St. Margaret, Queen of Scotland – True and Noble Woman

How Saint Margaret, Queen of Scotland, made her home lovely and her kingdom a paradise – how every true woman can imitate Margaret, and make her little home-kingdom sweet and attractive.

From True Womanhood, Rev. Bernard O’Reilly, 1893

Malcolm (IV.), King of Scotland . . . shone like a star in the heavens; for, being prevented [supplied beforehand] by God in the benediction of sweetness from his tender years, he had a fervent love for God, and was of such pure conscience and gentleness of manners, that when amongst persons of the world he seemed like a monk, and, indeed, an earthly angel.

This Malcolm was the grandson of St. David, and the great-grandson of St. Margaret, the blessed scion of a line of heroic kings. Let us see how the gentle Margaret transformed, by the irresistible ascendancy of her womanly virtues, her rude, worldly-minded, and warlike husband into a saint, and all Scotland into a school of gentleness and piety. Her example will teach most eloquently how every true-hearted woman can make all hearts yield to the influence of her goodness, and her own life be like a reservoir of living waters in a thirsty land for many a generation after her day.

Margaret, born in exile, reared in Buda in Hungary beneath the eyes of its apostolic king, St. Stephen (997-1038), returned to England in her early girlhood only to become an orphan, and to have to fly for dear life with her sister and brother across the seas.

A storm providentially cast them on the shore of Scotland, where they found a refuge in the court of Malcolm III., or Malcolm Canmore (Greathead). Malcolm had himself tasted the bitterness of exile, having seven years before been obliged to fly to England after the murder of his father by Macbeth.

St. Edward the Confessor, Margaret’s grand-uncle, had warmly befriended the fugitive and enabled him to recover his own. So the generous Malcolm was but too happy to repay to the helpless descendants of Alfred the Great the debt of gratitude thus contracted.

Margaret was then in her twenty-fourth year, and had been during their long orphanhood a second mother to her sister, Christina, and her brother, the chivalrous Edgar Atheling. Her wonderful beauty and her angelic modesty, much more than her royal birth and the accomplishments due to the careful education she had received, drew on her the admiration of the untutored Scottish nobles and their warlike king. He was attracted by the manifold graces of the royal maiden; for hers were the supernatural virtues which he had learned to worship in Edward the Confessor, and which shone with a softened and gentler charm in the lovely exile.

She became, a few months after her arrival in the court of Dunfermline, its mistress and the queen of all Scotland, to the unbounded delight of every class in the community.

It was a rude age, in a country which a long series of invasions by the Northmen, frequent wars with England, and perpetual feuds between the native clans, had kept half-uncivilized in spite of its Christianity.

Providence had reserved for a woman, for this young queen, whose soul had been so chastened and tempered by a whole life of trial, to complete the work begun by St. Columba and his brethren five centuries before that.

Let a woman’s hand trace the first outlines of the glorious picture of piety, charity, and patriotism offered in this queenly life of twenty-three years on the throne.

“Margaret was a true daughter of Alfred, and the traditions of the Alfred of Hungary (St. Stephen) were fresh upon her, and, instead of sitting down to cower alarmed amid the turmoils round her, she set herself to conquer the evils in her own feminine way, by the performance of her queenly duties.

She was happy in her husband: Malcolm revered her saintly purity even more than he loved her sweet, sunny, cheerful manner, or admired her surpassing loveliness of person. “He looked on her as something too precious and tender for his wild, rugged court, and attended to her slightest bidding with reverence, kissing her holy books, which he could not read, and interpreting her Saxon-spoken advice to his rude Celts.”

She even made him help her to wash the feet of the poor, and aid her in disgusting offices to the diseased, and his royal treasury was open to her to take all that she desired for alms.

Sometimes she would pretend to take it by stealth, and Malcolm would catch her by her wrists and carry her to her confessor to ask if she was not a little thief who deserved to be well punished. In his turn he would steal away her books, and bring them back after a time gilt and adorned with beautiful illuminations.

We have not, in order to form an estimate of the incredible amount of good done by this extraordinary woman, to depend upon legends or disjointed historical fragments. Her confessor himself, a monk of Durham called Theodoric or Thierry, composed a history of this most admirable and most imitable life.

The Scottish chieftains who were least inclined to reform their lives or refine their manners in emulation of Malcolm Canmore, could not resist the influence which drew them to Dunfermline, were it only to enjoy the privilege of looking upon a beauty which appeared to them unearthly, of being addressed by their royal mistress with a grace that borrowed more of its charm from piety than from courtesy, and of bearing with them to their homes some trifling present, which borrowed infinite value in their eyes from the angelic goodness of the giver.” – Charlotte Mary Yonge, “Cameos from English History,” vol. i., p. 98.

She effected in the thoughts, the sentiments, the manners, and the morals of these hitherto untamed and unruly nobles, not a little of the same change which had taken place in the mind and heart and conduct of the king; and thus the blessed influence of her virtue and gentleness spread from above downward, through every class, till the lowliest peasants and the remotest Highland glens were made to feel the refining and elevating effects of Margaret’s rule and motherly solicitude.

The court of Malcolm—from the boisterous meeting-place of turbulent and intemperate warriors that it had been for centuries—became the image of the court of Buda, where St. Stephen made Grecian culture and Magyar magnificence to reign side by side, blended and sanctified by the cross.

Not one of them (her nobles) ventured to use a profane word or make an unseemly jest before her. They had a rude, ungodly practice of starting away from table without waiting for grace, and this the gentle queen reformed by sending, as an especial gift from herself, a cup of wine to all who remained.

In after times, the last cup was called, after her, St. Margaret’s cup, or the grace-cup.

To improve the manners of the ladies, she gathered round her a number of young girls, whom she brought up under her own eye, and she used to sit in the midst of them, embroidering rich vestments for the service of the Church, and permitting cheerful talk with the nobles whom she admitted, all men of whose character she had a good opinion.

From these young ladies she exacted that their homes should, in turn, become so many centers of zeal for the good of others; and thus every home in Scotland was benefited by the examples and teachings of the queen.

But above all her other qualities shone her tender love for the poor and the sick. She founded hospitals and asylums for them; and among her nobles, her most especial friends and favorites were such as distinguished themselves by their active charities.

Fully aware that true religion is the parent and nurse of that great chief virtue, she bent herself, from the first year of her reign, to the task of making it flourish wherever the misfortunes of the times had caused it to languish, and to plant it by serious missionary labors wherever the missionaries had not penetrated or had only had an imperfect success.

She caused councils to be convened, encouraged the bishops and abbots to enact the most salutary decrees, supporting them with the whole force of the royal authority; obtained the erection of new episcopal sees, did away with every abuse condemned by the Supreme Pontiff, insisted on cordial and unqualified submission to his teaching; repaired churches and monasteries in decay, and built new ones in every place where they were most needed or promised to be most useful, and, above all, spared no effort and no expense to give to Scotland a thoroughly educated, exemplary, and devoted clergy.

While thus proving herself to be a true mother to her adopted people, she was not unmindful of her English origin or of the sufferings and needs of her countrymen. The wars between the two kingdoms which she was powerless to prevent, left many English captives in Scottish prisons. But her generosity and her influence found means to alleviate their condition and to hasten their ransom.

She founded a hospital for sick and infirm prisoners, where they were tenderly cared for till they obtained their freedom; and for this purpose, she spared not her own purse, nor warm appeals to the generosity of the Scottish captors and the affection of the prisoners’ English relatives.

Thus the veneration and love felt for Margaret in Scotland spread beyond its borders to every part of England; and from the nearest counties emigrants flocked across the boundary to settle in the Lowlands, and enjoy there the security and other manifold blessings bestowed on their subjects by Malcolm Canmore and his angelic queen.

There are other inestimable benefits for which Scotland has always acknowledged herself indebted to St. Margaret: the foundation of her great schools of learning, the establishment of a large and flourishing commerce with continental Europe, the encouragement of the liberal and the industrial arts, and the enactment of wise and enlightened laws protecting the liberties and fostering the best interests of the people.

