat of our brow in a spirit of penance, though at the same time with a spirit of joy that we are able thus to give gifts to our God, the gift of ourselves and ail our faculties.

Recollect that if the temptation of sloth is given way to, there is an end to sanctity for us. Recollect that if we begin to perform our actions hurriedly, as matters of slight import, we are in a state of delusion, and our final perseverance in the right way is doubtful.

As a tree is known by its fruits, so is the perfection of a soul known by its works; it is the one true criterion. Watch how persons perform their work, and you will know how near they are to God. You will know if Jesus be dwelling as King within them or not.

One who works carelessly, who throws things about untidily, who by thoughtlessness and carelessness creates disorder, that soul is not living in close union with Jesus.

God is so orderly, so perfect, so beautifully neat, if I may say so with reverence, in all His ways. I cannot imagine such a thing as an untidy or a slovenly saint, though, in some, doubtless, the poor body and its tidiness and cleanliness have been disregarded, but this was done from higher motives, and not from carelessness or love of dirt for its own sake.

If we are striving to make a home for Jesus in our hearts, to make His dwelling within us pleasing to Him, how carefully we shall work, how perfectly shall we strive to perform each action, with what a joyous, happy spirit, too.

Not in a dull and slavish way; our service will not be a forced and oppressive, but a very cheerful, happy one; since all our actions will be offered to God, all our acts will be acts of love.

We shall love our life of love and labor, and it is the Mother of fair love who will infuse this love into us, who will help her children to work in the same spirit as she did, who will send angels to assist them if they try to do their part, who will herself teach them the best way of performing their daily duties.

Oh, lovely Mother, Queen of Angels, send thy holy angels to watch over thy children, and make them to live on earth as God’s earthly angels, well pleasing in His sight and most dear to Him.

If Mary’s children, then, would have their hearts in union with their Mother’s Heart, they, too, must love domestic life, home life; they must consider home as their place of work, and love it; they must think that their principal work is to make home happy; they must live in their household as Mary lived in hers; they must put their heart in all they do; they must make all their works acts of love, as Mary did; and God will bless those homes where the spirit of Mary thus lives.

May there be many such homes in this world, that God may love it as in the beginning, when He blessed it and pronounced it good.

“Lord, Help me to be a good wife. I fully realize that I don’t have what it takes to be one without Your help. Take my selfishness, impatience, and irritability and turn them into kindness, long-suffering, and the willingness to bear all things. Take my old emotional habits, mindsets, automatic reactions, rude assumptions, and self-protective stance, and make me patient, kind, good, faithful, gentle, and self-controlled. Take the hardness of my heart and break down the walls with Your battering ram of revelation. Give me a new heart and work in me Your love, peace, and joy. I am not able to rise above who I am at this moment. Only You can transform me.” -The Power of a Praying Wife

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The School Bell is Ringing….Are You Ready?

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organizing, overwhelmed

You’re kidding me, right?? But I’m still waiting for the relaxing days of summer vacation?? And it’s almost over?

That’s my feelings this year. It has been a busy summer and I keep waiting for that one week…just one week where we can just drift through…doing nothing!

Anyway, it is time and that is why I am reposting this article. I really don’t mean to get your feathers ruffled!

Actually I love school days, too. The schedule can be a beautiful thing….it’s all in the attitude. So….Let’s Get Ready!

The School Bell is Ringing….Are You Ready?

With school just around the corner and so many responsibilities and things to accomplish, we may get a little nervous on how we are going to pull it all off.

I know, for me, summer time is so full, my days are bursting, that I truly wonder how I am going to “fit” school back in with all its demands.

I find my life goes in spurts. I am organized for a time, then it slips through my fingers for awhile. I have learned not to get discouraged, trusting that, with grace, I will get it together again. So I know what works for me and I know what doesn’t. Floundering does not work. 🙂 It is always good to have a plan.

The following are a few things that help me along the way not to get too stressed. Maybe a point or two might work for you, too.

1. Make your list. If you are feeling overwhelmed you may think that writing it all down will make you feel more burdened. That’s not how it works. When you can get it down on paper, you can sort and prioritize. Those lowest on the “essential” list can be put on the next day so you can slowly work at getting them all done. If you don’t get it done the next day, continue to add it to the next one. Checking each thing off gives you a sense of accomplishment and energizes you!