Of the nine children with whom her union was blessed, one, Ethelred, died in infancy, the eldest, Edward, was slain with his father before Alnwick Castle in 1093; of the others, three sons, Edmund, Edgar, and David, reigned successively on the throne of Scotland, continuing the Golden Age inaugurated by their parents: of her two daughters, Matilda or Maud became the wife of Henry I of England, and was her mother’s living image, and Edith was married to Eustace, Count of Boulogne, becoming in her turn the mother of her people.

Surely it was a beautiful life, this of the tempest-tossed royal child, born in exile far away from the land of her fathers, and then cast by the storm on the Scottish coast, like a treasure beyond all price to be cherished by king and people, and to live in the hearts of all succeeding generations.

With the mirror of this most admirable life before us, let us contemplate how every woman can in like manner make of her home a paradise, and be the loved and worshiped queen of the little kingdom which no one can take from her.

“You must have the courage and farsightedness to face all of your problems and must ask help from Him who is the source of all wisdom in the greatest and most worthy career a woman can espouse: being a real mother. The greatest joy you can find is in one day discovering that your daughters are as good as they are beautiful and your sons as pure as they are stalwart.”
Fr. Lawrence G. Lovasik. The Catholic Family Handbook

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The saints assure us that simplicity is the virtue most likely to draw us closer to God and make us more like Him.

No wonder Jesus praised the little children and the pure of heart! In them, He recognized the goodness that arises from an untroubled simplicity of life, a simplicity which in the saints is completely focused on its true center, God.

That’s easy to know, simple to say, but hard to achieve.

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Concentrated Attention – Fr. Narciso Irala, S.J.

A little psychology today….

Fr. Irala, S.J. was a Jesuit and a Catholic psychologist at a time when, in general, they could be trusted. In this article he talks about the importance of concentrated attention to achieve goals…temporal and spiritual. It is from the book “Mental Efficiency Without Fatigue” by Fr. Narciso Irala, S.J.

Painting by Gregory Frank Harris

CONCENTRATED ATTENTION

Our attention is concentrated when we pursue a single idea to the exclusion of others, or when the lamp of our intellect is focused on one object or on a small group of objects.

Concentration, therefore, is the reaction of our whole being to an attracting event or treasure; it is the habit of paying attention without effort; it is the following of a straight road that leads to our destination without our being led astray by attractions on the bypaths. We arrive more promptly and almost without weariness.

In like manner, he who studies a book, performs manual work or plans a business deal and becomes totally absorbed in it, forgetting himself and everything else, will obtain surprising results without lasting fatigue. Concentration brings efficiency and joy which results in maximum efficiency.

Lack of concentration brings fatigue and disgust which results in minimum efficiency.

The wear of one or more hours of perfect concentration without hurry or anxiety can be repaired by relaxing the brow and the eyes for a few minutes, by receiving conscious sensations, by performing physical exercises, etc.

One day of well-ordered mental work of this type can be amply compensated by a night of peaceful slumber. In this manner it is possible to continue for months and years with no danger of exhaustion. Since we are following nature’s own wise laws, we shall strengthen rather than destroy our mental equipment.

Nor should we think that this continued labor will result in boredom; the opposite is, in fact, true. For the unity of the concentrated mind and the resultant intellectual enrichment are sources of real satisfaction.

“Joy,” says Aristotle, “accompanies every perfect act.” The root of Napoleon’s human greatness was probably his power of concentration. When he studied a problem, he became so absorbed in it that it seemed he had nothing else to do. Having solved one problem, having made one decision, Napoleon went on to study another.

He used to say: “When I want to sleep, I close every drawer and I sleep. When I want to interrupt an affair, I close its drawer and open another one.” In this way, Napoleon managed to do mental work for sixteen hours a day. He was extraordinarily efficient because the unity of his mind gave strength and constancy to his decisions.

This power of concentrating our attention on what we study or undertake is the main, though not the only, element influencing mental ability and human greatness.

Concentration: Root of Human Greatness

The better our concentration, the greater our achievement. This truth holds a most encouraging prospect for us.

I once knew a student who possessed a remarkable gift of concentration. He was “made” for mathematics, so much so that he would begin his studies right after breakfast. Hour after hour he remained oblivious of himself and of all sound or movement around him. So absorbed was he in that deep and delightful concentration that he heard nothing, not even the bells.

When he completed studies at the University of Madrid, he emerged as the most gifted student ever to have passed through those halls. That extraordinary distinction was largely the result of his remarkable powers of concentration.

Improving the Powers of Concentration

Once concentration is appreciated as the main factor in efficiency and happiness, whatever means are suggested in the course of these pages should help to increase this power.

1. a) by removing causes of distraction and obsession;
2. b) arousing our interest and enthusiasm
3. c) making use of efficacious acts of the will;
4. d) improving the functioning of the human organism—its nerves, muscles, blood, respiration.

Stages in the Pattern of Concentration

Concentration does not develop suddenly. It is usually preceded by an initial period of ‘adjustment’ in which nerves and muscles, perhaps previously overstimulated, gradually adapt themselves to the new task, while the mind, setting aside other thoughts, penetrates ever more deeply into the present object of its attention. This is quickly executed by normal persons.

Melancholic and maniacal individuals require a longer time to delve into a new concentration. This may be because former ideas or images tend to persevere longer in them than in normal persons.

There follows a second period of `warm-up’ as a temporary state of readiness induced by activity and followed by the depth of the attention in which, after the first inertia has been overcome and the nerves and muscles have been adapted to the task, the mind really enters into the matter and becomes absorbed in it.

This abstraction from all other things and this profound consideration of the present subject may reach different degrees, and in proportion to these will be our efficiency and our joy.

Many people become deeply interested and are able to concentrate smoothly for one, two, or more hours with a single act of their will. In many others, however, attention is spasmodic or explosive, sustained by repeated impulses—perhaps because their interest does not thoroughly overcome inertia or because the will of a perfectionist is imposing an exaggerated goal.

On the other hand, children as well as inconstant, weak and sick persons do not possess such prolonged attention. They need frequently to renew their interest or acts of will.

Later on we shall explain how even normal persons should interrupt their concentration every one or two hours or more frequently if they develop any tension. Thus fatigue is avoided or at least postponed.

In the third period (saturation) attention weakens, concentration requires a greater effort, and weariness or boredom begins to emerge. It is at this moment that an interruption or a change of the object of concentration is necessary.

Unless this is done, the fourth period (fatigue) will quickly set in. During this period efficiency gradually lessens and weariness increases, together with a lack of interest, inhibition; and the annoyance caused by effort.

Practice for Improved Concentration

1. Always have a motive, a concrete, feasible goal for your work. For instance: ‘I want to enrich myself with, or to discuss the ideas of, this chapter.’ Such a desire is excellent to enforce concentration if it can be realized in one or a few hours. It will lose its efficiency, however, if you have to read for hours or days, unless that desire is reinforced through repetition.

So, make it easier by tackling one chapter or paragraph at a time. Say, “I want to discover and learn every useful thought of this chapter.” With this concrete and realizable goal, your willing will be efficient, and attention will follow.

That is what we do when, while reading a book or article, we underline any interesting information or when we make resumes of helpful paragraphs.

2. Begin courageously, even though you experience neither pleasure nor progress. Concentration will follow as spontaneously as does sleep, and without your being conscious of it or having to make an effort. Just start under favorable circumstances. Music or moderate sounds, chewing or whistling help some persons, but not all.

3. Resist the curiosity of knowing what is taking place around you.

4. Arouse interest and enthusiasm for what you are doing.

5. If either weakness or fatigue makes it difficult for you to concentrate on a full page of reading or on a short lecture, try without strain to be truly attentive for shorter periods several times a day.

During these attempts, the single objective should be, positively to follow calmly the development of the idea rather than, negatively, to avoid distraction. If distractions do occur, make an effort to return once more to the subject matter.

Normal concentration may quickly be achieved by paying strict attention to half a page of reading or by paying attention several times during, say, a ten-minute period, then gradually increasing the length of the period of attention.

6. Do not drink alcoholic beverages to stimulate your attention or your organism. In spite of the widespread opposite opinion, alcohol is a depressant, not a stimulant. In the beginning, it is true, you may feel self-confidence and optimism about your own performance. This happens because alcohol reaches the highest centers first, and so you think your mental work is better than it is. But the delaying effects are mental depression and emotional irritability.

7. Coffee and tea are stimulating and safe for those who need a “lift.” Their effect does not come immediately and it may last for a few hours. However, sleep may be disturbed as a result of large doses, the pulse accelerated, muscular steadiness decreased, and tremor may set in.

Concentration in Prayer

In study or natural mental work, the measure of our intellectual happiness is established by two factors: our interest in the object or truth discovered; the clarity with which we see it.

In prayer or in other supernatural mental work, these two factors attain unlimited proportions. The object studied is God who is total Truth and Beauty, and the light of Infinite Wisdom is added to the smaller lamp of human understanding.

If we cannot attain true efficiency and satisfaction in study, reading, or thinking without full concentration, much less shall we be able to step forward and enjoy the unsuspected delights of conversing with God unless we give him our full attention.

The life of God within us often implies sudden shafts of supernatural light, waves of superhuman satisfaction, anticipation of heaven, touches of divinity. These are the inspirations which suddenly illuminate undreamed-of horizons and treasures with almost intuitive evidence.

These are the affections and consolations often experienced by saints and by people of good will when they make a retreat or truly recollect themselves in prayer —consolations surpassing all earthly joys, impossible to be understood by those who have not experienced them. These are also motives clearly perceived in prayer which attract the will and facilitate what is difficult.

In an effort to make this clear and simple we may use this formula:

Attentive prayer=Root of Sanctity

Or, using RC to represent “Result of concentration into the divine,” we may say, RC

Efficiency+joy=Limitless

Fatigue+distaste=Nil

The soul that is not sufficiently recollected remains unaware of these divine sparks and consolations; rather, God refrains from giving them when he foresees that, because of the soul’s dissipation, they will be neither noticed nor appreciated.

If only we could enter with our whole being into conversation with God! If only we were fully attentive to what we say to Him in a brief vocal prayer!

If we would only listen to what God wishes to say to us in the intimacy of our prayer! God speaks, as a rule, only in the most intimate part of our being; we shall hear Him only through perfect concentration.

PRACTICAL RECAPITULATION

Aids to Concentration

Appreciate concentration as root of human greatness.

Remove obstacles, such as noises, conversation, etc.

Arouse interest and enthusiasm.

Desire concentration, convinced that it is possible.

Undertake concentration in a secluded place.

Begin each chapter or paragraph with solid motivation.

Make use of the period of ‘enthusiasm’ or ‘depth.’

Interrupt in the period of ‘pre-fatigue.’

Overcome distractions and compulsions

And St. Francis De Sales says: “The measure of Divine Providence acting on us is the degree of confidence that we have in it.” This is where the problem lies. Many do not believe in Providence because they’ve never experienced it, but they’ve never experienced it because they’ve never jumped into the void and taken the leap of faith. They never give it the possibility to intervene. They calculate everything, anticipate everything, they seek to resolve everything by counting on themselves, instead of counting on God. -Fr. Jacques Philippe, Searching For and Maintaining Peace http://amzn.to/2u1NCTd (afflink)

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Ordinary Saints

From An Easy Way to Become a Saint by Father Paul O’Sullivan, 1949

SAINT THERESE OF LISIEUX

We have a striking example in our own days of a canonized saint who was actually given to us as an example of how to become holy, by what she herself tells us is the easy, the “little way” to Heaven.

St. Therese of Lisieux never worked a miracle, never enjoyed heavenly visions, never did anything extraordinary, but she did well all that she did.

She tells us that she went to Heaven in an elevator (a lift).

In the Carmelite convent in which she lived, none of the sisters remarked anything wonderful in her conduct. She was sweet and joyful and was the sunshine of the community. Possibly some of the other sisters prayed longer and did more rigorous penances than she did.

An incident which took place before her death shows how simple and unpretentious was her life.

It was the custom in the convent for the prioress to write a short account of the life of each sister after that sister’s death.

During the illness of St. Therese, two sisters were heard speaking of this. One said to the other, “Poor Mother Prioress, whatever will she find to write about poor little Sister Therese?”

Yet this dear little saint began to work so many wonders after her death and obtain so many favors for those who had recourse to her that the whole world rang with her praises. She was solemnly canonized after a remarkably short time.

What a consolation she offers to those who wish to be holy! Hers was the little, the easy way, the elevator (lift) by which we, too, no matter how weak we are, can go to Heaven.

BENIGNA CONSOLATA

A second example that will encourage the humblest of us is the story of Benigna Consolata.

Her life, her conduct were so ordinary that those who were most intimate with her had not the faintest idea that she was a saint. She did not spend her nights in prayer, nor did she fast more rigorously than the others; she never worked miracles, yet her pure, humble life attracted the love of Our Lord, who frequently appeared to her and treated her with the most loving intimacy.

When speaking to her, He addressed her by her pet name, “Nina Mia.”

Her name was Benigna Philomena Consolata. He revealed to her the most consoling doctrines and said to her, “My dear little Secretary, write all I tell you, that others may know it.”

The sisters who lived with her were utterly surprised when they learned after her death of her wonderful sanctity.

We ourselves may be surprised when we enter Heaven to see on high thrones those whom we knew on Earth but whose sanctity we did not suspect.

THE CHILDREN OF FATIMA

What happened more recently at Our Lady’s sanctuary in Fatima will serve as another lesson on how to reach great holiness by simple means.

The Angel Guardian of Portugal came to prepare the three chosen children who were later on destined to see Our Blessed Lady.

Three things the Angel bade them do, viz., to pray devoutly, to hate sin and to offer to God with patience the sufferings the Almighty would be pleased to send them, this for His greater glory and for the salvation of souls.

God’s Holy Mother herself, when she came, taught them the same lessons, which enabled these poor ignorant little children to become worthy of their glorious mission.

Can we not do what three poor, unlettered children did?

We ourselves from time to time meet with simple souls whose extraordinary virtue is made evident by a single act.

A dear old woman run over by a carriage in Dublin and horribly crushed was rushed to a hospital. One of the Mercy Nuns who became her nurse tried with infinite delicacy to comfort and console her. What was not the nun’s surprise when the patient opened her eyes and said, “Sister dear, are you telling me to be resigned to God’s holy will? Let me tell you that God’s holy will has been always to me as welcome as the fruit to the tree.”

Poor, with many sorrows and needs during her long life, she now, in the throes of agony, manifested her perfect union with the will of God.

Monsignor Robert Hugh Benson, the convert son of the Protestant Archbishop of Canterbury, while still a priest, went for a short visit to Catholic Ireland, of which he had heard so much.

At his request, a friend took him to visit some of the poor sick in their little homes. He saw what he called “wonders.”

These dear sufferers amazed the young convert by their faith, patience and perfect resignation to the will of God.

One old man was suffering from an awful cancer, already in an advanced stage, which was eating away his breast. Father Benson, full of compassion, tried to say some words of comfort to him.

“Oh my, Father, it’s nothing,” replied the old man. “Sure in a few days I will be with God in Heaven. Didn’t He suffer much more for me?”

On his return to England, Father Benson wrote a touching article on the heroic patience and faith of these poor people. “They seem to see God,” he said.

Owing to political troubles, an unfortunate man slew his enemy, a crown official. Denounced by a perfidious friend of his own, he was arrested and condemned to death. He repented sincerely of his crime, but could not pardon his base accuser.

The chaplain of the prison used his utmost efforts to induce him to go to Confession. “This I cannot do,” he said, “because, though sorry for my crime, I cannot pardon my false friend. Thus my Confession would be bad.”