2. Keep the house picked up. My corners aren’t always great but if you were to walk into my house at a given time, it would be generally clean….unless we decided to go play volleyball instead of doing the dishes right away (priorities, you know. 🙂 )

3. Go to Bed. 🙂 If I can go to bed and get up at consistent hours, it helps a lot. It’s important for the kids to do the same. Summertime is a season of later bedtimes. We loosen up the night time schedule and relax for a spell. It is quite refreshing….for a time.  I notice how much it affects the next day, these inconsistent and later schedules. That’s okay for a while during the summer but you wouldn’t want to do that during school days. So regularity on getting to bed is important.

4. Wake up at a consistent time, earlier than the family, if you can. With the demands of young children, and the lack of sleep that goes with that, this isn’t always possible. At times like those, we need to just offer it up. That being said, nothing helps me more than getting up before everyone else, getting my prayers said, and doing other duties before the family gets up. It gets me started on the right foot.

5. Plan Your Meals! Okay this one I am not very good at but, Wow! does it take the stress-load off!! I have periods in my life when my girls are taking over the meals so it is hard for me to get back in the swing of things when they are occupied with other life things. But it makes such a huge difference! So if you can get it together once a week to plan those meals, DO SO! It will make a positive impact on your week!

6. Get yourself fully dressed first thing, right down to your shoes. This will help you to get motivated to accomplish things right off in the morning.  I also wash my face with cold water first thing in the morning. I started that 2 years ago when we had the drought. It was a waste of water to leave the tap running until it got warm, so the cold water did the job and now I like the “pick me up” it gives me. Try it! 🙂

So…what kind of things make me feel more organized and on top of things:

!. Number one for me is sticking to my “Spiritual List”, starting with morning prayers and then the other simple spiritual things on that list throughout the day.   If I can check each of those off then I feel like I have accomplished the most important duty and can have the focus and grace to accomplish the other ones that fill up my day.

2. If I haven’t already got an ongoing chore list for the kids (better if it is made the night before) so they know what they should be doing, I make a quick one in the morning for each child. Then everyone knows what they should be doing and you don’t have to have your mind going in all different directions trying to figure out what needs to be done and who needs to do it! The kids are able to tackle their jobs and have the satisfaction of checking it off each time it is accomplished! (Mom….don’t forget to inspect those chores!)

3. Keep the house picked up. (I know, I talked about this already.) Don’t get obsessive about it, especially if you have young children, but periodically through the day get everyone to help with a “pick-me-up”. When you can look at a clean table and a generally clean house, it invigorates and at the same time relaxes you. It’s easier to focus on the next thing to be done.

4. Delegate. Remember, you are the supervisor. Of course, supervisors get their hands dirty, too, but if there is something that you can delegate, do. It helps the children to grow into responsible adults.

5. Don’t listen to negative self-talk. Don’t analyze it, just don’t listen to it. Period. It will bring you down and make you sluggish in accomplishing what you need to get done. Instead, look at your list and do the next thing, say a prayer, grab a book and read it, spend some time with the kids. It’s not worth listening to the rubbish that goes on inside your head.

6. DON’T feel sorry for yourself!! If you have lots to do, thank God for it. He will help you accomplish it….one step at a time. There are many lonely people in this world, many trapped in their addictions, many sad and discouraged because of broken relationships. Learn to thank God for what you DO HAVE and all the wonderful things you GET TO DO each day. Sometimes it just takes an attitude change. He never gives us more than we can bear. Believe it!

7. One last tip….a little self-care goes a long way. When you need a break, grab some coffee and a piece of your Trim Healthy Mama Lemon cake….sit down at the table and  since you don’t want to share it with anyone because of all the expensive ingredients….and they just eat whatever anyway…..put a towel over your head! Surely, they won’t notice?