A good Sister of Mercy won his heart by her “infinite” kindness and delicacy. She too tried to induce him to confess.  In vain.

On the eve of his execution, she made a last, supreme effort. “Do you know who I am?” she asked him.

“Yes, Sister, you are an Angel from Heaven.”

“No, I am no Angel from Heaven, but I am the sister of the man whom you killed. I have pardoned you, I have fasted and prayed and done all I could to save your soul.”

Amazed, the poor man fell on his knees and, in a flood of tears, kissed her feet. “Yes, yes, Angel of God, for you are, indeed, an Angel. I forgive with all my heart my enemy, oh forgive me you.”

Hers, indeed, was heroic forgiveness. A single act, as we have said, reveals at times heroic sanctity.

The widow’s alms won Our Lord’s high approbation. “She has given more,” He said, “than all the rest.” She had given only a mite, but she gave it with all her heart.

The Good Thief’s plea for mercy on the cross obtained plenary pardon for all his crimes. The Publican’s short prayer: “O God, have mercy on me, a sinner” made his soul as white as snow.

We, as parents, press on each day, with our children’s best interests at heart, asking God to fill the gaps. Each day is an opportunity to spend time with them, to sacrifice, to touch their hearts and thereby be fulfilled ourselves. Our Lady of Good Success, Pray for Us!

Sermon!

Excellent sermon! Truth is truth….too many Catholics are looking for loopholes. “Are you saved from eternal death by your conscience or by Jesus Christ? The primacy of conscience is the New Jansenism….”

Light and Peace by Quadrupani

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This is an awesome little book!! It really could be a handbook on life for Catholics.

The chapters are short but power packed with balanced wisdom and advice on such subjects like confession, sadness, zeal, prayer, temptations, interior peace, liberty of spirit and many others.

Many of the excerpts are from St. Francis de Sales….one of my very favorite saints to read!!

This is one book that has been invaluable to me throughout the daily grind, when struggles may abound. It gives a person the peace of knowing that God is ever there to help. He is merciful and kind.

It also gives logical and practical advice for those who may tend toward scruples, or towards sadness….those with more of a melancholic temperament.

You won’t be disappointed if you purchase this book and it finds its little nook on your bookshelf! 🙂

From the Back of the Book:

Light and Peace is a handbook for getting to Heaven – a short and practical course in proper Christian living that covers all the important aspects of our religious duties.

Far and away the telling feature of this little book is its immense common sense and good advice.

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Thereafter the result one’s knowing where he is going spiritually and how best to achieve this end is “Peace”, that peace which Our Lord promised and which the world cannot give.

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I have prepared this Lenten journal to help you to keep on track. It is to assist you in keeping focused on making Lent a special time for your family. We do not have to do great things to influence those little people. No, we must do the small things in a great way…with love and consistency…

Timeless words from the pen of Bishop Fulton J. Sheen inspire the heart and imagination as readers embark on a Lenten journey toward a better understanding of their spiritual selves. Covering the traditional themes of Lent–sin and salvation, death and Resurrection, sorrow and hope, ashes and lilies–these 50 passages and accompanying mini-prayers offer readers a practical spiritual program as a retreat from the cares and concerns of a secular world view.
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Faith and Humor – Father Lasance

From My Prayer Book, Father Lasance, Happiness in Goodness. Reflections, Counsels, Prayers and Devotions. 1860-1946

Not long ago, in the course of a conversation, a person remarked to me: “But you Catholics are such gloomy persons!” I tried to refute the charge by smiling largely— probatur ridendo.

But my companion subsumed: “O! I don’t mean universally and in every individual case. But your religion — you know – your attitude, your temper, is severe and forbidding and all that.”

This saying seems typical. The days have gone by when Protestants believed that Catholic priests had horns and cloven feet; but the days will hardly come when Protestants will give up their notion that Catholicism and gloom are synonymous, and that the outward badge of our religion is an abiding frown.

Stripping the idea of all that is exaggerated in it, it does us honor, perhaps more honor than Catholics individually can in conscience accept; being a testimony to the serious and wise character of our lives. For obviously life is no jest to a man who believes in its purpose and its eternal duration; who reads its value in the blood of Christ, as our Catholic faith teaches us to do.

Indeed there is none of us but can wish sincerely that we merited a little better the title to somberness in the sense of Catholic seriousness and determination.

But what we are charged with is not, of course, this right sincerity and purposefulness, but an excess of seriousness, a depressing solemnity and heaviness — in a word, a lack of humor. Moreover, the charge is distinctively put against us, not as men, but as Catholics.

We are said to be gloomy by a necessity flowing from our worship, from our belief. It would further seem that not Protestants only, but even Catholics themselves occasionally entertain this notion of the harshness and narrowness and cheerless rigorism of our faith.

It may not be easy to show such as these that in truth our religion is in reality instinct with the subtlest, deepest, richest humor possible to men. Indeed so essential is great humor to Catholic faith that the practical presence or absence of this humor is not a bad test of a man’s vigor or weakness in faith.

Humor is the just appreciation of the incongruous things of life. That is a part definition, at least; for humor is an elusive quality, existing in the concrete, dealing with the concrete, surrounding living things and entering into them, as the oxygen of the air enters into and vivifies our blood.

Men feel its presence and recognize it and honor it and delight in it; but can no more analyze it than one can analyze life, which departs at the touch of the dissecting instrument.

One takes up “HenryIV,”or “Alice in Wonderland”or “The Frogs,” or “Three Men in a Boat,” or “Hudibras,” or “Mr. Dooley’s Philosophy,” — and grows mellow with them, and wise, and says: “What humor may be in the categories, I know not; but they who wrote these things are humorists, children of comprehension and of wisdom.”

They compel us, not to laugh, but to smile. They widen our horizon and draw out our sympathies. In gentleness and with great pity and love, we look from end to end of the earth and are filled with kindly merriment at the misfits we see.

But we know this, that humor is built on truth and knowledge. A man who knows only a fraction of himself and others cannot have that plenitude of humor of one who knows the whole. The humor that is bounded by this world is feeble beside that humor which draws from earth and heaven, from time and eternity.

Faith is the solution and interpretation of life, the bestower of knowledge and of wisdom more than knowledge. Faith widens our limited days here into endless days, and lays bare men’s souls and the secrets of God, and gives us that mastery of life which is needed to laugh at life, and shows us the relation of all things and their harmony, and what preserves that harmony and is admirable, and what jars with that harmony and is laughable.

Knowledge and power, wisdom and love, these are at the roots of all right humor and ring in every laugh that befits the soul of a man.

“Credo” — “I believe in God the Father Almighty” — can bring smiles where tears were, and light where darkness was, and courage and saneness of view where all was gloomy and distorted by sadness.

“The fashion of this world passeth away” — and we alone who know this are the truly light-hearted of the world.  “You shall take none of these things with you” says St. Paul, and I have seen a man smile through his tears beside the grave of his son, because he knew that afterward he himself would leave in another grave the heartache begun at this one.

No, our faith does not lack humor. It abounds in humor; it is humor — the tenderest, most cheery, most lasting humor.

St. Lawrence, directing the roasting of his own body with the nicety of a cook; our Irish peasant who says: “Thanks be to God, my rheumatism is much worse to-day,” our nuns who can be merry in the abode of death; — these are some instances of the humor of faith.

In its fullness, perhaps only the saints have it — those serene, large beings, beneath whose awe-inspiring calmness runs an unbroken ripple of laughter at the follies and pettiness that surround them; whom no adversity disheartens and no sufferings sour; whose eyes are bright with eternal merriment looking on the fashion of this world which passeth away.

I have before me, while writing, the picture of a young man clad in cassock and surplice; a man of lean ascetic face; who holds in his hand a crucifix, and stands by a table on which rest a discarded coronet and a penitential scourge.