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“Hospitality is so much more than entertaining-so much more than menus and decorating and putting on a show. To me, it means organizing my life in such a way that there’s always room for one more, always an extra place at the table or an extra pillow and blanket, always a welcome for those who need a listening ear. It means setting aside time for planned camaraderie and setting aside lesser priorities for impromptu gatherings.” -Emilie Barnes. Simple Secrets to a Beautiful Home

Finer Femininity is a small publication compiled to inspire Catholic women in their vocations. It consists of uplifting articles from authors with traditional values, with many of them from priests, written over 50 years ago. These anecdotes are timeless but, with the fast-paced “progress “of today’s world, the pearls within the articles are rarely meditated upon. This little magazine offers Catholic womankind support and inspiration as they travel that oftentimes lonely trail….the narrow road to heaven. The thoughts within the pages will enlighten us to regard the frequently monotonous path of our “daily duties” as the beautiful road to sanctity. Feminine souls need this kind of information to continue to “fight the good fight” in a world that has opposing values and seldom offers any kind of support to these courageous women. Inside the pages you will find inspiration for your roles as single women, as wives and as mothers. In between the thought-provoking articles, the pages are sprinkled with pictures, quotes and maybe even a recipe or two.

Sunshiny Disposition, True Womanhood and The Heart of the Home During Advent and Christmas…..Available here.

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It’s No Use, I’ll Never Get Organized!

Ladies, we thrive when there is order.

We don’t have to be slaves to it, though. And in those years of many children, busy schedules, we need to embrace the fact that orderliness may not be “the order” of the day! That’s OK.

I think we can admit, though, that when we are able to maintain some structure in the running of our homes, everything functions more smoothly.

So…while we are to give of ourselves to the task (or child) at hand, maybe there are some things we can tweak to help us gain more orderliness in-between times. And with a little more order in our lives on the outside, we can experience it more on the inside.

The following is an excerpt from Emilie Barnes’  More Hours in My Day

Do you look around your home, room, or office and want to throw up your hands in disgust and say, “It’s no use. I’ll never get it together!”

We can help! With a few simple tools you can be organized. When I (Sheri) met Emilie, I was hopelessly disorganized. She gave me many tools to use that made my life easier. These concepts can make the difference between a stressless, organized, functioning home and one that is in chaos.

I call them “Commandments for Organization.”

1. Break the big jobs down into manageable tasks. This may be a very difficult thing to do in the beginning for those of you who are “practicing perfectionists.”

This was a tough area for me (Sheri) because I always wanted to do the job perfectly and all at once, but since this isn’t a perfect world, I wasn’t able to do it perfectly. So instead of getting a small task completed, I wouldn’t do anything.

My home was a disaster. This was the rule that changed how I functioned at home, allowing me to go from “total mess to total rest.”

2. Do the worst job first. Once you complete what you consider the most difficult job on your to-do list, everything else will seem much more doable.

Get the worst out of the way, and you’ll be more relaxed as you take on the less overwhelming tasks.

3. Don’t put it down, put it away. This seems too simple, but you will amaze yourself at the time you save by following this rule.

If you tried to figure out how much time you waste picking up and moving the same objects from place to place and room to room, you would understand the magnitude of this simple tenet of organization.

And this is such a great thing to teach your children. Start when they’re young and be diligent and consistent. They will catch on quickly, and your workload will decrease.

4. Invest in a timer. This will be one of the best purchases you ever make. Again this may seem simple, but in the long run you will have more time if you use a timer to keep you on task.

I like to consider myself “spontaneous” when in reality I am just very easily distracted. I start out on a project but very quickly become distracted by something else–a phone call, finding something out of place and stopping to return it, etc., and soon I will completely forget what I was doing in the first place.

A timer keeps me on track. Timers will also help us get more jobs completed because many times we won’t start a project because we assume it will take more time than it actually does.

Working against the timer keeps us on task and motivates us to work quickly. Try it and see what a difference it makes for your home organization.

As you get small tasks completed, you’ll feel a sense of accomplishment, which will encourage you to tackle another project.

This is a great way to make a game out of picking up toys, books, games, or tidying rooms with your children. Set the timer and the first child to complete his or her chore gets a small prize.

Get creative and let the children learn the benefits of a clean and organized room. The old saying “everything has a place and everything is in its place” is a very helpful mind exercise and quickly became one of Emilie’s principles of organization.

Many times the reason we don’t put something away is because it really doesn’t have a “home.” A main reason we end up with too much clutter is because we purchase items but have nowhere to store them.

So let’s get organized!

(You may also like this related post My Rule of Life…)

“Be sweet to him. He’ll always be glad for a little of that. There’s such strength found in sweetness. And something not commonly found in our harsh world today. Be that refreshing, soul-stirring voice in his ear.” – Lisa Jacobson, 100 Ways to Love Your Husband https://amzn.to/2JZwLsY (afflink)

A Housekeeping Schedule you can use, not to stress you out, but to tweak to suit your own needs…

One of our all-time favorite sermons…. “Holy Families Don’t Just Happen”

Blessed Mother “Madonna of Heaven” Apron! Feminine and Beautiful! Fully lined, quality material, made with care! Available here.

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Tidbits to Help You With Your Clutter – Emilie Barnes

Some thoughts today to spur you on to keep ahead of the clutter! 101 Ways to Clean Out the Clutter by Emilie Barnes

The 80/20 Rule

The 80/20 rule is one of the greatest principles you can use to figure out your top priorities. If all of the items on your to-do list are arranged in order of value, 80 percent of the value comes from only 20 percent of the items. The remaining 20 percent of the value comes from 80 percent of the items.

Sometimes a little more and sometimes a little less. The 80/20 rule suggests that in a list of ten projects, finishing two of them will yield 80 percent of the value.

So don’t be overwhelmed by a large list. Remember the top 20 percent of the list gives 80 percent of the value. What’s left undone today can go on the list for tomorrow. Rearrange your to-do list so that it is in order of priority and keep the 80/20 rule in mind.

Accordion Files Fit the Bill

One item that makes great use of space and effort is an accordion file. Go to your local stationery store and purchase one or a few. Accordion files are wonderful and oh, so versatile.

You can use them to store bills for future payment, to keep track of important papers, and to gather greeting and thank-you cards for those special occasions. Set the files up with labels. For example, your bills folder could have pockets labeled “Pay,” “Read,” “Answer,” “Pending,” and “Hold.”

Designate a shelf for a row of accordion files. You’ll be able to store many of your most needed paper items in these. And because accordion files are portable, you can take them with you to meetings so your records are handy or to the kitchen table when it’s time to pay bills.

Don’t forget to purge them occasionally. The files won’t serve you well if they are full of outdated or unneeded items.

Managing the Mail

Now, let’s talk about the mail. The key to managing this area of our lives is doing it daily. If it can’t be done when it arrives, assign a specific time each day to process it.

One area of your home should be designated for this purpose—a desk, table, or a section of the kitchen counter. If you use the kitchen counter, be careful that it doesn’t become a catchall area.

Remember the rule about paper: Don’t put it down, put it away. It only takes a minute to sort the mail when it arrives, even if you can’t process it at that moment.

A simple file system can help you do this. You could use one file for letters you want to read. If you have older children, each might have his or her own folder to check when arriving home from school.

There needs to be a file for bills, another for things you need to discuss with someone in the family, one for mail that needs to be answered, and maybe another for those that require a phone call.

Juggling the Junk Mail

Don’t hesitate when junk mail and unwanted catalogs arrive. Don’t worry about what you might be missing because the same items will be listed again in the next catalog—due to arrive in a couple of weeks.

In fact, if you can get in the habit of instantly tossing junk mail, you’ll get rid of at least 30 to 50 percent of your daily mail.

When your favorite catalogs and magazines arrive, be sure to read them and then put them in the recycle bin or pass them along to a friend.

If you begin receiving too many catalogs and they are not ones that suit your lifestyle, call to cancel them and request that your name be removed from their mailing lists. Some catalogs are available online. You might consider receiving the email version of your favorite store’s publication or an organization’s email newsletter.

Break It Up

To accomplish a big task, break it into a few smaller parts—these become “instant tasks” that you can easily handle. It’s the big items that throw us and leave us in a panic.

Think of one project that you have put off because it seemed too big to take on after a busy day or in the middle of a hectic one.

For example, let’s choose cleaning out the refrigerator as your dreaded project. Can you give it 15 minutes? Even the craziest of days usually have a few breaks in them that could be put to good use.

Set a timer and work like mad for those 15 minutes evaluating leftovers, checking expiration dates, and wiping off shelves.