Beneath the picture are the words, “Quid hoc ad aeternitatum?” The picture is familiar to all of us, and represents that great saint and universal patron of Catholic youth, Aloysius Gonzaga. The legend under it is a pet saying of Aloysius, a pertinent question applied by him to the thousand and one minutiae of daily life — “How does this look in the light of eternity?”

We can imagine this boy saint, as he passed through the streets of Rome on his way to or from school, or to some hospital or church. An unbeliever would be chilled at his constraint and austerity. ”Another example of monkish, Catholic gloom—a zealot, a fanatic; a man bereft of all sanity or humaneness, looking at life in warped, crabbed manner!”

Yet the unbeliever would be the fanatic, the narrow-minded man; and Aloysius, the humorist. For if the gorge of our spectator friend rose; if he gave expression to his scorn in words; if even he spat upon this Jesuit bigot, Aloysius would have said to himself “Quid hoc ad aeternitatem?” (How does this look in the light of eternity?) and would have gone on his way with a smile, making merry in his heart.

Fancy a man who all day long, in every varying circumstance, was asking himself, “Quid hoc ad aternitatem?” (How does this look in the light of eternity?) What an infinity of laughable things he would see! What a wide, kindly, smiling view of life he would acquire!

Think of the countless occurrences that fret and annoy, that drive a man into himself and shut up his outlook over the world which the good God has given him, that make him petty and irritable and sour — how they would go down before such a question, as rank weeds before a scythe; how they would be lost sight of, as a swarm of gnats becomes invisible under the full light of an unclouded noon!

Whatever be the definition of humor — and it matters exactly nothing what it be — the essence of it is saneness, balance, breadth; and complete saneness, undisturbed balance, infinite breadth, are the gifts of faith and of faith only!

Knowledge stops at the edge of the earth. Faith goes on beyond the stars, illimitable, calm, all-comprehending. The wisdom of the world is a surface wisdom and breeds only a surface humor. The wisdom of faith reaches from heaven to hell, into the heart of all living; and when it smiles the angels of God smile with it.

The humor of men may be on the lips and in the mind only. The humor of faith must come from the heart, from the “understanding heart.”

St. Paul bids us “Rejoice in the Lord always: again, I say, rejoice.” For ours is the heritage of joy; since it is given us to know what God knows, and to love all that He loves, to feel the presence of His angels round about us, to consider life in its completeness, and to look forward unavertedly, beholding the brightness of eternal peace and the sea which is about the throne of God, where the world looks out upon only chaos and the night.

Our faith has a higher purpose than merely to make us wise and patient and kindly. The humor of life is not its object, but it is its true and certain concomitant; growing as it grows, waning as it wanes.

If it can with truth be said of us that we lack humor, we must blame the lack of it not upon our religion, our faith, but upon our unfaith, and our irreligion.

Apropos of this subject, the following item is interesting and instructive:

Dr. A. B. Richardson, for many years in charge of institutions for the insane — among others, the United States Hospital at Washington — was recently asked about the amount of insanity in his institutions that could fairly be attributed to religion. His answer is interesting:

“You have asked me a very easy question. I have tested that matter thoroughly. There are only two patients in this hospital whose insanity has any relation to religion; and I think, from their predisposition to insanity, that they would probably have become insane on some other subject, if they had not on religion.

Now, if you had asked me how many people in Ohio are kept by religion from insanity and out of these hospitals, you would have given me a question hard to answer; for they are a multitude.

The good cheer, bright hopes, rich consolations, good tempers, regular habits, and glad songs of religion are such an antidote for the causes of insanity that thousands of people in Ohio are preserved from insanity by them.

But for the beneficent influence of religion, the State would have to double the capacity of her hospitals in order to accommodate her insane patients.”

The most recent psychological researches are in agreement with Dr. Richardson’s views; and it is practically certain that religion has been bearing for years past one source of abhorrence for which it is in no way responsible. — Ave Maria.

Did you ever reflect that when you put your hand in your husband’s hand before the Church, giving him your heart and your life thenceforward, that God, who is ever by the side of those who believe and trust in Him, promised you a mighty wealth of grace to be all your own till death! -True Womanhood – Rev. Bernard O’Reilly

St Francis de Sales was a true gentleman and a knight. What did that mean…

Your solution to chapel veils that slip off! Little Girl’s Lovely and Lacey Crocheted Veils made for the season… Available here.

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In With God in Russia, Ciszek reflects on his daily life as a prisoner, the labor he endured while working in the mines and on construction gangs, his unwavering faith in God, and his firm devotion to his vows and vocation. Enduring brutal conditions, Ciszek risked his life to offer spiritual guidance to fellow prisoners who could easily have exposed him for their own gains. He chronicles these experiences with grace, humility, and candor, from his secret work leading mass and hearing confessions within the prison grounds, to his participation in a major gulag uprising, to his own “resurrection”—his eventual release in a prisoner exchange in October 1963 which astonished all who had feared he was dead.

Powerful and inspirational, With God in Russia captures the heroic patience, endurance, and religious conviction of a man whose life embodied the Christian ideals that sustained him…..

Captured by a Russian army during World War II and convicted of being a “Vatican spy,” Jesuit Father Walter J. Ciszek spent 23 agonizing years in Soviet prisons and the labor camps of Siberia. Only through an utter reliance on God’s will did he manage to endure the extreme hardship. He tells of the courage he found in prayer–a courage that eased the loneliness, the pain, the frustration, the anguish, the fears, the despair. For, as Ciszek relates, the solace of spiritual contemplation gave him an inner serenity upon which he was able to draw amidst the “arrogance of evil” that surrounded him. Ciszek learns to accept the inhuman work in the infamous Siberian salt mines as a labor pleasing to God. And through that experience, he was able to turn the adverse forces of circumstance into a source of positive value and a means of drawing closer to the compassionate and never-forsaking Divine Spirit.

He Leadeth Me is a book to inspire all Christians to greater faith and trust in God–even in their darkest hour. As the author asks, “What can ultimately trouble the soul that accepts every moment of every day as a gift from the hands of God and strives always to do his will?”
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Two Kinds of Saints

From An Easy Way to Become a Saint by Father Paul O’Sullivan, 1949

There are saints and saints. Some we may call “extraordinary saints” and some “ordinary saints.”

Extraordinary saints are raised up by God for some extraordinary mission, and to these God gives extraordinary means to carry out that mission.

Such were, for instance, St. Dominic, St. Francis of Assisi, St. Ignatius Loyola and a host of others.

St. Dominic was raised up by God to defend the Church against the Albigensian heretics, who taught the vilest doctrines and perpetrated the most hideous crimes. Kings sent armies against them, the Pope sent holy men to check them, but all in vain.

God then raised up St. Dominic who, by the holiness of his life and his earnest preaching, converted 100,000 of these hardened sinners in a remarkably short time.

Notwithstanding his austere life and incessant labors, there was no one more joyful, more lovable than St. Dominic. He was sad only when he heard of the sorrows of others or of offenses committed against his dear Lord.

The Saint founded three religious orders, which have given to the Church notable saints, missionaries, martyrs, bishops and popes.

What especially endears him to us is the fact that it was he who gave us the Rosary, which God’s Holy Mother had given to him.

Who has not heard of the seraphic St. Francis of Assisi, so famous for his profound humility, his extreme poverty and his burning love of God, as a reward of which he received on his hands and feet and in his side the Sacred Stigmata, the marks of Christ’s five wounds.

He, too, founded three religious orders, which have given many and great saints to the Church, people such as St. Bonaventure, St. Anthony of Padua, St. Clare and many others, saints who shine as bright stars in the firmament of Heaven.

St. Ignatius of Loyola is another example of an extraordinary saint. He began life as a soldier in the army of Spain, but God called him to be a great soldier of Holy Church. To him was given the mission to battle against the pseudo-reformers, as to St. Dominic had been given the task of converting the Albigenses.

His glorious order, the Society of Jesus, has done and is ever doing a mighty work for the glory of God and for the welfare of the world at large. His sons are ever in the vanguard of the battle, fighting valiantly against the enemies of Christ.