Tomorrow, set the timer and toss out old vegetables, refresh the ice trays, and rinse the meat and produce bins.

In a day or two you’ll have invested two or three 15-minute sessions and completed the larger task of cleaning your refrigerator.

 

“We must have a daily habit of prayer; it should be ingrained in us. Morning and Night Prayers, the Rosary and frequent lifting of the mind to God will help us to hear His Voice.The daily habit of prayer leads us to spiritual health. We are more “tuned in” to know what God’s will is in our life, to desire it and to do it. By our habit of prayer we will experience the tranquility and happiness that comes from Him Who sees our efforts and loves us so much! He will give us the peace that passeth all understanding….” – Anne Joachim

Download the Finer Femininity App on your smart phone! Available on both Androids and Iphones! A neat perk about the App is that even if you are not on Facebook you can still look at the beautiful quotes and pictures that are updated several times a day on the FB icon….filling your heart with inspiration and encouragement!

 

“I’ve long been wanting a book on various virtues to help my children become better Catholics. But most books focused on the virtues make being bad seem funny or attractive in order to teach the child a lesson. I’ve always found them to be detrimental to the younger ones who’s logic hasn’t formed. This book does an awesome job in showing a GOOD example in each of the children with all the various struggles children commonly struggle with (lying, hiding things, being grumpy, you name it.) But this book isn’t JUST virtue training… it’s also just sweet little chats about our love for God, God’s greatness, etc…
And the best thing of all? They are SHORT! I have lots of books that are wonderful, but to be honest I rarely pick them up because I just don’t have the time to read a huge, long story. These are super short, just one page, and very to the point. The second page has a poem, picture, a short prayer and a few questions for the kids to get them thinking. It works really, really well right before our bedtime prayers and only takes a few minutes at most.
If you like “Leading the Little ones to Mary” then you will like these… they are a little more focused on ALL age groups, not just little ones… so are perfect for a family activity even through the teenage years, down to your toddler.” https://www.etsy.com/listing/246688723/cheerful-chats-for-catholic-children?ref=shop_home_active_7

 

 
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Organization: Today is the Day! – Emilie Barnes

Organize your day with tips from Emilie Barnes and her book 101 Ways to Clean Out the Clutter !

Prevent Interruptions

Most people are interrupted at least once every five minutes. If this is true for you, analyze what’s causing those interruptions.

You and your situation are unique—the things that disrupt your day are different than the things that disrupt another’s day. If you haven’t studied this loss of time, become aware of it. You will be amazed at how much time is whittled away by these interruptions and disturbances.

Consider how to safeguard your time. There’s nothing wrong with telling people you can see them at 9:30, 12:15, or 6:40 exactly. Even family members can be taught not to interrupt.

Maybe you cause the interruptions by insisting on checking email every few minutes or answering your cell phone even when you are in the middle of something. If you don’t respect your time, others certainly won’t know how to respect your time.

The Family Communication Center

Hang a bulletin board, pegboard, racks, or other wall-mounted storage where it can be seen by all members of your family. This will become your home “communication center.” Messages can be sent, messages can be received, and messages can be displayed here.

Other helpful supplies to keep in this area include a dry erase board, a calendar, a list of important phone numbers, and a key holder. Encourage your family to use this area by leaving special notes or treats for them to pick up every now and then. This center is really helpful to have in place when babysitters and houseguests are over. Be sure to write a nice greeting on the white board for your guests, or pin a greeting card and their guest keys to the bulletin board.

Purge the Paper Piles

Get rid of extra paper. Almost 90 percent of all paper in your home and office is never referred to again. That’s a staggering amount of paper!

Choose a room, any room, and there is probably a pile of paper stashed in a drawer, cupboard, or even loose on furniture surfaces.

In the kitchen you might have recipes, cooking articles, and grocery lists piling up. In your office school papers, bills, and receipts gather. Your bedroom ends up being a place for scraps of reminder notes and magazines to accumulate.

Pick a room and go straight for the papers. Allow yourself to keep only a few pieces, maybe five, and toss the rest.

Yes, you can keep more if they are important. However, if it’s a piece you haven’t referred to in a while, won’t need anymore or mean to read but never will…it goes.