Now these extraordinary saints, inspired by God, used extraordinary means to achieve their great ends.

They labored incessantly, spent long hours in prayer, fasted rigorously and did severe penance. God favored them with supernatural visions and revelations and gave them the power of working miracles.

Ordinary Christians are not called upon to do such mighty deeds, nor are they asked or advised to imitate the long prayers, the rigorous fasts of these extraordinary saints.

ORDINARY SAINTS

There is, however, a second class of saints, ordinary saints. Bear in mind that these saints are no less saints than the others; they are true saints and have reached exalted heights of sanctity, though in a different way.

They lead humble, simple lives, performing their daily duties well and using the ordinary but abundant means of sanctity given by God to all Christians.

These means we too can use, and by them we can attain a high degree of holiness. Here is a good example of the ordinary saint.

THE TWO LADIES

The great St. Antony, the abbot who had spent long years in the desert, passing whole nights in prayer and performing severe penances, aware of how important the virtue of humility is in the spiritual life, asked God to make him profoundly humble.

In answer to his prayer, the Almighty directed him to visit two ladies in the neighboring city, who though simple and unpretentious in their manner of life, were, so God told Antony, holier than he who had spent long years in the practice of rigorous penance and unceasing prayer.

On entering their home, the Saint sought to discover the secret of such remarkable holiness; he asked them many questions as to the fasts they made, the length of their prayers, their austerities and the like, so that he might imitate them.

He was not a little surprised to learn that they did nothing exceptional. They observed the fasts of the Church; they said their prayers devoutly; they gave what little alms they could afford; they frequented the Sacraments, heard daily Mass and practiced the ordinary Christian virtues.

What impressed the Saint most was that they loved God very simply but very sincerely. God was the great reality in their lives. They did all their actions for love of Him. They performed their daily duties, seeing God in all they did.

They accepted what happened to them, joys as well as sorrows, as coming directly from His hand.

That was all, but it sufficed to explain to the Saint the secret of their wonderful sanctity, viz., they performed their duties well and they loved God. There are thousands of such hidden, ordinary saints in the Church now, as there have been at all times.

“Living to please others is a very real form of bondage. It enslaves and destroys. The only way to be liberated is to carry our crosses and submit to the shame of pleasing God over men. We must learn to love our Savior more than praise and approval, for only then will we be truly free.” – The Catholic Gentleman

Coloring Pages for your children….

A good sermon. A mother needs the gift of fortitude to inspire her children on the path to holiness!

Definitely a beautiful, yet challenging message for our times! “After presenting the richness of the Gospel message, more beautiful than any other world view, he explains how Gospel frugality is lived in each state of life.” (afflink)

Happy Are You Poor: The Simple Life and Spiritual Freedom by Fr. Thomas Dubay

“To the modern mind, the concept of poverty is often confused with destitution. But destitution emphatically is not the Gospel ideal. A love-filled sharing frugality is the message, and Happy Are You Poor explains the meaning of this beatitude lived and taught by Jesus himself. But isn’t simplicity in lifestyle meant only for nuns and priests? Are not all of us to enjoy the goodness and beauties of our magnificent creation? Are parents to be frugal with the children they love so much?

The renowned spiritual writer Dubay gives surprising replies to these questions. He explains how material things are like extensions of our persons and thus of our love. If everyone lived this love there would be no destitution.

After presenting the richness of the Gospel message, more beautiful than any other world view, he explains how Gospel frugality is lived in each state of life.”

 

I have prepared this Lenten journal to help you to keep on track. It is to assist you in keeping focused on making Lent a special time for your family. We do not have to do great things to influence those little people. No, we must do the small things in a great way…with love and consistency…

Timeless words from the pen of Bishop Fulton J. Sheen inspire the heart and imagination as readers embark on a Lenten journey toward a better understanding of their spiritual selves. Covering the traditional themes of Lent–sin and salvation, death and Resurrection, sorrow and hope, ashes and lilies–these 50 passages and accompanying mini-prayers offer readers a practical spiritual program as a retreat from the cares and concerns of a secular world view.
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Cheerfulness – Fr. Lovasik & New Podcast

From Kindness – The Bloom of Charity, Fr. Lovasik

Cheerfulness and kindness go hand in hand. Cultivate the spirit of cheerfulness from a supernatural motive. This means self-restraint, self-control for the love of God and your neighbor.

Take care not to lose your temper; for nobody wants it. Keep a smile on your face and a kind word on your tongue all day long towards your superiors, equals, and inferiors. You will make others happy, and find happiness yourself in giving joy and comfort to others.

A smile, like a yawn, is infectious. Smile and you will receive a smile in return, but if you should meet a churl, who gives you a frown for a smile, well, with a gracious word to him, take your departure; let this not disturb you. Your Guardian Angel has recorded your good deed, and your kindness will receive a heavenly reward.

In Praise of UnMarried Women – Fr. Daniel A. Lord

Painting by Joseph Rodefer DeCamp

By DANIEL A. LORD, S.J.

Australian Catholic Truth Society 1950

Whatever literature may say about spinsters, and however much history may ignore them – except for outstanding spinsters like Elizabeth of England – the Church’s attitude toward unmarried women has been, from the first, one of reverence.

This I came to know when my faith emerged from mere youthful practice to intelligent study and appreciation. Among the Jews a spinster was merely an unfortunate girl not lucky enough to have won a husband for herself. Among the pagans she was usually the slave or bondmaiden, the grudgingly tolerated hanger-on in the house of her parents or her luckier married sisters.

My Response is My Responsibility

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loving relationships, my response is my responsibility, self justification, self pity, silent treatment

For Throwback Thursday….

I listened to this podcast more than once and got much out of it so I wanted to share it with you!

Based on the Podcast My Response is My Responsibility by Emerson Eggerichs of Love and Respect Ministries

Disclaimer

Think about this phrase for a moment, “My response is MY responsibility”. This is a very powerful phrase!

There is the story of a time during WWII Nazi Regime rule. A Christian French man who had been harboring Jews had been captured. German soldiers brought him before an SS Soldier known as “The Torturer”. Surprisingly to those around him, the French man was at peace and it shone through his eyes and his face.

The SS officer was not impressed! Taking it as insolence, he yelled, “Get that smirk off your face!”

Others who had entered into his presence were terrified and showed it.

The SS soldier once again looked at the French man and screamed, “Don’t you know who I am??!!”

“Yes, I do,” said the French man, “You are called ‘The Torturer’ and you have the power to have me tortured. You also have the power to condemn me to death” There was a pause. “But you do not have the power to get me to hate you.”

This story shows so clearly the control we have to be free from sinful attitudes and responses within ourselves even under the most trying circumstances! Other people cannot control our inner world.

My Response is my Responsibility – this phrase can change our lives!

People may be able to control us physically but they cannot control our thoughts! People can treat us unkindly but they cannot control our spirit!

I can rule my own inner responses – this is a God-given right. No one can make me hate them.

Even the Gestapo, as worldly powerful as they seemed to be, could not rule over the French man’s inner realm.

How does a person get to the point where they are no longer ruled by other’s treatment of them?

We begin by realizing My response is my responsibility!

We don’t need to mope or pout. We don’t need to give the silent treatment or let the rage build inside of us until it comes out of our mouths like a faucet – remember it is your responsibility to control your inner thoughts, those nasty habits that have gotten so out of hand. Time to look them square in the eye and say – I don’t have to listen to you….I don’t have to respond this way!!

If we let others control how we respond, then they are the master of our emotions. If they are mean and unjust, we will be unhappy. What we are saying, then, is that we are a hopeless and helpless emotional victim to the moods and attitudes of others around us!

When we are around uncaring and mean-spirited people, there is no hope for us. We are at the whim of these negative people and we will have a rotten day!

This does not have to be our reality!

Are you frustrated with your husband? Do you blame him for your unhappiness? Do you say to yourself, “If he loved me properly, I would in turn respect him and all would be well?”

That is making your husband “Lord” of your emotions and happiness.