Toss at least ten times the amount of stuff you keep. Your rooms will look and feel so much better—and so will you.

Today Is the Day!

Resolve to make each and every day count. Instead of constantly anticipating tomorrow, live for today.

When you invest in tomorrow’s worries or schedule, you’re missing out on what is supposed to happen or be experienced today!

Have you ever spent a great deal of time fretting over a future obligation or task only to find that it was not that burdensome—but the weeks of worrying were?

Make today count toward your pursuit of a more organized life. Select one item and find an ideal place for it. Now, when that item ends up on the coffee table or on the kitchen counter, you’ll know exactly where it belongs. Your quest to de-clutter your home can truly be this simple.

“A true wife makes a man’s life nobler, stronger, grander, by the omnipotence of her love ‘turning all the forces of manhood upward and heavenward.’ While she clings to him in holy confidence and loving dependence she brings out in him whatever is nobles and richest in his being. She inspires him with her courage and earnestness. She beautifies his life. She softens whatever is rude and harsh in his habits or his spirit. She clothes him with the gentler graces of refined and cultured manhood. While she yields to him and never disregards his lightest wish, she is really his queen, ruling his whole life and leading him onward and upward in every proper path.” J.R.Miller

Finer Femininity Book Recommendations

If you purchase items through my affiliate links, I receive a small commission but your price doesn’t change. Thank you for your support.

Outlaws of Ravenhurst

Do you want a gripping Catholic novel for your youth? Outlaws of Ravenhurst is it! “The Outlaws of Ravenhurst has been a popular children’s classic for almost a century. Filled with sword fights, secret passages, and mysterious strangers, this tale of adventure and intrigue portrays lives of courageous virtue amid trials and dangers. The bold spirit, selfless charity, and heroic sacrifice of The Outlaws of Ravenhurst are sure to stir in the hearts of Catholic readers, both young and old, a deep love for their faith and a passion to defend it.” (afflink)

Come Rack, Come Rope

“Come Rack, Come Rope is one of Robert Hugh Benson’s best-known novels. Based on true events and individuals in the time of the Elizabethan persecution of Catholics in England, Come Rack, Come Rope centers on Robin and Margaret, who give up their love for another and hope of marriage in order to minister to their persecuted neighbors. Masterfully weaving the historical source material with his own creative additions, Benson presents an unflinchingly truthful portrayal of the terror of those times along with an achingly beautiful depiction of true faith.”

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My Rule of Life

Before I begin this little excerpt about my own Rule of Life, I would like to say that I have one maxim I go by, reminding myself of it often. It is: “People are more important than things…and schedules, and accomplishments, etc.”

That being said, my thoughts on a Rule of Life:

I never heard of this term before until I picked up the book A Mother’s Rule of Life several years ago. I lived it, to a certain extent, but didn’t know what it was called.
One thing I so appreciated from that book was the part on the Spiritual Life…she talked about tithing your time to God.
She suggested a certain amount of time, 10% of your waking hours, that you dedicate to God …which I thought was pretty neat. It gave me something to go by and some kind of a goal.
It was then that I began to “journal” or write down my list on the spiritual things I wanted to accomplish throughout each day. And I would check them off as I went along. I was hung up on the numbers for awhile (making sure I got my “tithing” in) and then eventually that part fell by the wayside.
This began a habit in me that I have practiced for many years now…the writing down of what I wanted to accomplish spiritually each day. And this list-making reached out into other aspects of my life.
I firmly believe the spiritual duties we do each day are the foundation of any Rule of Life. It is at the top of my page each day in my Journal.

Here’s what mine looks like:
Morning Prayers (private)
Daily Mass, if possible (with children)
Mercy Chaplet (with children)
Family Rosary (with family)
Night Prayers (private)

In order to accomplish our spiritual things and the other things we need to do each day, we need to take care of our body.
How will we say our 15 minutes of Morning Prayer (if that’s what we have committed to) if we don’t get to sleep at a decent hour? It is valuable to put a time for rising on our list and sticking to it as much as we can. This will be difficult if the time for going to bed is ignored.
In the evening, there may be extenuating circumstances in raising a family…but we have to admit, a lot of the time we bring our fatigue on ourselves (talking to myself here). We lollygag at night, putting off going to bed for whatever reason and then, guess what?? We are too tired the next morning to get up and start the day right, with the first thing on our list….Morning Prayers. And then it goes downhill from there….Blah. So, remember, your accomplishments during the day and how well the day turns out begin the evening before!