That kind of power should not be given to another human being.

If this is how we think, then when our husband treats us imperfectly (and he will, as he is an imperfect human being) then we are moody and grumpy; we snap at him, we let that black cloud settle over us. We resort to resentment and anger and depression.

Because our husband, whom we have given power to rule over our inner spirit, lets us down, we are depressed. He is responsible for our happiness!

Ok, so let’s step back….. are we saying we shouldn’t be affected at all by what other people say and do?

Let’s take an analogy. A doctor taps our knee with a little hammer and our leg involuntarily kicks out. This is known as a “knee-jerk” reaction, right?

What about road rage? When someone cuts us off, we emotionally get angry…. but are we saying that we cannot help ourselves when we cuss at the person, try to cut him off in return or other such offensive actions?

Though we have involuntary emotions, that, yes, are acceptable, there are some that cross the line….and we usually know when and what those emotions are.

If our anger is not righteous indignation, if it is unrighteous, and if it has become a habit because we have given into those emotions throughout our life, then this is wrong and needs to be turned around.

Each person tends to blame their own bitterness, harshness and contempt on the other person. We claim it is involuntary; the other person caused the anger…..

Please hear a simple and profound truth….people do not CAUSE us to be who we are, they REVEAL who we are. Ouch. My response is my responsibility. The Nazi did not cause the Frenchman to react in kindness; he revealed the kindness within him.

How many times through the day is our inner person revealed: Those times when the kids are tugging on our skirt and we snap at them “What do you want AGAIN!” Little Jill spills her milk and we look at her and say through gritted teeth, “You are the most careless child I have ever met!” Hubby comes home tired and sees no dinner being fixed and complains (maybe unjustifiably) and we yell at him and give him the silent treatment the rest of the night.

These dear ones don’t CAUSE our anger, they reveal it. We do not HAVE to react this way….no, we don’t.

In each of these instances, we blame Johnny, Jill and our hubby. We say to ourselves, “I would never blow my stack if everyone behaves! Life stinks!”

We choose to live under the delusion that life experiences cause us to be upset and angry. Although we would never voice that we are a victim, this is how we sometimes live.

Living this way, in victim mode, changes the nursery rhyme:

“Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall,

Humpty Dumpty had a great fall.

Humpty Dumpty was pushed.”

Let’s just blame humanity. I would be happy if it wasn’t for people! Sounds silly, doesn’t it?

We have unrealistic expectations and requirements that everyone else around us (and especially hubby, since he is a grown human being) needs to meet! He must…..be perfect. 😛

We want to assign blame; there is something inside of us that wants to justify our bad behavior.

As Emerson points out, Adam blamed Eve, Eve blamed the serpent. The serpent didn’t have anyone to blame because he didn’t have a leg to stand on! 😀

Our Lord says these things come from the heart of man. It is something within us that cause us to react in these unedifying ways. I have evil thoughts because I have chosen to think bad things. I have a hateful reaction because it is in my heart. I slander because it is in my heart to bad mouth people and the list goes on….

Our response is not another’s responsibility.

This message is challenging.

It is hard to face up to.

These challenges may be small, everyday things, but it can also be huge struggles and sufferings like the French man.

We do have freedom to respond with dignity.

Can I do this when my blood is boiling? Can I choose not to react angrily?

This idea of blaming someone else of my bad attitudes is inappropriate. This doesn’t mean that bad behavior is to be sanctioned. This doesn’t mean that the other person doesn’t have to deal with their issues. They do. But that’s a different matter than my response to him. This is what we are talking about here.

We must not think that if we respond with dignity and love, that we are letting the other person off the hook. We have to come to the point that we realize that we can speak what is true and NECESSARY. But we do so in a kind, loving and respectful way. This empowers us.

If we become uncorked, it does not help us to govern the situation.  Your husband will eventually close his spirit if you are continually “letting him have it”! He will not want to be around you. You will have no credibility with him.

You may win a battle here and there by coming unglued and blaming everyone, but eventually you lose the war. This is a painful reality.

Let’s begin to react properly. But we need to give ourselves some grace. This is a process. We may know it, but our application of it will not be perfect.

Like the French man, in a concentration camp who made it through….. He observed and came to these conclusions:

Our purpose as humans is not to seek power or pleasure but to seek purpose. No situation has the power to control us. 

When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves!

Everything can be taken from a man except one thing, to choose one’s attitude in any given circumstances.

Between unloving or disrespectful behavior and my response, there is a space. In that space is that power to choose our response. In our response lie our growth and our freedom.

The one thing another can’t take away from me is the freedom to choose how to respond to what someone does to me.

Forces beyond your control can take away everything you possess except one thing, the freedom to choose how you will respond to the situation.

Our great freedom is the freedom to choose our attitude.

The French man’s story really leaves the rest of us without excuse at some level. How in the world can I come uncorked when the person cuts me off in the road, or hubby is angry?

I do have a choice. Like the French man I can change my responses.

Remember, My Response is My Responsibility! Will I take this to heart?

“Happiness in marriage must be earned. It is something you must work out for yourself, chiefly by forgetting yourself and serving others. No marriage is a success unless less you make it so, and that takes persistent effort and, still more, a constant and humble reliance on God.” – Fr. Lawrence G. Lovasik. The Catholic Family Handbook

 Who can resist those little ditties, those lovely little sing-song verses called Nursery Rhymes!

Songs and rhymes for young children have been passed down from generation to generation. They are fun, children love them, and they provide a warm, nurturing experience for the whole family.

Nursery Rhymes can be very valuable in a child’s reading development. They are short and easy to repeat and they become some of the child’s first sentences. They also help the child practice the rhythm of language….pitch, volume and voice inflection.

Our own children grew up learning and repeating Nursery Rhymes. It was very enjoyable and it was an easy way to teach the children the use of rhythm and rhyme.

How much more meaningful those little poems would have been if there had been more depth in the considerations behind each little verse! That is where this book comes in. It gives us some lovely rhymes that can, and should, be committed to heart by your children.

Not only will it provide all the benefits of reading and memorizing, but it will supply some simple reflections that will turn those little minds to what is most important in their life….their Catholic Faith.

It is important that young children learn to memorize through verse. Research shows children learn more in their first eight years than they do in the rest of their lives. This is a powerful time to teach them.

So, parents, here is a teaching tool that can help! Encourage your children to learn the poems in this book. Let them peruse the pages and look at the pictures. You will find that it will be a meaningful experience for all!

Inspire and delight your children with these lighthearted and faith-filled poems. Take a peek here.

Volumes One and Two available here.

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The entire collection of twelve Books of Saints St. Joseph Picture Books, packaged in a handsome and sturdy slipcase….

Treasury of Novenas contains over 40 popular Novenas specifically arranged in accord with the Liturgical Year on the Feasts of Jesus, Mary, and many favorite Saints. By acclaimed author Rev. Lawrence G. Lovasik, S.V.D., this book has a rich, gold-stamped brown Dura-Lux cover and is an excellent collection of Novenas for private devotion.

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Give Your Loved Ones the Gift of Courtesy this Year

This is such a beautiful excerpt that gives us an opportunity to meditate on something that should never grow old…that old-fashioned virtue, Courtesy.  Yes, it is very “in” to be courteous, especially to those within our four walls.

by J.R. Miller

A secret of happiness in married life is courtesy. By what law of nature or of life is it, that after the peals of the wedding bells have died away, and they have established themselves in their own home, so many husbands and wives drop the charming little amenities and refinements of manner toward each other, that so invariably and delightfully characterized their interaction before marriage?

Is there no necessity for these civilities any longer ? Are they so sure now of each other’s love, that they do not need to give expression to it, either in affectionate word or act? Is wedded love such a strong, vigorous and self-sufficing plant that it never needs sunshine, rain or dew?

Is politeness merely a manner that is necessary in interaction with the outside world, and not required when we are alone with those we love the best? Are home hearts so peculiarly constituted, that they are not pained or offended by things that would never be pardoned in us, if done in ordinary society?

Are we under no obligations to be respectful and to pay homage to our dearest friends— while even to the rudest clown, or the greatest stranger, which we meet outside our own doors— we feel ourselves bound to show the most perfect civility?

On the contrary, there is no place in the world where the amenities of courtesy should be so carefully maintained, as in the home. There are no hearts which hunger so, for expressions of affection, as the hearts of which we are most sure. There is no love which so needs its daily bread—as the love that is strongest and holiest.

There is no place where rudeness or incivility is so unpardonable, as inside our own doors and toward our best beloved! The tenderer the love and the truer— the more it craves the thousand little attentions and kindnesses which so satisfy the heart!

It is not costly presents at Christmas and on birthdays and anniversaries, that are needed ; these are only mockeries— if the days between are empty of affectionate expressions.

Jewelry and silks will never atone for the lack of warmth and tenderness. Between husband and wife there should be maintained , without break or pause— the most perfect courtesy, the gentlest attention, the most unselfish amiability, the utmost affectionateness!

Coleridge says, “The happiness of life is made up of minute fractions, the little soon-forgotten charities of a kiss or a smile, a kind look, a heartfelt compliment, and the countless infinitesimals of pleasurable thought and genial feeling .”

These may seem trifles, and the omission of them may be deemed unworthy of thought; but they are the daily bread of love, and hearts go hungry when they are omitted.

It may be only carelessness at first in a busy husband or a weary wife— which fails in these small, sweet courtesies, and it may seem a little matter— but in the end the result may be a growing far apart of two lives which might have been forever very happy in each other— had their early love but been cherished and nourished.

“Do the things you don’t want to do. Do them cheerfully and well. E.Schaeffer wrote, ‘Somebody has to get up early, stay up late, do more than the others, if the human garden is to be a thing of beauty.’ At first glance it doesn’t seem fair, but there are hidden and precious rewards for dying to self and serving. Stomping and self-pity cancel the reward points.” 😊 -Charlotte Siems

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Review: Catholic Mother Goose, Volume Two, is a ‘one of a kind’ treasure for young and old alike! Little minds will be captivated by the beautifully colored and illustrated pages. Throughout the nursery rhymes, children will learn the lessons of kindness, unselfishness, the efficacy of suffering and the value of prayer! They will become more familiar with the lives of the Saints, St. Therese, St. Francis, etc. and their great love for Jesus and Mary. These beautifully written poems will plant the seed for good literature and a love for reading for years to come. This is how we make our Catholic faith and culture come alive for our children! This book is a must!

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So Very Thankful by Theresa Byrne

So very thankful,
Incredibly grateful,
Unbelievably blessed!

Without the cloves, cinnamon and ginger, the pie is mundane and tasteless. So it goes with life….a little Joy, Thanksgiving and Gratefulness adds flavor!

The past year or so it has become very apparent to me how important it is to be grateful. As the thought-provoking question goes, “If you were able to keep everything you were grateful for today, what would you have?”

When I seriously look at my life I see how I have been so blessed, but it’s so easy to get caught up in the “what I don’t have” or the comparing game.

Thrift shopping, I overheard a conversation between a grandmother and a small grandchild, that she had on an outing. The child loudly, obnoxiously hollered in the middle of the store, “I want to go to Chick-fil-A, not stupid McDonald’s!” Ugh, is this what we have become? I remember the first time I went to McDonald’s it was on my honeymoon. Growing up, going out to eat was a very rare, joyous occasion!

For me, having children is the best way to see where my attitude is at. They reflect me. As a stay-at-home, homeschooling Mom, there is no one that they rub shoulders with more than me. The more I have become aware of their attitudes, the more I know me.

When my seven-year-old daughter started yelling more at her siblings, I stopped and saw me. When my nine year old son kept getting frustrated in school and repeating, “I’m not comprehending,” I saw me. And so on and on we go.

The positive I have learned through this, is that I can change my attitude, and just like the bad, the good also rubs off. In the past year I have tried to be more consciously grateful. …For the beautiful day, for a warm home, good food, the people I love. While this has been a huge positive, I realize that in order for my kids to pick it up I must verbalize gratefulness.

So I try. During the day I will say things like, “Thank you for this beautiful day, Jesus,” or “We are so blessed to have this good food!” The more I have verbalized gratefulness, the easier it has become. Just like the yelling rubs off, so does the gratitude.

It warms my heart when my very hungry four-year-old gushes, “Thank you, Jesus, for this beautiful food!”

As we have begun to practice gratitude more and more, we have found more to be grateful for. The negatives can turn into a positive. For instance, “Daddy has to work late again tonight, but we are very grateful he has lots of work and we might be able to do something as a family, with the extra money.”

In general, I feel that gratitude has made us more happy and joyous. Sometimes I can feel the joy bubble over, and I believe that has become the side effect of gratitude….

“When gratitude becomes your default setting, Life Changes.” -Nancy Demos

It has also made me more aware of the lack of gratitude. When we were young, mom would go shopping and usually bring us home a little treat from the Health Food Store. We would always work very hard to have the house sparkling clean, and we were always very grateful for our stick of licorice or stevia soda.

So one day, when I got home from a shopping trip, and my son demanded, “What did you get for me?” I thought, “Uh-oh, what am I creating?”

Next time I went to town, I skipped the treat and that seemed to make the impression… that it is not something to be demanded or expected, but to be grateful for.

I feel like gratitude has helped us make a big deal out of little things for us. We are grateful to make homemade fries, to go on a walk, to have a bonfire. It is beautiful, simple and I feel blessed!

This Thanksgiving, our family is trying to remember the spices of Joy, Thanksgiving and Gratefulness! It just makes the pie so much better!

“A true wife makes a man’s life nobler, stronger, grander, by the omnipotence of her love ‘turning all the forces of manhood upward and heavenward.’ While she clings to him in holy confidence and loving dependence she brings out in him whatever is noblest and richest in his being. She inspires him with her courage and earnestness. She beautifies his life. She softens whatever is rude and harsh in his habits or his spirit. She clothes him with the gentler graces of refined and cultured manhood. While she yields to him and never disregards his lightest wish, she is really his queen, ruling his whole life and leading him onward and upward in every proper path.” J.R.Miller

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In With God in Russia, Ciszek reflects on his daily life as a prisoner, the labor he endured while working in the mines and on construction gangs, his unwavering faith in God, and his firm devotion to his vows and vocation. Enduring brutal conditions, Ciszek risked his life to offer spiritual guidance to fellow prisoners who could easily have exposed him for their own gains. He chronicles these experiences with grace, humility, and candor, from his secret work leading mass and hearing confessions within the prison grounds, to his participation in a major gulag uprising, to his own “resurrection”—his eventual release in a prisoner exchange in October 1963 which astonished all who had feared he was dead.

Powerful and inspirational, With God in Russia captures the heroic patience, endurance, and religious conviction of a man whose life embodied the Christian ideals that sustained him…..

Captured by a Russian army during World War II and convicted of being a “Vatican spy,” Jesuit Father Walter J. Ciszek spent 23 agonizing years in Soviet prisons and the labor camps of Siberia. Only through an utter reliance on God’s will did he manage to endure the extreme hardship. He tells of the courage he found in prayer–a courage that eased the loneliness, the pain, the frustration, the anguish, the fears, the despair. For, as Ciszek relates, the solace of spiritual contemplation gave him an inner serenity upon which he was able to draw amidst the “arrogance of evil” that surrounded him. Ciszek learns to accept the inhuman work in the infamous Siberian salt mines as a labor pleasing to God. And through that experience, he was able to turn the adverse forces of circumstance into a source of positive value and a means of drawing closer to the compassionate and never-forsaking Divine Spirit.

He Leadeth Me is a book to inspire all Christians to greater faith and trust in God–even in their darkest hour. As the author asks, “What can ultimately trouble the soul that accepts every moment of every day as a gift from the hands of God and strives always to do his will?”
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