This is what my “bodily” or “health” section looks like. It’s simple and doable:
Exercise (T-Tapp, a walk, tread milling, etc.)
Take supplements
Water (half a person’s body weight in ounces)

(You can add what time to bed, what time for rising and anything else that is important to you in this category)
Check them off as you do them!

Next is your household duties. The important stuff…and write it down. Mine probably looks different than yours does because I have girls who take over some of the big things. Here’s an example of what yours can begin with:

1.Meals
2. School
3.Laundry
(Add to this section of your list as you see fit but just the important things…the MUST-DO’S.)

Keep things picked up in between time…maybe plan a 20 minute hoopla with the kids as everyone takes a room. This could be done more than once a day…and added to your list.

And then, added to the bottom of your list….one big thing, like clean fridge. ….but only for 15 minutes!

And do it for 15 minutes each day until it is done! Set the timer. Oftentimes we can’t make it through a whole big job…and we tend to avoid it if it is big. So…break it up into doable slots of time. I am always amazed at how much I get done in 15 minutes and how quickly these big jobs get accomplished. A great feeling, indeed!

I think this is valuable…..Zig Ziglar (who is a big guru in the positive motivational field) said to plan into your schedule time with your family. Yes, I know as busy mothers, we are always with our family, working hard for them each day, rubbing shoulders with them, etc. But maybe we could write down…20 minutes with kids…and spend that time building Lego, reading a story, telling a story, crafting or whatever. Those are the kind of things that, built into your rule of life, you will never regret.
Write.it.down.

So a recap of your categories on your list:
Spiritual Duties
Bodily Health
Most Necessary Housework Things we Can’t NOT Do (always excepting extenuating circumstances)
One Big Thing (for 15 minutes)
Time With Family                                                                                                  Other things you’d like to accomplish                                            

Just a mention…try to get in a little breather for yourself each day, whether it is doing a bit of crocheting or looking up a special website online. It’s important we recharge, too!

All the other little things you have to accomplish each day can revolve around this list. This is your go-to, your foundation. It won’t be perfect. That’s ok. And you can write the little things down, too. It’s great when we can check things off! And if you don’t get them done that day, put them on the next day and try again!

An Example List:

This may not be detailed enough for you. Here is the link to Holly Pierlot’s A Mother’s Rule of Life. It has been years since I read it, my daughter-in-law is reading it and loving it!

A quote from My Prayer Book, Father Lasance:
“One of the means,” says a spiritual writer, “of acquiring and perfecting in us the interior life, which raises a man above the merely terrestrial and animal life to the height of the divine life in Jesus Christ consists in adopting and following a rule of life, which does not leave the employment of our time to caprice, but assigns to each moment its own proper duty”
“Let all things be done decently and according to order.” says St. Paul. (1Cor. xiv. 40)
“Where there is no rule there is no order,” says Father Hamon. “We live by caprice and fancies. With a rule of life, on the contrary, all is done in an orderly manner; each duty has its proper time set apart for it; nothing is forgotten; nothing is done in haste or in a careless manner.
Thanks to a rule of life, all is done well; and that which is true in regard to order is equally so in regard to practices of piety.
With a rule of life they are done with exactitude; without a rule they have no fixed hour; we defer them, then we again defer them, and we finish by omitting them entirely.”

Creating a home filled with order and cleanliness (as much as is possible in your state of life and in your unique circumstances 😊)communicates a heart that is ordered and pure. Take a moment today to make your home more simply organized and see how the sweet savor blesses those around you. -Emilie Barnes, Keep It Simple for Busy Women http://amzn.to/2y2JoN3

These are three audios for my podcast that I am publishing here. I also have these available on youtube. I will let you know when the Podcast is up and running on Itunes. You can subscribe to my Youtube channel here.

Catholic Family Life:

Family Life, The Stripping of Self-Love

Mediation for Lent: Veronica Wipes the Face of Jesus

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